Brave New World

 RHYS BOWEN: Our recent Facebook trials when we tried to do a Facebook live event for our group REDS AND READERS highlighted how annoyingly stressful modern life can be. We all are suddenly required to be more tech savvy than we want to be. Mastering Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, not to mention Canva and learning how to create images with stars exploding all over them. Who would have thought it when I sat down with a pan and pen to write my first book?

Every time I have to do a Zoom, Streamyard, Chime etc etc I'm stressed that I won't be able to connect, that I'll freeze, that i'll suddenly notice my bra-strap is showing or I look as if I have no chin. I suppose the positive aspect of all this is that we can connect with readers in a way not possible before. I now speak to bookclubs anywhere in the world. When I do an event for the Poisoned Pen we get about 2000 watching the video , not just from America but from Australia, Sweden, you name it. It is mind boggling how one can have fans from across the globe.

But it is also so time-consuming. I reckon writers these days spend half their time writing and the other half in social media. I try to interact on Facebook every day. I post blogs, I do podcasts and interviews. On Monday I had two Zoom interviews, one after the other. Total of over 2 hours. When I went upstairs I said to John "My cheeks hurt from so much smiling." You can't look grumpy for a second on a Zoom!

So I'm thinking that Shakespeare and Jane Austen didn't have to spend half their time interacting on social media. Okay, that wasn't a good example. Shakespeare's works were performed so he was able to assess the success or failure of his words. Dickens's novels were published in weekly installments so he was also able to get feedback from his readers. but they didn't have to spend half their lives smiling on Zoom.

Of course it is lovely to meet many more readers than I ever could on bookstore visits. But it's made writing into a celebrity thing--that it's not just the words they like, it's the writer they follow. I find it strange and mind boggling that I have about 400,000 followers across social media (Facebook, Bookbub and Amazon). Did I ever, in my wildest dreams, imagine that my words would reach that many people, across the world. I should add that some of those followers are creepy guys from Nigeria, but then some are real African fans so it's hard to weed them out. (but that's why I started the private group TEA WITH RHYS as they have to be admitted and can be booted out if they do anything inappropriate).

I suppose I should be grateful and embrace the convenience. I still remember the days when the copy edits from my publisher came in a large envelope and I had to edit and reprint and send it back. Now it can be done in a day in the review mode. And I get a lot of fan mail because it doesn't require a stamp and a trip to the post office. And Google can alert me to any time my name shows up in the media. All good, but...

Maybe if I were younger I wouldn't have a hard time keeping up with technology, but it seems as soon as I've mastered one thing, something new replaces it. I'm still coming to terms with email. I'm not quite sure of the correct protocol. Should an email be considered a letter and therefor start 'Dear X?" and end with a yours sincerely etc.

Should it start like a chat with a friend? "Hi X! and end with kisses xxxxx

Or should it need not intro and conclusion at all since the recipient can see who it is coming from?

And then there is texting. Don't get me started on emojis or all of the acronyms. I haven't got past LOL yet. I can't see myself ever communicating with things like Wsg? hyd? NTG ISTG etc.

Even more baffling: 459 apparently means I love you!

39 means thank you (three and nine in Japanese apparently)

Do you think that humans are reverting to cave man speak and will lose the art of large vocabulary and polished sentences. No matter, there is always AI to do it for them. And that's another whole discussion.

So who here feels comfortable with technology and is glad of the conveniences we have? And who would like to return to the good old days when we sat down with pen and paper and wrote a letter instead?

Social Media Fatigue: Also WTH is Happening?

 JENN McKINLAY: That's it! If Chrissy Teigen can leave Twitter, so can I. So I did. Last week, I deactivated my Twitter account. When I go to log in, primarily out of habit, what greets me is this:

Reminding me that I no longer belong to Twitter like 80% of the population. Do I miss it? The place where I used to virtually shake my fist at my local politicians and get all in a tizzy? Surprisingly, no. I don't miss it at all. Huh. And here's the important point -- you don't sell books on Twitter. I don't think anyone on Twitter ever went and bought one of my books because I called my representative a moron, so really, what is the point? 

The toxicity is, I daresay, worse than the pandemic. Why would I want that in my life? The truth is, I don't. If I ever go back to Twitter, I will start from scratch and it will be a positive vibes only situation. I simply can't deal with all of this negativity (of which I am also culpable) all of the time. Truly, I think it's making my hair fall out!

But it's not just Twitter. Social media is changing, y'all. The kids who are now in their teens and twenties are all Snapchat and TikTok. Instagram seems to appeal to all ages but is owned by Facebook. Facebook is and has been, by and large, for middle-aged/old people, and Facebook's verified pages have just become a bloody mess. I'll explain.

In December of 2020, I had 14,000 people who liked and followed my professional page. Fast forward to March of 2021, and I have 14,500 people who like my page and 45,000 who follow the page -- where did those new 30,000 followers come from? Did I get elected to office? Win the lottery? Become a movie star? Nope, nope, nope.

Seriously. What the heck happened? I have no idea. My publisher has no idea. And Facebook has no idea. Here's what I do know. Those followers are predominately men from Russia and Africa and South America (assuming their profiles are legitimate) and they like to spend their time replying to the women who comment on the posts I put up on my page with little gems like this: 

Argh! Same dude hit at least four women who commented on a picture of cake (it's always cake) on my page. I thought it might just be me. Like maybe I clicked on some random ad, probably for cake, that opened the trolling male hellmouth and unleashed it on my page. Nope. I checked out other authors' verified pages and they're getting slammed, too. Our Rhys has also seen the weirdness. I then checked out some celebrity pages and the same nonsense is happening on their blue checked pages.

Frankly, social media is looking a lot like the mouse plague in Australia! 

Then my Facebook page got duplicated and the hacker was sending out friend requests using my pictures, bio, and name and offering free books of mine (insert your credit card number here -- but free books!!!! ACK!). Facebook insisted there was nothing wrong. Mother of pearl! You have got to be kidding me. 

My publisher reached out to Facebook and their response was essentially a shrug and a head scratch and a mumble as they exited the room. Really? You can write an algorithm to make sure an ad for dog booties pops up in my feed every three posts, but you can't write one to weed out the trolls? Huh.

All of this is to say, there is some weirdness afoot and I don't think it is going to end well. And because the momentum of social media is like that of a shark - it must stay in motion or it will die - there is now a thing called #BookTok (like #Bookstagram on Instagram) where authors and readers promote books on TikTok and I just have to say...I can't. I just can't. 

You know, I've heard for years that blogging is dead, but I have to say that compared to all of the insanity I am witnessing out there, I love this safe, positive, interesting, funny, charming blog of ours with all my heart. 

So, Reds and Readers, chime in! What weirdness have you seen out there? What sites do you trust? What do you think the future of social media is?

Lastly, please be careful out there! 

Time for the Jungle Reds Social Media Round Up

Okay, so every time I turn around there's a new social media thing-a-ma-jig. Honestly, I'm not sure how we're supposed to maintain all these things all the time and actually get books written, but I digress.

The Reds are all pretty active on various platforms, so I thought I'd update everyone on where you can find us by listing our social media handles and websites. 

Life moves pretty fast, you have to double back every now and then to keep up! Speaking of which, the Jungle Reds will be chatting live with the Poisoned Pen on Saturday, Feb 13th at 2pm MST. Don't miss it!

Readers, hit us in the comments to tell us what social media you're following and also if you have a handle, post it so we can follow back!

Jungle Red Writers 

Website: https://www.jungleredwriters.com/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/jungleredwriters/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/jungleredwriters/

Twitter: https://twitter.com/junglereds

Julia Spencer-Fleming

Website: https://us.macmillan.com/author/juliaspencerfleming/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/juliaspencerfleming/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/juliaspencerfleming/

Twitter: https://twitter.com/JSpencerFleming

BookBub: https://www.bookbub.com/authors/julia-spencer-fleming

Lucy Burdette

Website: https://lucyburdette.com/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/LucyBurdette/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/lucyburdette/

Twitter: https://twitter.com/LucyBurdette

BookBub: https://www.bookbub.com/profile/lucy-burdette

Hallie Ephron

Website: http://hallieephron.com/home/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/hallie.ephron/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/hallie.ephron/

Twitter: https://twitter.com/HallieEphron

BookBub: https://www.bookbub.com/authors/hallie-ephron

Rhys Bowen

Website: https://rhysbowen.com/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/RhysBowenAuthor

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/authorrhysbowen/

Twitter: https://twitter.com/Rhysbowen

BookBub: https://www.bookbub.com/authors/rhys-bowen

Hank Phillippi Ryan

Website: https://hankphillippiryan.com/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/HankPhillippiRyanAuthor/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/hankpryan/

Twitter: https://twitter.com/hankpryan

BookBub: https://www.bookbub.com/authors/hank-phillippi-ryan

Deborah Crombie

Website: https://deborahcrombie.com/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/deborah.crombie

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/deborah.crombie/

Twitter:  https://twitter.com/deborahcrombie

BookBub:  https://www.bookbub.com/authors/deborah-crombie

Jenn McKinlay

Website: http://www.jennmckinlay.com/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/JennMcKinlayAuthor/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mckinlayjenn/

Twitter: https://twitter.com/JennMcKinlay

BookBub: https://www.bookbub.com/authors/jenn-mckinlay

Reach Out and Touch Someone

INGRID THOFT

Earlier this week, my husband called from the car during his commute to say that our friend Jonathan had just been interviewed on NPR.  It’s not unusual for him to be on NPR or TV news shows in an expert capacity, but as I brought up the interview on the web, I realized it had been over a year since I’d been in touch with Jonathan.

We’re not the kind of friends who talk every day, every week, or even every month, but a year?  That’s way too long.  I’m busy, and he’s busy, and the world is chaotic right now, but that’s all the more reason to reach out to our friends and family, even if it’s just a quick text or private message on social media.

So I’m challenging everyone today.  If you’ve been thinking, “I really need to be in touch with so-and-so,” today is the day.  Who is that person, and can you reach out to them before another day begins?

DEBORAH CROMBIE: What a great idea, Ingrid. I've been really bad at keeping up with people this year, especially my dear friends on the other side of the Pond. So I'm happy to report that in the last couple of days I've made plans to see many of my UK friends (when I'm not writing, of course!) You are so right—we need those connections now more than ever.

HALLIE EPHRON: This is why I love Facebook—it's easy (and so non-invasive) to refresh a contact with friends who hang out there. And I was just thinking about Christmas cards, and the time may be right for reviving my habit of sending them.

JENN McKINLAY: A couple of years ago, I made a New Year's resolution to have lunch/coffee/dinner with every friend I'd lost track of and I did. It was lovely but...life. I have come to accept that I can't hang on to everyone so I've lost touch with a few friends. Now I randomly text people when they pop into my head. It's the best I can do at the moment and it works because it's the best most of my friends can do as well. When did we all become so busy?

RHYS BOWEN: This is so true! While I'm great at keeping in touch with family, I realize I have dear friends whom I should call more often. I'm so glad when I do call them or see them in person but life seems so busy that I forget how important people are to me. That's one of the reasons I'm so grateful to be part of JRW. At least I talk to you ladies every week!

HANK PHILLIPPI RYAN: Ingrid, this is so increasingly important to me. Seems as if our lives are going by so quickly, and there’s no time, and we figure, oh, I’ll catch up with that person soon. And soon never comes. I always think about how semi-complicated it is to keep friendships strong—even conversations, well-meaning and affectionate as they are, are so brief and shallow. Sometimes, after a dinner or party or whatever, I’ll say to Jonathan, “Did anyone talk about anything real?” But those kinds of conversations are not instant, and only can come with care and time and attention.  And I am as guilty as anyone of having my life go by so fast that those connections falter.  Yes, yes, I promise to do better. Thank you, dear Ingrid. You are so wise.

It's your turn.  Who are you going to be in touch with today?

Judy, who loved Replique perfume, you've won a copy of Ellen Byron's new book.  Send me your mailing address at ingrid@ingridthoft.com.

Addicted to Facebook

RHYS BOWEN: Like most writers I will do anything, yes anything, to avoid writing. I will stare at the computer, get up, throw a load in the laundry, dead head the flowers, dust the ornaments, make out to-do lists for the next three months, rather than get down to the scene I’m supposed to be finishing.
And one of the things I do lately is to check out Facebook. I try to avoid the political stuff; it makes me too depressed and it’s hard to tell the fake news. But I’m a sucker for the baby animals, the cute animal friendships. Who knew what noises a baby sloth makes? And when I found out it was really “Oh, is that all?”
But the quizzes. What color is your aura? What were you in a past life? I am especially tempted by the ones that start “Only a genius can get all these right.”
Of course I get them all right. They were easy.
And it turns out there is a reason they were easy… quizzes are a way of hacking into accounts.
Who knew? Does that mean I won’t be able to find out what career is right for me? What sign my ideal mate should be? Does that mean I’ll actually have to sit down and write all day?
So fellow Reds: who else does Facebook quizzes?
And what else do you do to keep you from sitting on a chair and getting on with your writing?

HALLIE EPHRON: The other day I sorted through a 2-foot-high stack of mail accumulated over several years, just to avoid writing. I never do quizzes, but I still love to hang out in Facebook and see what my kids/friends are up to. And I'm sadly addicted to newsfeeds because how much more bizarre can things get?

LUCY BURDETTE: I'm surprised to hear you are a procrastinator, Rhys--as much as you produce! And Hallie, that two foot pile of mail sounds positively awful. I know we will have that in Connecticut waiting for us in April. But meanwhile, it's all about the Facebook addiction for me. I love catching up with friends and fans--and I know I miss 90% of what's been posted. I also like to peruse Pinterest, mostly for recipes to try. And this mostly happens at night when I'm hungry. So if you see a flurry of pins from me, you'll know exactly what's going on!

JULIA SPENCER-FLEMING: I'm seldom on Facebook, which frustrates my friends and family members who use it regularly. What I do to keep from writing? Clean, of course. It's amazing how compelling the dusting can become when you can't think of how to continue a scene. The laundry. Walking the dog. Driving Youngest to school/play rehearsal/archery/mosque/pizza place. To tell the truth, it's not so much that I do things to avoid writing: it's that I have so much to do I have to MAKE time to write. Which, again, is very easy to avoid...

I want to hear more about the quizzes as hacker tools, Rhys. I don't take them, but The Smithie is addicted to the ones on Buzzfeed. Does it matter where you find them? Or all they all suspect?

RHYS: Julia it was on the news this week that Facebook quizzes have become an easy way to hack into accounts, get personal information. I have to say I don't do any quizzes that want my email address or anything else personal about me, but I suppose if they can get into my Facebook account they could find quite a lot.

DEBORAH CROMBIE: I don't do quizzes, Rhys, I'm not even tempted, so I guess I'm safe there. But I do procrastinate!! I am way too addicted to news these days, so am planning a "news diet." And I check on Facebook, and make lists, and look at recipes, and clean. To my credit, I've managed to resist daytime televsion, but why is it so hard for writers to sit down and WRITE????

HANK PHILLIPPI RYAN: I love quizzes, and am  tempted to do all of them. But not after I saw they get your email and contacts list. So--I don't.  Daytime TV, never. Laundry! Closet organization! Cleaning the refrigerator. Stuff I would NEVER otherwise be interested in doing suddenly becomes a necessity.  But just in the past few days, I've been intensely wanting to write. I mean, I can't wait. So weird! And I'm sure that will pass.  But usually I am so easily distracted that I literally set a timer, and agree with myself not to do anything else--, not email,  not Facebook, not getting a diet coke, not anything--until I do my hour. Works for me. And I'm not as addicted to Facebook as I used to be. We should talk about that sometime.

INGRID THOFT: I've never done the quizzes, probably because having a software developer husband has caused me to be highly skeptical about such things.  I do peruse Facebook more than I should, and I also find that household chores call my name when the going gets tough on the writing front.  One of my favorite forms of procrastination is reading the articles on longform.org.  It's an aggregation of the best long form articles on the web, and the content is terrific.  I tell myself this form of procrastination isn't so terrible; I'm learning all kinds of things and even possibly doing research!  And Rhys, I'm a total sucker for baby animals.  Seriously, nothing makes me happier than a picture of a tea cup pig in a tea cup!

JENN: Quiz girl here! It started with the Cosmo quizzes when I was a teen and I'm still an addict. How else can I find out which  Greek goddess I am or who my celebrity husband is? LOL. I am less of an FB addict than I used to be - politics has curbed it for me. Because I have multiple deadlines and I do get sucked into the Internet wormhole, I had to install a babysitter on my Mac Book called Waste No Time. I set how many minutes I'm allowed on certain sites and then it blocks them. Period. Because my life is like Julia's - so many gigs of the Hub and the hooligans to coordinate - making the time to write is critical to getting it done. But, like Ingrid and Rhys, I'm a sucker for the cute animals pics. How can you resist a duckling in a raincoat?

RHYS: Waste No Time. Jenn, I am getting it today! I could live with just one baby animal a day, I am sure.
So.... dear readers, time for confession. Who else does all the Facebook quizzes? Who is not even on Facebook?

LIKE yourself more and share feel-good posts LESS on Facebook

HALLIE EPHRON: Every day I spend much more time UNsubscribing to newsletters I never asked for than actually reading one. And for the first time in months I recently subscribed to one!

It's all because of Facebook. I posted:

Speed bump: I just "liked" my own post

I'd inadvertently LIKED my own post. In the comments, a familiar name popped up (from Facebook and she comments here.) Yochaved Miriam Russo said:

Actually, it's a good idea to 'like' your own posts -- I haven't gotten into the habit, but it makes sense to do so. 

She included a link that introduced me to Rick's Daily Tips. Rick Rouse writes a newsletter chockablock with very useful tips for clueless Internet dwellers like me. Stuff like: Facebook algorithms tip in your favor when you like your own post.


His latest newsletter had something that shocked me.

He warned against clicking on or liking or sharing what he calls "feel good posts on Facebook." You know, the kind that you click on and share because they're cute... Like:

Adorable, right?

I am very careful about what I click on and rarely get stung, never open emails from sources I don't recognize, but when I saw this tip I knew I had some learning to do. 

Rick says what looks completely innocent could be “Like and Share Bait.” After it's been LIKED and SHARED a lot, it gets replaced by something offensive or a spam image or links to a virus that downloads when the next person clicks on it. 

So thanks to Rick I'm done SHARING those kinds of posts - and LIKING myself a whole lot more.

Here are some of Rick's other posts that you might like... and maybe like me you'll end up signing up for his newsletter. There are worse ways to waste your time.

• Scam Alert: Beware the latest Facebook virus scam
• Scam Alert: Don’t fall for the “Hack Your Friends” scam on Facebook
• Scam Alert: Beware the “Update Flash Player” virus scam on Facebook
• Scam alert: Be wary of those “Watch out for this creep!” posts on Facebook
• Scam Alert: Don’t fall for the despicable “Sick Child” scam on Facebook

Have you been scammed with an innocent click?

Facing Facebook

HANK PHILLIPPI RYAN:   Remember when there was no Facebook? Really. Try. First, what did we do with all that time? Write poetry?  Read great books? Make souffles? Talk on the—whaddaya call it? Phone?
Second, of all the unanswerable questions in the universe--like,  why does the last item never fit into the dishwasher, why do you think of the perfect bon mot too late, HOW could we have forgotten whatever it was and why does everything always get scheduled for the same day--now we have to answer a new one.

Does Facebook matter?

Okay, I’ll go first. I have no idea. I—like it, though. I do. I’m fascinated to hear what’s happening with everyone, I love hearing about funny stuff, and life changes, and books, and ideas. Ideas! I love the funny videos (did you see the conducting kid?) and the  old wedding photos and the quizzes about which movie star or dog breed I’m the most like.  (I even liked creating my Star Trek name, Ryaha Millri.  Or something like that.)

But I am constantly amazed at how I can get lost in the Facebook molasses…drawn into the vortex of jokes and gossip and news and daily lives and I look up, and 30 minutes have gone by. What did I do? What did I learn?

And—does it matter?  Is it our back fence, bringing us closer together? Or is it the worst time-waster in the history of the planet?
Are you on Facebook? How do you feel about that? 

LUCY BURDETTE: Definitely an addict here. And it FEELS like our back fence. But it's a terrible time-waster, I'm certain of that. I swear I'm reading less because of Facebook. On the other hand, I've met people I wouldn't otherwise know, and heard their stories, and gotten and given sympathy...Oh yeah, and my stripper name is Schatzie Sutton.

HALLIE EPHRON: I confess, I am addicted to it. I love connecting with people, and with so little overhead (no driving, no making dinner reservations, I can 'hide' people who verge on annoying...) My high school reunion is coming up, and it's such a perfect way to remember classmates, for better or worse. I do not take the quizzes.

RHYS BOWEN: Guilty too. I found out that my son had gotten

engaged on Facebook. I see pictures of my grandkids' achievements on Facebook, plus family members across the globe, plus cute puppies interacting with chicks Plus finding out what my stripper/Game of Thrones/fairy name is. Supreme time waster... however, I am quite aware of its power. I have almost 11,000 followers on my author page and if I post that I have cut my finger I can guarantee that within an hour I'll have a hundred or more people volunteering to type my manuscripts for me. I've never had such immediate and intense interaction with fans.

SUSAN ELIA MACNEAL: Yes, I'm on Facebook. I have such a love/hate relationship with it, though! As a work-from-home writer and mom, it's a great place to take a "break" — the equivalent of yesteryear's water cooler. Yes, I suspect I spend too much time on it and have been cutting down. There are great time-tracking software programs (I like rescue time.com) that lets you know exactly how much time you're spending on which sites. But, really, I feel like I get so much from it — most of my friends are scattered around the globe — and I love staying in touch, seeing pictures of their kids and pets, etc. In fact, every time I think of quitting, someone posts an adorable baby photo or a puppy video and I'm

hooked again.....


DEBORAH CROMBIE: I love Facebook, too. I look at it as the equivalent of reading a daily "friends" newspaper. (And usually so much LESS depressing than an actual "news" paper, although it allows me to keep up when friends are having problems as well as keeping up with the babies and puppies/kittens). But I just skim a couple of times a day, and don't ever look at Facebook when I could be reading a BOOK!

Like Rhys, I love the interaction with readers on my author page, and consider that a valuable part of my daily life as a writer. On the personal side, I don't do politics, games, or quizzes, although I do like to share a good joke or video.


HANK PHILLIPPI RYAN: Rhys, oh no! Hilarious. Yes, it's

amazing. People ask me the most personal things, and I always think--how did you know about that? And then I realize, gulp, I put it on Facebook. :-)  I've gotten cooking advice, and work advice, character names and grammar assistance. 

I know I see some of you on my Facebook pages--thank you! Do you look at the personal page or the author page? So give the Reds some guidance: how do you use Facebook? Or not? Can you not live with it--or not live without it?

I Think, Therefore I Think I Can

     HANK PHILLIPPI RYAN:  I'm sorry, I'm laughing. Of all the existential imponderables in the universe-- 

what the heck is a Higgs Boson

what happened before the big bang

are unit prices really correct

 is canned tuna actually tuna

why does the mail come at so many different times depending on the day,

why does our blog change font and spacing randomly and unfixably

how do banks keep track of all those checks

and when the sign in the airport says "You Are Here," how does it know?

 -- the fabulous and talented LynDee Walker proves there is one, big, juicy question that is the unanswerable of unanswerables: 

   How are we supposed to DO all this?

Hang On, Be Right There

   by Lyn Dee Walker

      Distractions. In the age of the iPhone push alert, they’re an ever-present part of life for many of us.

       Not a day goes by that I don’t log into Facebook to see one (or forty) of my author friends declaring that they’re turning off wifi so they can actually, you know, write. There are even computer programs that will block your access to the Internet at certain times of the day. While that feels a little too much like a challenge for my rebellious side, I have several friends who use them and sing their praises.

       I’m just as guilty as the next author of being pulled from my work-in-progress by something shiny on the Internet, but this week, the appeal of Facebook pales in comparison to my house.    

I have three children—10, 5, and 3. They are my light, and the best thing that ever happened to me. Hence, they are often the tallest hurdle between me and writing. I love my babies with the fire of ten thousand suns. Spending time with them makes me happy. So it’s a constant juggling act, with lots of balls to keep in the air.

      Normally, I write in the morning after the older two have left for school and before the little one gets out of bed. And if something interferes with that, I can fit in 1,000 words or so at nap time, or in the evening after my hubby is through working for the day.

     This week is the perfect storm of mommy writer indecision in my house, y’all: I need to finish my new book in the next ten days. Writing isn’t a luxury right now: it’s a must.

      It is also Spring Break. My hubby is out of town. And that whole saying about the best laid plans? Yeah. They’re not working for me, either.

      My ten-year-old is very math-and-science-brained. She loves charts and graphs. I can already tell she’s going to be a spreadsheet person, just like her dad. Yesterday, she made a pretty poster we could use to check off my word count goal for the week in 500-word increments. We taped it to the kitchen wall.

       This morning, I came downstairs ready to open my laptop and knock off a couple of checkmarks before the children woke up. Then my BFF called with mommy worries about a super-feverish baby (the doctor couldn’t see him until 11), and by the time we’d talked through the childhood illness checklist, my littles were awake.

      Now, I’m pretty darned good at tuning out noise while I write. Years of working in a newsroom will do that to you. Scanners bleeping, sports guys tossing Nerf footballs and arguing about who has the best arm in whichever pro sports league is going at the moment, phones ringing, editors shouting: if you’re easily distracted, you never finish a story. I could get so lost in writing an article or designing a page my own phone could buzz with a transferred call and I wouldn’t notice until the receptionist walked to my desk and put her hand between my face and the screen. That’s a finely-honed ability to ignore, y’all.

      My children are enterprising, though. They adapt. The better I am at focusing on my work, the more they step up their game.

       My smallest one, who is so cute you just want to smother her with hugs all day long (I’m a teensy bit biased. But only a bit) has an internal timer. If I sit with my laptop for more than half an hour, she walks over and matter-of-factly closes it, with the sweetest smile you’ve ever seen. “Are you finished with your work, mommy?” she asks.

I am now.

*Yelp*Crash*

Oops. Stand by, y’all.

*********

      Okay, I’m back. To prove my point, in the past thirty-five seconds, my little one asked for help getting her dress off (yes, off, at 11:30 in the morning. Because she can). Freedom from her clothing inspired her to hold my face between her hands and sing me three verses of “Let It Go.”

      While she belted out the final chorus, my son tripped over the dog (our dog weighs six pounds and is less than a foot long from nose to pointed tail. You’d almost have to try to trip over her) and vaulted his snow-cone cup into the air. Snow cone splattered all over the white Berber in our living room (inherited from the house’s previous owners, who obviously had no children).

      I’ve now set the computer aside, stripped the baby’s dress off, smiled at her singing, checked on the dog (she’s good. And so happy with her treat it makes me wonder if an instant replay wouldn’t show her slipping underfoot on purpose. She’s smart, that pooch), and scrubbed rainbow ice syrup out of the carpet.

     Where were we?

     Oh, right. Distractions.

     There you have mine for this morning. I’m thinking it’s going to be a coffee and writing after bedtime kind of night in the Walker house.

     What about you, Reds? How do you handle writing distractions?

HANK: HA! (But we'll give a copy of SMALL TOWN SPIN to a lucky commenter!)

LD:   And dear readers—how do you juggle work and family? 

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SMALL TOWN SPIN

When a superstar athlete's son turns up dead in a tiny town on the Virginia coast, crime reporter Nichelle Clarke gets the inside scoop. But she quickly spies a gaping hole her inner Lois Lane cannot ignore.

Determined to unravel the mystery, Nichelle fights off paparazzi cameras and an unexpected rival. She uncovers an illegal moonshine operation, a string of copycat suicides, and a slew of closets stacked with more skeletons than slingbacks. Chasing a killer who’s a breath from getting away with murder, Nichelle realizes too late the culprit has her number—and it might be up.

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LynDee Walker’s award-winning journalistic work has appeared in newspapers and magazines across the nation. After nearly a decade covering crime, courts, and local politics, she left full-time reporting for motherhood with a side of freelancing and fiction writing. LynDee’s debut novel, FRONT PAGE FATALITY, is an amazon and Barnes & Noble #1 bestseller, and an Agatha Award nominee for Best First Novel. SMALL TOWN SPIN is the third in her Headlines in High Heels mystery series. The fourth arrives January 2015.

LynDee adores her family, her readers, and enchiladas. She works out tricky plot points while walking off the enchiladas. She lives in Richmond, Virginia, where she is either playing with her children or working on her next novel—but probably not cleaning her house. You can find her online at www.lyndeewalker.com.

LynDee Walker

The Headlines in High Heels Mysteries

www.lyndeewalker.com

Get signed copies: Fountain Bookstore

Twitter: @LynDeeWalker

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