tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1001156153899984046.post3446234598089734607..comments2024-03-29T02:43:11.575-04:00Comments on Jungle Red Writers: Just Call Me "Talks With Strangers"Jungle Red Writershttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16646429819267618412noreply@blogger.comBlogger87125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1001156153899984046.post-622514275886661372019-06-08T16:15:39.679-04:002019-06-08T16:15:39.679-04:00If you talk to someone in an elevator in Scandinav...If you talk to someone in an elevator in Scandinavia they will get off on the next floor it stops on to get away from you. My British colleague described how long it took for her to understand the very subtle signal Swedes use when they have the window seat on the tram and are getting off on the next stop, we don’t say “excuse me I am getting off” instead we have these rituals involving getting our bag and zipping up our coats all to AVOID talking. <br /><br />And if talking to your cat does not count as social interactions I am in trouble. In my defence it is usually in response to something she said 😉Zeehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11504105694800511170noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1001156153899984046.post-54047391629607449602019-05-26T18:12:47.943-04:002019-05-26T18:12:47.943-04:00DebRo, if you're active on other mystery-relat...DebRo, if you're active on other mystery-related boards as well, you may want to consider finding a roommie for Malice (which is big, bit not as big as Bouchercon.) Having just one person with you makes a huge difference, and if you find someone else who's an icebreaker, I guarantee you, you'd wind up having lots of delightful conversations (but not with a crowd!)Juliahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09553268569509053159noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1001156153899984046.post-59270887588445972092019-05-26T18:09:02.002-04:002019-05-26T18:09:02.002-04:00That's a wonderful turn in the plot, Emily!That's a wonderful turn in the plot, Emily!Juliahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09553268569509053159noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1001156153899984046.post-54326069028425722732019-05-26T18:08:20.759-04:002019-05-26T18:08:20.759-04:00A little bit here, a little bit there - I think th...A little bit here, a little bit there - I think that's how most of us who live alone put our social lives together, Sally.Juliahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09553268569509053159noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1001156153899984046.post-51689467018118556272019-05-26T18:07:31.259-04:002019-05-26T18:07:31.259-04:00It can be tough if you live alone AND you're n...It can be tough if you live alone AND you're not a talk-with-everyone type. My dad is in that place now, after my mom passed away, and he's compensated by having two regular weekly social interactions: he drives a neighbor to Mass with him every Sunday, and he's part of an informal community men's group that breakfasts together at Denny's every Wednesday (he lives in an "adults only" community where almost everyone is retired.) Just that little bit is keeping him pretty cheerful and steady.Juliahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09553268569509053159noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1001156153899984046.post-7708156148009177922019-05-24T09:59:36.623-04:002019-05-24T09:59:36.623-04:00Julia, how fun!Julia, how fun!Bibliophilehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07764234701385787238noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1001156153899984046.post-54286487389883487152019-05-24T09:59:00.866-04:002019-05-24T09:59:00.866-04:00Jay, my apologies. I hope I did not offend you wi...Jay, my apologies. I hope I did not offend you with my Doc Martin comment. Yes, the British TV show. People still like him anyway.<br /><br />Julia, that's a brilliant category!Bibliophilehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07764234701385787238noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1001156153899984046.post-47720090709723451972019-05-24T00:47:48.560-04:002019-05-24T00:47:48.560-04:00I'm very much a Bashful Bill. If you get me g...I'm very much a Bashful Bill. If you get me going on a subject I care about, I can go for a while, but I have a very hard time starting a conversation, especially with strangers. And it seems like I ramble on about books and TV shows, but not about things that matter much.<br /><br />And I also agree about people living alone. I am enjoying not having a roommate most of the time, but there are days I miss having company around the condo.Mark Bakerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11567392254011373198noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1001156153899984046.post-29935246299734567482019-05-23T19:25:03.151-04:002019-05-23T19:25:03.151-04:00Thank you, Gigi, for the suggestions and the moral...Thank you, Gigi, for the suggestions and the moral support!Margie Buntinghttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10120666616254809025noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1001156153899984046.post-89827957639635903982019-05-23T18:27:48.245-04:002019-05-23T18:27:48.245-04:00I was very shy as a child but am more outgoing now...I was very shy as a child but am more outgoing now. Mostly I'm content living alone although I try to see my friends as often as possible. Two friends text almost every day, and some e-mail. I check Facebook every day and sometimes call people. Our church started a senior club last year that meets once a month except for the winter.Sally from PAhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03649707016754971847noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1001156153899984046.post-80923333676001415832019-05-23T18:18:16.494-04:002019-05-23T18:18:16.494-04:00Pat D, even though I am very social, it is a diffe...Pat D, even though I am very social, it is a different story when I drive or when I am a passenger in a car. While driving, I must focus 100 percent on driving. As a passenger, I do NOT want to distract the driver.<br />Bibliophilehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07764234701385787238noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1001156153899984046.post-90106390515515946202019-05-23T17:29:22.395-04:002019-05-23T17:29:22.395-04:00Thanks, Julia! I have a different take on mobile ...Thanks, Julia! I have a different take on mobile phones. I use the "siri" to help me with my speech. Sometimes my words are clear. Sometimes not. I use social media to find out about events like a Left Coast Crime event that day. I use text instead of talking on the phone. Before social media and smart phones, I remember a deaf child and his entire family - no one in the entire family would learn sign language and they communicated by writing notes. I wonder if that family (in Mary Garrett's comment) who had all their devices had a member of the family who was deaf and no one knew sign language. Bibliophilehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07764234701385787238noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1001156153899984046.post-27697021448073125812019-05-23T17:28:16.788-04:002019-05-23T17:28:16.788-04:00I used to be Bashful Bill but after 12-15 years of...I used to be Bashful Bill but after 12-15 years of severe hearing loss I received cochlear implants and voila I turned into Chatty Cathy. It’s the assurance that I will understand what someone’s reply is that gives me confidence.Emily Damehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17477008427998115740noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1001156153899984046.post-4383251475564042122019-05-23T16:24:04.830-04:002019-05-23T16:24:04.830-04:00Not sure where I got this quote, but liked it well...Not sure where I got this quote, but liked it well enough to write it down..."Ten years ago, people kept their mobile phone in their pocket. Now, they hold them permanently in their hand like a small angry animal, gazing crossly into our faces, in apparent need of constant placation."Eliecehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02626727999576005484noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1001156153899984046.post-67484029965773803722019-05-23T16:21:39.875-04:002019-05-23T16:21:39.875-04:00How lovely, Rick, that you found your perfect part...How lovely, Rick, that you found your perfect partner. Karen in Ohiohttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18002794561817071780noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1001156153899984046.post-77455854205696661172019-05-23T16:20:43.941-04:002019-05-23T16:20:43.941-04:00But she says them so well. But she says them so well. Karen in Ohiohttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18002794561817071780noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1001156153899984046.post-40538497581784310272019-05-23T16:19:25.114-04:002019-05-23T16:19:25.114-04:00My condolences as well, Margie. What you have bee...My condolences as well, Margie. What you have been through over the past 2.5 years counts as trauma, so be kind to yourself, but getting out and getting out of your own head is definitely important. I began volunteering as a mentor at a high school full of kids who reminded me of me at that age. Interacting with them was tremendously rewarding and therapeutic. You have all my sympathy on the preparation for moving. I still find it mentally and emotionally exhausting to go through old stuff and sort the keepers from the tossers. Hugs to you, and keep on slogging forward. You'll get to a better place eventually.Gigi Norwoodhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00495357787099352860noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1001156153899984046.post-41222991014505269112019-05-23T14:58:38.642-04:002019-05-23T14:58:38.642-04:00Yes, indeed it is . . . .Yes, indeed it is . . . .Joan Emersonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06810313925049108163noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1001156153899984046.post-30427507343071572912019-05-23T14:40:14.569-04:002019-05-23T14:40:14.569-04:00Julia, I'm sure if Bouchercon ever gets persua...Julia, I'm sure if Bouchercon ever gets persuaded to go to Boston there'll be plenty of spaces to choose from.Jay Robertshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11409350742317719903noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1001156153899984046.post-65972853274504820922019-05-23T14:35:02.497-04:002019-05-23T14:35:02.497-04:00Julia, that works!Julia, that works!Jay Robertshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11409350742317719903noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1001156153899984046.post-18101370287877652012019-05-23T14:31:58.521-04:002019-05-23T14:31:58.521-04:00I’m definitely the Bashful Bill type. It makes me ...I’m definitely the Bashful Bill type. It makes me a really good listener, but I do try to avoid non-family parties. Some people get it; others tell me “you SHOULD go, anyway” even after I explain it’s just not my thing. And when someone says to me later “you missed a really good party!”! I know that I did NOT! I don’t mind conversing with two or three people I know well, but I hate having to look for strangers who might be willing to talk with me! A couple of friends who are very much like me have had my experience of approaching people and saying “hello” and having them smile and then turn away from us! (And we all bathe regularly; gee!) <br /><br />I have wanted to attend Malice or Bcon but I know that I would be too intimidated. I enjoy reading about these events by people who did go.<br /><br />By the way, my dad was one of those gabby, “never met a stranger” folks. If I didn’t look so much like him (And have all his orthopedic issues :-) I would think we’re not related!!<br /><br />DebRo <br /><br />Deb Romanohttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01650858888197217258noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1001156153899984046.post-6081551607940404052019-05-23T14:23:29.167-04:002019-05-23T14:23:29.167-04:00Thanks for the hugs, Julia. The sneaky side me wil...Thanks for the hugs, Julia. The sneaky side me will confess that one does get to see some of the marvelous things from those corners...Deana Dalehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09093854261937772980noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1001156153899984046.post-74638428161993069662019-05-23T14:08:44.199-04:002019-05-23T14:08:44.199-04:00Thank you, Julia. I know you have been through it ...Thank you, Julia. I know you have been through it as well, so it is wonderful to hear your recommendations. I'm fortunate to have a Toastmasters meeting once a week, so that's automatic. But I do try to schedule lunches as often as I can (I think I need to do better). And I am trying out a new book club this weekend and have attended the Barnes & Noble book club just to be around others. <br /><br />You're right about how I feel, though. The first three months or so went by in a blur because I had lots of paperwork, meetings, etc. to take care of. Now I find my emotions are closer to the surface--it doesn't take more than a Facebook animal or baby video or one particular American Idol contestant's song to make me mist up. I keep busy with projects during the daytime, but evenings can be a challenge. <br /><br />In the meantime, I'm determined to get my house ready to sell next year, so I can move closer to my grandchildren. It's amazing what I've found so far (Star Wars fan club folders, Cabbage Patch "birth certificates," things my husband had stashed away, etc.)<br /><br />And, of course, I love to read the Reds blog every day, in addition to Lesa Holstine's blog. Please keep them coming!<br /><br />Margie Buntinghttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10120666616254809025noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1001156153899984046.post-51842418817486208492019-05-23T13:38:03.353-04:002019-05-23T13:38:03.353-04:00Oh, Deana, I'm sending you virtual hugs. If we...Oh, Deana, I'm sending you virtual hugs. If we were at a social event together I'd come and sit in the corner with you - I've found it's often the quiet people who aren't "out there" who have the most interesting things to say!Juliahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09553268569509053159noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1001156153899984046.post-40223555455633628242019-05-23T13:35:31.559-04:002019-05-23T13:35:31.559-04:00Pat, one of the nice things about Bouchercon is th...Pat, one of the nice things about Bouchercon is that IF it's in a good location, there are always plenty of nooks and crannies with seating for two or four or six, so you can have interesting, quiet conversations. I qualify this by saying "if it's in a good location," because it's all up to the hotel/conference space the organizers have chosen. Albany was not great with break-out spaces, and the infamous Las Vegas Bcon of '03 was the WORST. On the other hand, the most recent one, at the Vinoy Renaissance in St. Petersburg, had every kind of small group seating you cold wish for. <br /><br />So you should do fine. And remember, no one is surprised if you disappear at any time for some quiet time in your room! Mid-afternoon naps are all that keep some of us going during Bcon.Juliahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09553268569509053159noreply@blogger.com