It's the Bling, Dahlings!

RHYS BOWEN:  As many of you know, I just returned home from six weeks in Europe. During that time I taught a workshop in Tuscany, did research in the South of France and was feted by my Amazon team in London. As I unpacked a small cloth bag tumbled onto the floor. It was the jewelry that I had taken with me on the trip. And I realized, to my mortification, that I HADN'T WORN IT ONCE. Not even changed my earrings. I always travel wearing a simple ring that can't get caught handling luggage, a gold chain around my neck and a tennis bracelet my mother gave me. But I hadn't touched anything else.  We had gone out for fancy dinners in Tuscany. I had dressed up to meet the Amazon crowd. We had taken my sister and brother-in-law out to dinner. Yet no jewelry!



It's not that I don't like jewelry. I love looking at it in my jewelry case, trying it on sometimes. And I like to look good. I'm sure I wore nice outfits and maybe a scarf on all those occasions. It's just that I never think of jewelry unless it's a fancy evening affair. I did buy a new necklace and bracelet for the Edgars this year! So I'm a failure in the jewelry department. I guess I'm actually an all around failure in the accessory department. My mother loved purses. She had purses to match every outfit and she changed them regularly. I change my about twice a year--a dark purse for winter, a bright purse for summer. I had an elderly friend who wore matching jewelry with every outfit--earrings, necklace, bracelet, the lot!

I tell myself it's because I'm always in a hurry, with three million things to do that I don't take time to go through my jewelry box. But it reality I have to confess that I'm just not a blingy sort of person. So I'm intrigued to know about my fellow Reds (who always look so put-together when I see them). Do you wear jewelry all the time? On special occasions? Jewelry to match your outfit? And how about purses? Do you change to match what you are wearing? Am I the only boring Red?

JULIA SPENCER-FLEMING: I am evermore not a blingy person. A combination of natural tendencies, being raised by a mom who was of the "Take one thing off before you leave the house" persuasion, and thirty years of living in Maine. Maine is not a blingy place. We won't say it where you can hear us, but if you're wearing jewelry on the beach, we make fun of you.

I am the queen of handbags, though. I have dozens and dozens, none of which I've been carrying this year as I am in mourning. But when I'm NOT shrouded in black, I love to switch up purses every day to match my outfit. Unfortunately, that doesn't fly when I travel (pun intended) so if you only ever see me at Bcon or Malice or some other conference, you won't be able to appreciate the splendour of my bag coordination.


HANK PHILLIPPI RYAN: One of my favorite stories. Two days after I met Jonathan, we were walking down the street in Nantucket. And he said, unbidden, "What kind of jewelry do you like?" I stopped in my tracks.
"Excuse me," I said. "I have to call my mom."
That said, I wear the same jewelry every day, essentially.  Pearls, almost every day to work. And bracelets, and rings.  I don't have pierced ears, but I wear clip ons, which I am always losing, so sometimes they don't match. But, whatever. I have other bling, very nice, but sometimes I forget, even though I love it.
Handbags. I call them purses. I have too many, but I carry the same one all the time. And every time I make myself switch them up, change, I forget to move something, and I regret it.
Let's not talk about shoes.   (RHYS: My husband John has been known to take pictures of Hank's shoes, because he is so fascinated with them. I'm trying to put my hands on one of those pictures!_

LUCY BURDETTE: Not a wink of bling here either. I have one purse, it's a Baggalini and I use it with everything. (thoough this is the bag I was carrying when my passport disappeared, eek.) I became allergic to my pierced ears some years back, so I can no longer wear my favorite earrings. I will wear a necklace for dress-up but I don't like the feel of watches or necklaces. I had to remind myself of this last week at a craft show when I was very tempted by a bracelet made out of a spoon. So Cute! I remembered at the last minute that I wouldn't wear it, so saved myself forty bucks:)

INGRID THOFT:: I’m going to buck the JRW trend!  I love jewelry and wear it every day.  I favor small, delicate necklaces, but I’m rarely without some kind of necklace in addition to my wedding and anniversary rings, and earrings.  I love hoop earrings since they go with everything, but I also have things like glass studs from Pike Place Market and a dangly pair from El Rastro street market in Madrid.  One of my favorite necklaces was a gift from my mom upon the release of LOYALTY.  She had a necklace made with some glass beads in my favorite colors and a tiny book cover engraved with LOYALTY on the front and my name on the back.  She even had matching earrings made! The only jewelry I don’t like is bracelets, not because they aren’t lovely, but they get in the way when I type!

JENN McKINLAY: I firmly believe diamonds really are a girl’s best friend. I love jewelry and have too much and wear it all the time. I have three holes in each ear just so I can wear more. It’s ridiculous.

DEBORAH CROMBIE: I am allergic to nickel, the alloy in gold jewelry, so my bling options have always been limited That rules out most really expensive jewelry right off the bat. My only diamonds are the little chips in my white gold wedding band, which I can wear, thank goodness. My ears have been pierced since I was fourteen, and I adore earrings. I can wear sterling silver, titanium, and some very good hypoallergenic costume things. (Chico's is the best I've ever found for hypoallergenic jewelry, if anyone else has these issues.)  I love bracelets, too, when I can find them to fit my little wrist, and a couple of years ago Rick found me a titanium watch--the first nice watch I've ever owned, because bands and buckles always made me break out!

I do not have the purse gene, or the shoe gene, as my daughter and my more fashionista friends will be happy to confirm.

RHYS: I have been going through my pictures and find that I do occasionally dress up and wear jewelry!

But more often if I have to look smart I wear a scarf. I do have an awful lot of scarves... so I guess we all have our secret vices, be it shoes, handbags, or bling!

How about you, dear readers? Who wears matching jewelry with every outfit? Who changes their purse to match their shoes? Who loves bling?

Picky about our purses

HALLIE EPHRON: Yesterday’s blog got me thinking about the purses I’ve known and loved. When I was in high school I carried a clutch purse. In retrospect, a dumb idea. It tied up one of your hands. But that was before women’s lib.

Every spring I went to the straw store at the Farmer’s Market in Los Angeles where for about $3 you could get a straw bag became my summer-purse-and-beach-bag. In college it was your basic Greek woven shoulder tote. It was the 60s.

Then there was the year I set my heart on a red leather purse and spent months trying to find the perfect one. I had one criteria. It had to be gorgeous. I finally bought one, used it for a few months, and now it lives on the floor of my closet.

Now, when I buy a purse, I’m picky picky picky. It has to be lightweight and compartmented -- I do not want to turn into one of those old ladies in the supermarket who are searching for change in the bottom of their purse. And I want to be able to walk a mile without noticing that I’m carrying it.

My bag needs:
-    A long, adjustable shoulder strap so I can wear it across my body
-    A compartment for credit cards
-    A compartment for my cell phone
-    Room for my wallet and hairbrush
-    To be washable
-    To be small enough so I can stuff it into one of my carry-on bags as I scoot through TSA checkpoints

It cannot:
-    Be large
-    Be heavy
-    Make noise
-    Have shiny grommets or nail heads
-    Sport fringe
-    Smell
-    Require that I use a hand to carry it
-    Close with a magnet (screws up credit cards)

What are your criteria for the perfect purse?

RHYS BOWEN: Hallie, I have exactly your perfect purse for traveling around here in Europe. It has various compartments that can be locked. It is super light. It has a strap with a steel cable through it so it cannot be cut through. Perfect. Also incredibly boring.

I love fun purses. I tend to buy them on impulse, like the one I bought I Morocco of local leather that smelled disgusting but was an interesting orange color. And the timing on this is amazing because today I bought a lovely purse at the local market... Soft Italian leather and such a fun color. I don't know what it will go with, but who cares!

SUSAN ELIA MACNEAL: Hallie, when you said red purse, I immediately thought of "the girl with the red purse" in Jerome Robbins's ballet, "Fancy Free." (Shameless name-dropping, the costumes for "Fancy Free" were designed by a man named Kermit Love, who also designed Muppets for the Jim Henson company and was Noel's mentor back in the day.)

The thing is, I've found the perfect bag (basically all of Hallie's criteria plus canvas or fabric because I'm trying to use less leather — also, it's lighter!). It was a collaboration between British handbag designer Lulu Guinness and New York artist John Derian. (I not only have this bag, I have one of the big ones, a really tiny one, and a satin evening bag (all thanks to eBay).

The sad thing is it was a limited edition, so when it goes (and I love to use it), it's just done for.... Ah, the search for the perfect bag is never-ending....

LUCY BURDETTE: As Pat K knows, my bag is TRAGIC too--the exact same faded animal print in a Baggalini. This is the closest I can come to Hallie's criteria, as I no longer own a wallet either, and cannot be bothered to change bags with outfits. And yes, it must squeeze into a backpack so it doesn't count as a carry-on. I do worry that it doesn't have a metal component like Rhys's to deter purse-snatchers.

I said I don't change bags, but if I'm going somewhere fancy (like a wedding we are attending this summer), the tragic Baggalini won't do. I went hunting for one I found years ago in a vintage store. Sadly, the whole thing had begun to disintegrate into white flecks. But isn't it cute?

HANK PHILLIPPI RYAN:  Rhys, you can get rid of that bad smell by putting a little gauze or cheesecloth bag of coffee beans in the purse, or dusting the inside with baking soda. Or both. Really works! Takes a few days, though.

OH, I have too many purses. One SO gorgeously irresistibly red and black but SO expensive I was mortified for buying it, and finally amortized it by carrying it every day.  But now I do have a pretty perfect purse. Light, and compartmentalized, and some zippered pockets, and lots of pouches, and waterproof. It collapses right into my tote bag so I can get it past TSA as one thing.   It's black, that travel fabric, you know? With hot pink waterproof lining. Sound great? Ha. Do not tell. It is a Kate Spade...diaper bag! See?

JULIA SPENCER-FLEMING: Susan, that's delightful! And Hank, don't feel bad. My absolutely perfect laptop bag for years (until I got a larger machine that wouldn't fit) was a Coach diaper bag. Black fabric, leather trim, and it looked sleek even with lots and lots of pockets and compartments. "NYC Professional Mom" diaper bags are clearly an underutilized resource.

I am a confessed purse junkie, so I don't have a perfect bag. I can change mine out five times a week to go with any particular day's outfit. I love great big ones; I tend to solve the rooting-around-for-buried-treasure issue by putting stuff in still smaller bags: one for make-up, one for phone, one for pens, etc.

The object I am picky about is my wallet. I want a compartment for bills, one for receipts, easy-to-access cards and a separate change purse. Oh, and not too expensive and something cheerful that I enjoy seeing when I pull it open to spend my money.

My go-to is the Vera Bradley trifold wallet. I like Vera Bradley for accessories and travel bags - they're cute, wear very well and are eye-catching, whether you've left a duffel on the luggage carousel or - oops! - your wallet on the checkout counter.

Here's my current wallet. They've changed the design a bit on the inside for the latest model, but it still has everything I need.

DEBORAH CROMBIE: I've had the Baggalinni. Or something similar, from Travelsmith. Lightweight, cross-body strap, washable, black, many compartments. And so...tragic. My go-to bags the last couple of years have been Fossils. I have two, one deep burgundy, the other pale blue. Nice leather, outside pocket for keys, inside pockets for phone, etc,, and a zip inside pocket. And the whole bag zips across the top, which is an absolute essential for traveling. No braids, no bangles!

I do like carrying a small bag when doing a lot of walking, but for my usual in-and-out of car lifestyle, I like a bag that will hold a notebook and a book, and whatever else I might need to stick in it. I don't have loose stuff, just a wallet and a zipped makeup bag, so it's not hard to find things. Oh, and it's structured enough to set down on things, another big requirement.I have been coveting my daughter's diaper bag, however. It's custom made by a company called Better Life Bags. Check them out! I want one of these amazing bags. Or maybe two, one big enough to hold my laptop and a smaller one. 

HALLIE: So what are your requirements in a purse of wallet? Did you ever consider looking at diaper bags for your next one?

As a going-way present, here's a Birkin diamond bag that that just sold for $300,000 at auction. A white Himalaya crocodile gave its life so that Kim Kardashian could carry one. 


And! Here's Ann's Dias de Las Muertas clutch... I want one.

And here's Karen's tote that she made herself? How is that even possible?

And here's Joan Emerson's fabulous vintage Lucite bags. The brown one she wears every day. Wow.

 

The House of Seven Teapots

RHYS: My mother collected purses. She had purses in every shape, color, fabric and brand. A purse to match any outfit or occasion. I must have been a miserable failure as a daughter as I tend to buy one purse I like and use it until it starts to look old and worn. Currently I have a bronze leather cross body bag with enough pockets for everything.  I also have a brilliant purse for travel which is safe from pick pockets, identity thieves etc.  A little evening purse when needed. But that’s about it.
    I had a friend who wore matching earrings and necklace with every outfit. Again I’m a hopeless case as I tend to put in a pair of gold hoops and wear them for months. So I’m trying to think—do I have a weakness, something unnecessary that I have to have in large numbers? Well books. I also like pretty sandals. But no more than necessary. I guess I was born sensible.

    My husband, on the other hand, is constantly in pursuit of the perfect cup of tea. He buys different teas and blends them—a little more Ceylon here, a little more Darjeeling there. Even a dash of Chinese Keemun for the smoky flavor.And to make this tea to perfection he buys teapots. At this moment we have seven teapots in our California  house, not to mention at least three in Arizona. (The two silver teapots are stowed away, wrapped in baize, for ceremonial occasions).  Not one, apparently, produces the perfect cup of tea yet so we are still on a quest every time we are in England.
    So I’m curious, Reds, where is your weakness? What do you collect more of than you need? (I’m sure Hank will say she needs all those black suits and high heeled

HANK PHILLIPPI RYAN: I NEED all those black suits and high heels.  (Rhys is ALWAYS right!)  But you know what I also have too many of? WAAAAY too many of?  Paper bags. Shiny glossy paper shopping bags.  It is RIDICULOUS. But I cannot bring my self to throw them away.

Oh, and T-shirts. Here's one--what do you vote, toss or keep? And then I have about a million others for you to vote on. (I'll do a blog about them next time.)



LUCY BURDETTE: Aside from books, which you saw very plainly last week, my weakness has to be shoes. Not fancy shoes, with elegant heels, but sturdy shoes that accept my orthotics. And sandals--mostly Mephisto--because I can walk anywhere in them. I panic if my Asolo clunkers are starting to wear down and I don't have a pair in reserve because these are what keep my chronic plantar fasciitis at bay.

What makes this worse is I don't throw away any of the shoes I used to be able to wear. Here are the ones I wore to my first wedding, back in 1979.

SUSAN ELIA MACNEAL: We have limited space for stuff, so we tend to live pretty simply. (Well, the kiddo does not live simply — but that's a whole other post...) My husband, however, is a collector of puppets. We have a bunch of Bil Baird originals, as well as puppets from Thailand, Bali, Nigeria, and India. I also love street art/outsider art and have started collecting original Faile (faile.net) and Stucky (http://stuckyart.bigcartel.com/) pieces. They go with the puppets! 

In terms of our bar, I love collecting really odd bottles — creme de violette, yellow chartreuse, velvet falernum. Our bar looks like it's set up for a Potions Class at Hogwarts!

 

 RHYS: Potions class at Hogwarts! Love it. So would my grandkids. Potions are a specialty of theirs.

JULIA SPENCER-FLEMING: Your mother and I are kindred spirits, Rhys. For me, it's handbags. I cannot resist. I love buttery, elegant leather bags, colorful quilted bags, funky vintage bags. I get them everywhere from high-end boutiques to Goodwill. I'm rigorous about clothing: if I don't wear something within a season, out it goes, but I will keep my purses and satchels and clutches forever, even if I only carry one once a year. Here's a picture of my overloaded vanity, which has become purse central - and keep in mind, I also have them stored above my chest of drawers and on the top shelf of Youngest's closet (if she starts collecting bags too, we'll be in trouble.)

RHYS: Julia, we have a six bedroom house and have now stared things in all the former kids' closets (mainly John's file boxes, but also clothes, craft materials etc).

DEBORAH CROMBIE:  My daughter laments that I do not have the shoe gene...  Like Lucy, I have developed plantar faciitis--mine is in my left foot. But I have held on to shoes with heels that I cannot wear for years.  A couple of weeks ago I girded my loins and gave them all to Goodwill. No handbag thing, either. Like Rhys, I tend to buy one and carry it until it wears out. I might get really wild and have one for summer and one for winter!

Things I do accumulate? Art. There is not a blank wall in my house. I've collected London Transport posters for years, and many are now very collectible. But I CANNOT buy any more. There is no place to put them.

And Rhys knows about the teapot fetish.  I just did a rough count in my head.... I have at least a dozen, maybe fifteen.  And I have this last year found THE PERFECT TEAPOT. They are made by Emma Bridgewater in the UK (if you are tempted to order one, wait until they do a special with 10 pound shipping to the US. By the time take they off the VAT, your shipping will be free.) So I now have two of them, and salivate over the catalog. Why do I need more teapots????  Why do we need anything that's not absolutely necessary?

Because they're beautiful and it makes me happy to use them and to look at them.

Just don't get me started on tea...

RHYS: So we've shared our strange obsessions. Now it's time to share yours. Who collects way too many of what item?
(And Hank, that NBC shirt from the 1980 Olympics in Moscow. Wow, that's certainly a collectors item! Worth putting on eBay and then buying more shoes!

Bag Lady

 Announcing the winners of this week's book giveaways! ARCs of THROUGH THE EVIL DAYS: Jack Getze, Gram, Reine, Jamie Freveletti, Karen in Ohio, Judy in Owego, Lynda and Marianne in Maine. TROUBLED DAUGHTERS, TWISTED WIVES: Lisa Alger and Mary Sutton. 

Please send an email with your mailing address to julia at juliaspencerfleming dot com. Congratulations!

 
JULIA SPENCER-FLEMING:  There are two types of women in the world: shoe women, and handbag women. I am firmly in the latter camp, making me, I suppose, a bag lady. I certainly own enough to fill a shopping cart to overflowing.

I'm not sure what causes the great divide. In my case, I suspect it comes fom having extra-extra wide feet and impossibly high arches. Finding great shoes was just too much of a chore. Buy great bags - why those are everywhere. On Ebay. At yard sales. In consignment stores and designer outlets and marked down at the end of the season at Macy's.

I can't recall any of my bags before I started my first job in D.C., but I remember going to the now-defunct Woodward & Lothrop to get my first serious, grown up purse. It was a small Coach mailflap style in British Tan. Oh, how I loved that bag. It was the first of several Coach purses and totes I've collected over the years. I still have it, although it's been sadly battered and stained over the decades.

(It was a great disappointment to me when Coach stopped making simple, classic leather satchels and started selling bags designed for sixteen-year-old mall rats.)

I don't keep all the purses I've bought over the years - I'd need an extra bedroom for those. Some are very much of their time: There was that suede mauve-and-gray clutch that was more 80's that a Debbie Harry record. Or the one I got when I mistakenly bought into the early 00's studded look - I could have used that one as a weapon in a motorcycle bar fight. But I do have several dozen at this point: leather and straw, quilted cotton and wool, satchels and shoulderbags and totes and clutches.

My husband and youngest daughter and I went to the movies last night, and I came downstairs ready for our date looking, if I do say so myself, rather fine. "How do I look?" I asked (because you do, don't you?)

"You're always so pulled together," my husband said.

"That's because I always have the right bag for the outfit."

"You do, yes." He frowned, perhaps thinking of the overflow of purses taking up large sections of our bedroom. "I didn't know that about you when I asked you to marry me."

Thankfully, he didn't speculate on what he would have done had he known about my bag lady tendencies. How about you, dear readers? Do you have the perfect bag? One you can't live without?