Wednesday, October 25, 2023

Julia Versus The Woodpile

JULIA SPENCER-FLEMING: We’ve been talking a lot about fall these past weeks (no surprise) and I’ve mentioned in passing one of my biggest seasonal chores: The Woodpile. My relationship with my woodpile is like that with a temperamental and demanding beau; requiring excellent timing, care, and regular daily attendance.

 

The first appearance of The Woodpile is in August, when I order two cords of unseasoned wood. For those of you who don’t heat with large vegetable cellulose, ‘unseasoned’ means the split logs have been cut less than five months ago. I buy unseasoned because it saves me around a hundred bucks and I have a large enough area between my barn and driveway that I can comfortably let an enormous pile o’ wood sit around untouched for a few months. As to the two cords, the actual measurement is  4'x8'x2'8", but my photos will give you a better idea. It’s simultaneously a WHOLE lot and, by the end of February, barely enough.

 

The wood sits basking in the late summer and early autumn sun for a few months; then the ‘timing’ portion of the job kicks in. In the first months, there’s no need for me to leap and caper about trying to cover its vast bulk with tarps whenever it rains. It has plenty of time to get damp and dry out again. And I never want to rush getting it down to my wood room, since there’s less air and more unidentified small mammals circulating down there, and very little light. (Back when the kids were small, Ross kept them out of the place by telling them there was a witch lurking down there. I didn’t entirely approve, but if there was a witch anywhere on the property, a semi-underground space braced against a crumbling stone wall would be it.)

 

So I like to let The Woodpile season as long as possible aboveground. However! It then becomes a race: me and my little wheelbarrow against the coming November rains and the inevitable snowfall. Right around the last week or two of October, I begin my work, armed with the aforementioned wheelbarrow, deerskin work gloves, a can-do attitude and several episodes of the Fall of Civilizations podcast loaded on my phone. (There’s nothing like hearing about the utter failure of the early Greenland colony to make you feel better about endless manual labor.)

 

This is supposed to be the final form.

I personally think it would make a great reality series: can one woman of a certain age get two cords stacked in the wood room before the snow flies? Well, maybe it would be better as a video game. Add points for every wheelbarrow load that goes down into the sort-of-subterranean depths,  and for every LL Bean tote full that gets stacked indoors. Extra fun deciding which stove or fireplace to set the logs next to! Deduct points for 1) straining muscles 2) splinters 3) accidentally dropping the wood and terrifying the poor dogs.

 

Around this time, I start getting obsessive about the weather. I buy two new tarps and if Weather.gov even hints at rain, I spread them over the wood like a mother tucking in a large and unwieldy child. (Unless I forget to check, and I see it start to rain while sitting at my desk and have to race out to do the job. Better me getting wet than the firewood.) Snow is also a real worry, but the worst is having some of the outdoor pile remaining when we get icy rain. Snow, you can brush off. Ice means defrosting individual logs indoors - which means about eight pieces of wood per day. 


Despite the undeniable drawbacks, I keep hauling and stacking year after year. Why? Well, unlike most of you reading this, my house is heated with fuel oil (play The Beverly Hillbillies theme in your head right now) and wood is a LOT cheaper than black gold. Also, my routine makes for a heck of a workout. No trips to the gym or expensive gear required! And finally: there's nothing like sitting by a blazing fire - it's warmth, community (every animal draws nigh) and primal relaxation therapy all rolled into one.


How about you, dear reader? Any major chores you have to deal with year after year?

Tuesday, October 24, 2023

Well, I'll Be Croc'd

JULIA SPENCER-FLEMING: I’m not exactly the type who follows fashion news, but as I was scrolling the other day I saw something that made my eyes pop out. I had to read every word. Ladies and gentlemen, Crocs – the brand everyone loves to hate or hates to love – is making a Crocs cowboy boot.

 

A real (sort of) cowboy boot, complete with bootstraps, western stitching and little spinning spurs at the heel (don’t worry, animal friends, these are horse-friendly charms.) Of course, being Crocs, they also have ventilation holes all around the toe box; I shudder slightly to imagine what your feet or socks might look like if you actually wear these into a stable or corral. 

 

Is it a joke? Is it a meme that hopped off the internet and into stores? It’s not the first time Crocs has left some of us wondering, “Is that the most ridiculous thing I’ve ever seen, or do I not understand ‘hip’ these days?” (Full disclosure: I know I don’t understand anything cool and au courant these days. I peaked in coolness in 1985 and it’s been downhill ever since.)

 

Previously, Crocs made heads turn – or explode – with Balenciaga Croc heels. There was the Shrek Croc, in what I’m sure is a patented ogre color, with little ears. That, at least , made sense for kids. I’m pretty sure mine had branded shoes in official princess colors when they were tykes.

 

The last thing I want to do is make fun of something that’s actually far too haute couture for me to understand… but these are retailing for $120. I mean, if you want a clog, you can buy an amazing pair of Danskos for that money, and get arch support that’ll last you for an entire twelve hour hospital shift/ hike through Denver International Airport/ day browsing the farmers markets. Who has enough money to spend $120 joke – and if you have that kind of moolah, wouldn’t you pick, you know, a better joke?

 

What do you think, dear readers? Fun? Functional? F***, no? And have you ever fallen for any trends that lasted about fifteen minutes before dying?

Monday, October 23, 2023

Don't be a Ding-aLing - the New Etiquette of Phones

JULIA SPENCER-FLEMING: Phone etiquette. Remember what it was when we were kids? You answer, “Hello, Fleming residence,” and if the caller didn’t identify themselves, “May I ask who’s calling?” That was pretty much it for rules, because you just didn’t have many options. (When my dad added the brand new call-waiting service in 1978 because he was tired of the line being eternally tied up by two teenage daughters, we added another rule: when someone ‘beeped’ through, you had to get off your call and answer the next one. I think in modern terms we’d say it was a push notification service.


Now? Don’t get me started. The Washington Post and the Cut (part of The New Yorker) both recently published articles on modern phone rules. I thought I’d share some to see what you all thought.


At Home



Don’t leave a voicemail (except for bffs and fam who are always happy to hear your voice.) J: This is the one that exploded all over social media, particularly among those of us of a certain age. 


Text before calling, but no cryptic messages, ie, “We have to talk,” or “Call me now.” If there’s a specific issue you need to discuss, lay it out in the text. J: Not gonna lie, I love this. I love text because I can get back to you when it’s convenient; nowadays, an unexpected phone call feels like an intrusion. (If you’re a friend reading this, I don’t mean you.)


You don’t need to answer the phone when it rings! J: Which kind of brings up back to the answering machine days?


It’s ok to email, text or dm anyone at any hour. It’s on the recipient to manage their notifications.  J: I turn my phone off when I go to sleep, and set it on DND when I’m working.



In Public


Shine your phone flashlight discreetly in restaurants. J: I 100% agree with this. But also, restaurants, how about giving us enough light to read the damn menu? And can you turn down the music? And get off my lawn?


If you have to talk (or check something) excuse yourself from the table. Don’t start scrolling while at the table.  J: Also agree 100%.


No speakerphone convos in public. And for those of us who can only make it for about three months before losing airpod-like headphones, rejoice: plug in earbuds are back in style! J: I would also add, keep your voice down on your end while in public - unlike me. I was traveling recently, and at the airport, Youngest pointed out I used the same volume talking on my phone as I did when I was alone in my house. Ooops.


Face up and away from your phone while crossing the street. J: I’d add “And while walking in the city.” If you need entertainment from 5th Avenue to east 50th, play a podcast. With those attached earbuds! 



Friends and Family


Juicy gossip? Spilling the tea about a work incident? Always call, never text. J: This advice is approved by lawyers as well as etiquette experts.


Don’t share texts without permission. J: No screenshots, either!


Don’t text-bomb your friends! Group chats are the place for rapid-fire texting. 


Emergency? Let them know right away, don’t keep calling and texting hoping to break through. J: This feels like the one most likely to come from those of us who grew up even before answering machines, when the only way to connect was to ring and ring and ring. I remember being halfway across New York state, coming home from an audition to get into SUNY Purchase (no, I didn’t get an offer) and discovering I had lost my bus ticket. Trying to call and call from the bus station pay phone… shivers just remembering! I’ll take the modern mobile network anyday…


How about you, Reds? Anything here ring a bell?



HANK PHILLIPPI RYAN: I saw that article! SO fascinating. I can tell you, working at Channel 7, the “youngsters” absolutely would not make phone calls. Communication was via text, and email if absolutely necessary.

I’d say–just CALL the person! Call them!

That rant over, let me say I adore texting, it’s fast and semi-efficient.

Phone calls are SO efficient, especially when you make a plan via text to talk. 

But I will admit I don’t wanna answer the phone if I don’t want to. So don’t call, and then if I don’t answer, text and email to FORCE me to respond.

Hmm..”it’s on the recipient to manage their notifications.” Hmm. Sometimes I write the email on Saturday, and set it to send on Monday during working hours.

 Do we ALWAYS have to be available? NO. Do we have to assume that everyone else is always available? No.

I guess what I’m trying to say is that the new methods of communication have retrained people to expect an immediate response.  It’s sender-centered, not receiver-centered. That’s why good ol’ answering machines were so convenient. 


RHYS BOWEN:  The new phone etiquette or lack thereof drives me crazy. If I’m talking to you I don’t expect you to pull out your phone, stare at the message and decide whether it’s more important than me at this moment . I do text a lot and like the convenience of texts but I agree with Hank that the younger generation never actually speaks. They text in abbreviated slivers, never a whole grammatical sentence. They must completely lack social skills. When I was growing up we were educated in the art of conversation!


Texts any time of the day or night? Not if I have a notification that pings! I get so many texts from political candidates it makes me decide never to donate again!


As for those who answer their phones on public transport and talk loudly, I call that justifiable homicide.


DEBORAH CROMBIE: When I was a kid our phone was a business line (my parents ran their business from home,) so you bet you had to answer properly, even in off hours. After many teenage-year fights, my parents gave in and got me a separate line. Remember those??


I put my phone on DND at night. Spam calls come in at all hours!, but even so, I don’t think people should text you in the middle of night. Email is fine, though. I have voice to text on my phone so almost never actually listen to voicemail, oops.


And can I just say that smart watches are now just as bad as smart phones for distracting people’s attention from real live conversations?

 

 

 

 

JULIA: How about you, dear readers? What do you think about the new rules for telephoning?