How Sweet It Is!

HANK PHILLIPPI RYAN:  I get it now, I do. They invented Halloween not as an opportunity for kids to dress up, but as an opportunity for adults to buy candy, all they want, with the built-in excuse that it's "for the kids"

Halloween is also an excuse for women of a certain ilk to dress up in skimpy outfits and pretend it's a costume. One year, one of my pals wore black tights and a black leotard--and that is all! And then she the swirled herself in pale blue gauze, and called herself a hurricane. I beg you. In fact, I bet the sales of black tights and black leotards skyrockets at Halloween. but I digress.

Seriously, Reds, I buy Twizzlers and Snickers and Almond Joy, my very favorites, and then I hope nobody comes to the door. :-)  Well, no, that's not true, I love trick or treaters, actually ,and get a huge kick out of them.  But I am also happy to be able to buy Twizzlers and Snickers.

This year I also bought pencils. Yes, pencils. They are cool, funny, Halloween pencils, and I wondered if that was a better (healthier and more useful) treat than candy. I mean--I LOVE pencils! They are not as sweet and swirly as Twizzlers, but they last longer and do not melt. And although you can write with a Twizzler, you cannot read it. And you can never erase Twizzler marks.

But I fear the goblins and hurricanes will not appreciate pencils.

So two things: Are you getting candy?  What kind?

And: Do you think the kids will go for pencils? Or any candy alternative?

No, three things. Do you eat candy corns color by color? Or all at once?

LUCY BURDETTE: Speaking of costumes, Hank, as you well know, the Crime Bake conference banquet is famous for costumes. I wanted to go this year with 2 pals as James Bond and two of the Bond girls. (Speaking of leotards and all...) But whispering now, instead we're going as Poirot and 2 Miss Marples. Sigh. It turns out that I used to dress as Miss Marple in my therapy practice days, so the outfit was a snap.

No candy, we don't live in a neighborhood so no one comes. Pencils for the gluten-free or sugar averse? And the few candy corns I eat, all at once.

RHYS BOWEN: This is so funny, Hank, because John and I were in Safeway yesterday and he actually said, "We need to stock up on Kit Kats for Halloween. Look, two big bags for ten dollars." And I replied, "We only get about five kids at the most."  And he grinned and said, "So?"  He loves kit kats. I deplore this devious way of stocking up with Kit Kats. If I do it it will be with healthy Snickers and Milky Ways!

 

I've been to a couple of fun Halloween parties--I once went as a fallen angel when John was the devil. In those days he had black hair and a little black beard and he stuck on fake horns and looked very scary. But I fear our dressing up days are over.  I'm more concerned about sexually provocative costumes for little girls!

HALLIE EPHRON: Always candy! My neighborhood is full of kids. They play out in the street, such a lovely quaint idea, and Halloween is about the biggest holiday of the year. I mean the street is seriously lit up, more even than Christmas. I used to buy the candy I don't like because otherwise it would all be gone by Halloween. Turned out it was still gone. Now I buy what I like (Hershey's chocolate, Swedish fish) but not until just before Halloween so it can't get Hoovered if up before the kiddies arrive.

My granddaughter will visit us for Halloween and I can't wait to re-experience a 2 1/2-year-old's Halloween. Remembering when my daughter was that age and helped answer the door and told us "Man with four faces" had come. Four was her generic number for anything more than 1. Translation: man wearing a mask.

Pencils? Not so much. But I haven't got a better idea.

I feel outed on the Candy corn. I like the brown/orange/white ones and I bite off one color at a time.

HANK: Well, I do, too,  of COURSE, because that’s the only way to eat  those things. Yucky as they are...

DEBORAH CROMBIE: They truck in trick-or-treaters to a street a few block from us. I'm serious! It's a madhouse. But we don't get many. If it's nice I'll sit on the front porch for an hour or so just in case any "littles" come by. (Once we start getting teenagers in hoodies, that's it.) So of course I have to buy candy! Mini Hershey's from the supermarket yesterday. Now to keep Rick from eating them all between now and Halloween, that's the trick. (I might eat a couple, I admit. I love the crackly ones.)

Hank, good luck with the pencils... I would like them.  As for candy corn, ugh. Cannot stand. Even when I was a kid. It makes my teeth hurt.

Oh, and actually I think the hurricane Halloween costume was pretty clever! Did she have a blue drink to match?

HANK: Yes, fine, it was cute. Sigh.

JULIA SPENCER-FLEMING: Debs, that makes me think of one of my life lessons: just say no to blue drinks. I don't know what that blue liquor is, but it's a killer.

We live in the country, and have hardly any trick-or-treaters, but Ross buys the giant bags of Hersey's Miniatures just the same. It used to be my job to get the Hallowe'en candy, but he and the kids complained that I was the only person left alive who still likes those caramels-wrapped-around-the-white-center candies. Our location was wonderful for the children when they were little; we could hit every house within walking range in a half hour and they knew all the grown-ups answering the doors, so it wasn't scary. When they got older and more, shall we say, result oriented, we'd drive into Portland and hook up with friends. Half the fun of taking the kids trick-or-treating is wandering a few steps behind with another couple moms, drinking Sam Adams Pumpkin Ale and critiquing everyone's decorations.

Hank, I think your pencils will go over fine. Every year, Youngest got Hallowe'en pencils, stickers and plastic tchotkes like spider rings and eyeballs. She loved them. And I eat candy corn by the colors, of course. Anything faster is just tooooo sweet - those things are solid corn syrup, right?

So two questions, Reds—what candy do you get? And is it for the trick or treaters? Or for…you?

And the mystery of the universe: do the sections of the candy corn taste different?

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And HANK ON TOUR news: are you in Indianapolis (Carmel Clay Library), Madison WI (Mystery to Me Bookstore)  or Oakmont PA (Mystery Lover’s Bookstore? That’s my Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday schedule—before I come home to see Susan! Please come visit and talk about WHAT YOU SEE!   Click here for the details!  

And Susan's MRS. ROOSEVELT'S CONFIDANTE is out tomorrow! YAY!