What We're Writing--Hank's adventures in the past

HANK PHILLIPPI RYAN: Everything old is new again? Well, kind of.

When my publisher asked me to take a fresh-eyed look at my Charlotte McNally books in preparation for their re-issue—my first series in all new editions with gorgeous new covers!—I knew that could be a…shall we say, fascinating experience. I could change things if I wanted. Yay. 

But I would also see—in unassailable black and white--what needed to be changed. Would that be the good news or the bad news?

So with much delight and little trepidation, I opened the pages of the four books in my first series, and read all the way through.  PRIME TIME came out in February, and I am so happy Charlotte McNally is making friends with lots of new readers.

 FACE TIME is coming next week.  So today my “what we’re writing”

today is about “what we’ve written.”  

And then written again.

First, the fabulous news. Were you hooked on Serial, or Making A Murderer, as I was? It turns out that the Serial and Making A Murder theme is what FACE TIME is all about! So that was a treat to discover.

However. It was quite the education to see what needed to be changed in the books. It’s like watching a movie from 9 years ago. Things that seemed so timely and hip become…well, not so relevant. 

Or just—wrong.

First, in AIR TIME (coming in June) I had to change the announcement flight attendants make before takeoff. You don’t have to completely turn off your phones any more, right? You can keep them in airplane mode.  That almost ruined a plot point—it was very nice to be able to have the flight attendant yell at Charlotte to power down.

I also almost hit plot-disaster with beepers. You remember beepers, right? Those little gizmos everyone had? Especially reporters, who were not allowed to leave the station without them. Now, almost no one has a beeper. But um, rut-roh. I really needed them in the plot of one of the books.  I finessed.  Instead of Charlotte reassuring herself: “Everyone gets beeped!”  She now thinks: “It’s okay, people still get beeped.”

n PRIME TIME, someone’s computer proclaims “You’ve got mail!” Uh, hmm.  When was the last time you heard that once-constant refrain? So now I made their email ping. But a person still says “You’ve got mail.” The “you’ve got mail” reference is critical later in the book, so I couldn’t ignore it altogether.

There’s a reference, sigh, to Puff Daddy.  Charlie’s producer Franklin, corrects the speaker, reminding him it’s now P. Diddy. (Are you with me here? Of course not. And if you are, I love you madly.)

But because a suspect wears an item from his Sean John clothing line and that leads to his identification, it was a real key to the story. (You’ll understand when you read AIR TIME. It works.)   So I had to keep it—but how?

“How do you even know about P. Diddy?” someone now asks.

 “Oh, Franklin’s big on fashion history,” Charlie now says. “He knows all that vintage stuff.”

Another oops?  Someone bought a home “a few years ago in 2005.”  Now it’s simply “a few years ago.”

The crazy-crowded Cape Cod rotary is now gone. Luckily Charlie doesn’t have to use another route to be caught in the traffic jam. The toll booth on the Mass Pike are now mostly unstaffed E-Z pass automatic machines—happily for me, not ALL of them.

My editor back then yanked out all the current cultural references, much to my chagrin at the time. I remember telling her: “Jane Pauley will ALWAYS be on the Today Show!”  Okay, the editor was right. Big lesson learned.

Some things I just left the way they were—I mean, Charlie is 46, and her mental rolodex would be that of a person that age.  So she refers to the Beatles, and Ed Sullivan, and having had a collection of VHS tapes twenty years ago.

And from the “need I say more” department, here are two more snippets from the “change” list I sent for AIR TIME :

p 217  2^nd line from bottom

change

“Josh is getting cable,” I say.

To

“Josh is upgrading his cable,” I say.

P 226  Line 12-13

Change

Time to hit the pay phone.

To

Happily, Logan still has one pay phone.

And now, here’s a bit from the about to be re-issued FACE TIME, a BookSense Notable Book (see? They’re called Indie Next Picks now!), about which Sara Paretsky (hurray!) said: “A gripping fast-paced thriller with an important story line and an engaging and unusual heroine.”

In this scene: our heroine, reporter Charlotte McNally, is not only facing a last-minute TV live shot about a new political candidate, but a disaster only possible to people of a certain age.

FACE TIME

 “Just read the news release,” Franklin instructs. “It’s got the whole drill, law and order, convictions out the wazoo, death to infidels, all that. Y’all know the lowdown on this guy, right?”

I do, in fact. Oscar “Oz” Ortega: recruitment poster for the

prosecution—cool, hot, and politically connected. Known for his

outrageous neckties and outrageous legal talent. Scholarship to

Boston College. Scholarship to Yale Law. Could cross-examine

blood out of a turnip. And, some predict, he’ll step out of the attorney

general’s office, percolate for a term or two on Beacon Hill,

then head for the Oval Office at 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue.

“Thanks, Franko,” I say, taking the release. Less than a minute

to go. I’ll read it through quickly, then use it to sum up when Oz is

finished. Done it a million times. Like riding a bike. “No problem.”

Wrong.

I can’t see the words. I mean, I can see that there are words, but

they’re a complete blur. I glance over at Franklin, ready to ask if

there’s a problem with the copy he’s offered. I can easily see the

crease in his predictably impeccable jeans, the tiny polo pony on

his pink knit shirt, even how the ten- o’clock stubble on his face

darkens his coffee skin to espresso.

Clearly, what’s wrong is me. Without my reading glasses, this is

going to be impossible. And even if I could get to my glasses,

tucked in my red leather tote bag and back in the van, I couldn’t

go on the air wearing them.

“Thirty seconds,” I hear in my ear.

I can’t read this news release, but I have to. Tucking the paper

under one arm, I use a finger to pull back my left eyelid and pop

out my contact lens. With a brief wince of regret and one flip of a

finger, I discard the contact onto the parking lot pavement, and try

again to read Oz’s formal announcement.

 “Four. Three.” I hear the countdown in my ear. “Two. Go.”

HANK: SO excited about this! And soon I will have fabulous other news. And—soon--there’ll be the brand new SAY NO MORE, about which you will hear, um, relentlessly. I'm working on the updates to DRIVE TIME now…and I will keep you posted.

But let’s talk about change. If  you had a do-over—about anything—would you?  Or how about this: Would you mind if I’d mentioned the Cape Cod rotary or Jane Pauley?

 And—a copy of the all new PRIME TIME to one lucky commenter!

Cover Story--and question for you!

HANK PHILLIPPI RYAN:  I need your advice. But first, even though they tell you never to do this, a bit of back story. (The flowers, the last from our garden last fall, are just for decoration.)

I was at my desk in the newsroom a few years ago, and, by mistake, clicked open an email spam. I stared at it, baffled. What it said didn’t make sense. Then--that very instant--I had the idea for my first novel.

That night, I went home and said to my husband: "I've got it. I've know the plot of the mystery I've wanted to write ever since I was a kid.”

Jonathan thought a moment. Smiled. Then he said, “That’s terrific. But, ah, sweetheart? Do you know how to write a novel?”

Newbie me laughed, and said,  “How hard can it be?”

And I typed: Chapter 1.

I soon learned how hard it could be. Ha! But through a process of doubt and delight, the story emerged. PRIME TIME (about secret messages in email spam!) became the first in my series of suspense novels starring reporter Charlotte McNally, the funny, smart, savvy TV journalist who wonders: What happens when a TV reporter is married to her job—but the camera doesn’t love her anymore?

The first cover looked like this. 

Don’t even get me started. But my sheer joy overcame any artistic questions. 

Questions like: Why is she wearing diamond handcuffs? And who is that person, anyway? It doesn’t look like Charlie McNally at all. And what is she kissing? That’s not an Emmy, and it if were, you wouldn’t kiss it.  And if she’s in silhouette, why isn’t her dress in silhouette? 

But I said not to get me started. And I was incredibly happy, whatever. 

And it won the Agatha.

Then MIRA grabbed the series, and re-issued Charlie to much acclaim. 

That cover looks like this. 

Very of-the-time right? Dark. Body part. Don’t get me started. At least it looks like a professional body part.  And, hey, I was still SO thrilled, I didn’t care. (Forgive the bad photos. My name is actually straight.)

That was several years ago. My first thriller, THE OTHER WOMAN (with an PERFECT cover), interrupted the so-far four books in the McNally series--but now, ta-dah, Charlie’s back.

I’m so thrilled to tell you the four Charlotte McNally books will be available in all gorgeous new hardcover and trade paperback editions from Forge--starting with PRIME TIME with a new one every other month this year.

Pant, pant. Back story over. SO. FINALLY the point.

How do I tell people about this? PRIME TIME is not new, but if someone hasn’t heard of it before (and they are certainly legion), it’s new to them, right?  But it’s not calendar “new.” So what does new mean?

And when I say “Charlie’s Back” it’s cute, but it  requires, as you just saw, some explanation. 

Reds and readers, how would you handle the new/not-new marketing case study? Have you ever done this? Have you ever been angered or annoyed by buying a book you've already read? Do I treat these books as new or old or returning or back or available or--what?

And if you saw  the version of PRIME TIME in a bookstore, what would you think?

(And isn't it instructive to see all these covers?)

PS--CONTEST!   If you missed Charlie (or miss her), TIME to get acquainted!  Buy PRIME TIME in any format—and you can enter to win a $100 or $50 or $25 dollar gift certificate to the bookstore of your choice! Yes, you can enter each time you buy. Click here for to see the info, the rules, and enter to win: https://1.shortstack.com/dmSQMz

IT WAS A DARK AND STORMY NIGHT

DEBORAH CROMBIE: Recently, when my writer friend David Corbett and I were co-keynote speakers at a writer's conference, he asked me what was my favorite opening line from my books. I looked at him blankly and said, "I have no idea. Never thought about it."

So, of course, when I got home I had to pull out all fifteen novels and read the first line. And the weird thing was that while there are perhaps more lyrical and more foreboding opening lines, I kept going back to the very first book, A Share in Death.

"Duncan Kincaid's holiday began well."

So simple. Yet it introduces the protagonist, it tells you that he is going somewhere and doing something, and that the holiday does not CONTINUE to go well. Even now, I immediately want to know what happened, and why.

Fellow REDs, what are your favorite opening lines from your novels? And why?


ROSEMARY HARRIS: Fun question. "So many lies."
That's it. It's the first line from Dead Head and I guess I imagined the narrator delivering the line in an exhausted voice, wondering when she'd be able to stop telling them. I also hoped it would make the reader wonder who was lying and why.

LUCY BURDETTE: Love those lines ladies. Mine would have to be the opening from AN APPETITE FOR MURDER, which I HOPE gives an immediate taste of the narrator/protagonist. I wanted to show what she loved and how desperately she wanted it.

"Lots of people think they'd love to eat for a living. Me? I'd kill for it."

But I can't tell you how many drafts I went through before that appeared!

HALLIE EPHRON: I'm often surprised to discover that my book's opening lines really are the first ones I wrote.

It takes two lines to get There Was an Old Woman started: "Mina Yetner sat in her living room inspecting the death notices in THE DAILY NEWS. She got through two full columns before she found someone older than herself."

HANK PHILLIPPI RYAN:  You know, I can't write my books until I have the first line, and I have to say, it never changes. (Sometimes I'll tweak just because it seems like I ought to--but then it goes back to the way it started. I--embarrassed to say--love all my first lines. I see them as the entryway to the book, you know? That one line is what the book is all about, every bit of it, all the way through.

In The Other Woman--which is about the clash between cops and reporters--the first line is  a detective talking to reporters. He's saying : "Get back behind that tape. All of you. Now."

In the new  (As yet untitled, grrr) book, the first line is Jane saying:  "I know it's legal, but it's horrible."

In THE WRONG GIRL  (out this fall!) it's   "Listen Jane, I don't think she's my real mother."

But the sentimental favorite is my third book AIR TIME, which is about a scheme to smuggle valuable items via the commercial airline system. And that first line is Charlotte saying "It's never a good thing when the flight attendant is crying."

(Can I just say? See? It has character, point of view, conflict, suspense and setting, all in that line. I love thinking about this!)

RHYS BOWEN: (checking in from rainy England). I have to agree that I need to have the first line in place before I can think seriously about a new book. Sometimes it comes to me instantly. Sometimes I play with it--cut out whole paragraphs or even pages. But my favorite is definitely the first Molly Murphy book, Murphy's Law. "That mouth of yours will get you into trouble one day."

DEBS:  Oh, you all are fabulous! I love every single one of these! (We hope readers will never guess how hard we work at them...) And isn't interesting that so many of us can't start a book without a first line?

So, READERS, what is your favorite, or most memorable, opening line from novels you've read? And can you tell us what makes it stand out?