tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1001156153899984046.post7674464683424286894..comments2024-03-29T08:27:25.228-04:00Comments on Jungle Red Writers: What we're writing: Hallie's presses RESTART... againJungle Red Writershttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16646429819267618412noreply@blogger.comBlogger18125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1001156153899984046.post-20284591694466772862014-11-11T00:00:03.991-05:002014-11-11T00:00:03.991-05:00Hallie, I liked both versions of your story althou...Hallie, I liked both versions of your story although I think the edgy tone of the new opening tends to “grab” the reader a bit more. <br />Perhaps restart is a good thing if it brings you to a place of satisfaction with your writing. <br />In any event, I look forward to reading the book . . . .Joan Emersonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06810313925049108163noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1001156153899984046.post-22779336574785423482014-11-10T13:46:49.248-05:002014-11-10T13:46:49.248-05:00Kathy Reel - you got that right, I don't know ...Kathy Reel - you got that right, I don't know what I'd do without my writer friends: Jungle Reds and BEYOND!Hallie Ephronhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04759439029582054503noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1001156153899984046.post-28072897520558965012014-11-10T13:46:02.491-05:002014-11-10T13:46:02.491-05:00Lisa Albert: Oh, have I ever been there. My ending...Lisa Albert: Oh, have I ever been there. My endings usually get reimagined several times before I figure out who REALLY did it, and how and why, and then I have to go back and make it all work.Hallie Ephronhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04759439029582054503noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1001156153899984046.post-34217630978684834512014-11-10T13:35:50.324-05:002014-11-10T13:35:50.324-05:00Night Night, Sleep Tight is on my new books list t...Night Night, Sleep Tight is on my new books list to watch for and buy. The short story will be such a great teaser for it. I actually like both openings, but I think the newer one will give us that great photographer's eye for detail look at the whole scene. I loved the description he used at the end, Gone with the Wind meets Giant! That alone tells us that we are in for some great observation and story. <br /><br />I think it's so beneficial for writer to have close relationships with other writers, who will step in and offer constructive criticism when asked. Hank is certainly an awesome author to have in your corner. <br /><br />Kathy Reelhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17004247271452356577noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1001156153899984046.post-35093003671935872022014-11-10T13:27:34.337-05:002014-11-10T13:27:34.337-05:00Thanks for sharing this, Hallie. The new start gra...Thanks for sharing this, Hallie. The new start grabs me more--it's edgier.<br /><br />Restart-city, right here. In fact, I'm revising novel #2 and am having scary thoughts that I have the wrong villain. ARGH!Lisa Alberhttp://www.lisaalber.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1001156153899984046.post-18415941191442601872014-11-10T13:25:45.668-05:002014-11-10T13:25:45.668-05:00Hey, they're both good. But the version you ca...Hey, they're both good. But the version you can work with will wind up being the best. Whoa, all those w's. On a funny note, my 94 year old mother started receiving Seventeen magazine out of the blue. She doesn't want it, nor do I after looking through one issue. As long as someone else pays for it!Pat Dnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1001156153899984046.post-70783412870730340322014-11-10T12:33:30.816-05:002014-11-10T12:33:30.816-05:00Sharon, you're reminding me that we should dev...Sharon, you're reminding me that we should devote a blog to exactly that... the magazines we all used to be addicted to. Teen. Seventeen. Photoplay... back then I recognized all the young stars.Hallie Ephronhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04759439029582054503noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1001156153899984046.post-77889095509077541342014-11-10T12:10:53.139-05:002014-11-10T12:10:53.139-05:00Hi Hallie -
I like both Hank's recommendation...Hi Hallie -<br /><br />I like both Hank's recommendation and the way you implemented it. An outsider's view works well for this situation, and the fact that you chose the viewpoint of a photographer for the story makes sense. Duane has a reason to be there and knowledge of the world in which the events occur. <br /><br />Even the title "Photoplay" helps to evoke that time period for me. <i>Photoplay</i> was the first grown-up magazine I had my own subscription to back in the 6th or 7th grade. SharonTXnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1001156153899984046.post-57503729144612698832014-11-10T11:57:10.756-05:002014-11-10T11:57:10.756-05:00Restart: Just another day in the office. -- Pat Ma...Restart: Just another day in the office. -- Pat Marinelli<br /><br />Here here to that.Hallie Ephronhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04759439029582054503noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1001156153899984046.post-42050432875272621432014-11-10T10:13:11.152-05:002014-11-10T10:13:11.152-05:00Great opening, Hallie. I like sleazy Duane huffin...Great opening, Hallie. I like sleazy Duane huffing and puffing. Sorry. I didn't get to read the first opening.<br /><br />As for the restart, it is both a dirty word and another day at the office. I hate when I have to do it and it happens more than not. But as writers we must make the story work, so it is just another day at the office. Writing is rewriting, but I do love it when a short story flows out perfectly. I’ve only had it happen twice that I can remember. LOL<br />Pat Marinellinoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1001156153899984046.post-70354044207462587162014-11-10T09:48:08.087-05:002014-11-10T09:48:08.087-05:00Actually, I love both those versions Hallie, which...Actually, I love both those versions Hallie, which bodes well for the book. I can't wait to read this one too! And yay Hank, for the assist.Lucy Burdette aka Roberta Isleibhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04660402177299546055noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1001156153899984046.post-50408527382605755972014-11-10T09:33:56.927-05:002014-11-10T09:33:56.927-05:00You guys are so kind!
I know not all writers get...You guys are so kind! <br /><br />I know not all writers get it wrong (a few times) before they get it right... but I'm certainly one of them!<br /><br />Hallie Ephronhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04759439029582054503noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1001156153899984046.post-55076707105676614442014-11-10T09:26:50.273-05:002014-11-10T09:26:50.273-05:00Ooooh Hallie, I got goosebumps reading version #2 ...Ooooh Hallie, I got goosebumps reading version #2 -- now I want to read the whole thing!Susan Elia MacNealhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00349842866995778987noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1001156153899984046.post-33572679629010469762014-11-10T09:23:57.818-05:002014-11-10T09:23:57.818-05:00I used to groan at restarting. Then I wrote my sec...I used to groan at restarting. Then I wrote my second "real" novel. By the time I was done (or what I thought was done), I'd thrown out probably 60% of it. When I thought I was really done, I wound up cutting 15,000 words and adding 19,000 new ones. Trust me when I say the 7th draft doesn't look <b>anything</b> like the first one.<br /><br />And yes, having a good friend to say, "Try this" makes it easier. I had the good fortune to be asked to join an awesome critique group that is great for that.<br /><br />And yes, I want to read the book - and the story!Liz Millironhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04919409969263609919noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1001156153899984046.post-64996192590035268452014-11-10T08:59:46.579-05:002014-11-10T08:59:46.579-05:00YAY! xoxoYAY! xoxoHank Phillippi Ryanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17420701704169428286noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1001156153899984046.post-3499084372738176802014-11-10T08:45:17.366-05:002014-11-10T08:45:17.366-05:00I AM dying to read the book. Have been since you ...I AM dying to read the book. Have been since you first told us about it, and now your short story too. Restart is a word I used to dislike a lot. Now - I've finally come to believe it's a very real part of the process and probably the most important. At least that's what I'm telling myself since I totally scratched several thousand words and started from word one. Again. But like you, keeping some of those darlings that are too perfect to part with. And "receding chorus line of sparkling crystal, wall-mounted sconces" rocks! <br /> <br /><br /><br /><br />Kaye Wilkinson Barley - Meanderings and Museshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07486129009717476920noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1001156153899984046.post-16711393288940250022014-11-10T08:13:32.129-05:002014-11-10T08:13:32.129-05:00Restart is when your 'writer's voice' ...Restart is when your 'writer's voice' gives you a kick in the seat of the pants--and you grit your teeth, ditch what you've written and try yet again to get it right.<br /><br />And it doesn't hurt nearly so much when you've got friends like Hank to point you along your way!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1001156153899984046.post-18713825415817143302014-11-10T06:44:10.027-05:002014-11-10T06:44:10.027-05:00Driveway/driveway.
But it is much stronger.Driveway/driveway.<br /><br />But it is much stronger.Ellen Kozaknoreply@blogger.com