Winners and Losers of the Olympic Fashion Competition

 JULIA SPENCER-FLEMING: It's here! The XXXIIII (34th) Olympiad, a number which leads me to believe the IOC is still only counting my every four years, despite revamping the schedule to alternate summer and winter games. Mark my words, they'll be adding fall and spring games any year now. Can't leave any of that sweet, sweet broadcasting rights money on the table.

Will Americans crash the Parisian electrical grid with their massive A/C units? Will swimmers get disgusting infections from racing in the Seine? I have no idea. So let's turn from questions to opinions, and get judgy with it: "it" being various countries' opening ceremony (wasn't it amazing?) and competition uniforms. Who better to give a critique than an out-of-shape, couch-bound old lady whose only athletic pastimes (skiing, running) wrecked her knees? (Links to original tweets in the country names.)

United States of America

Classic Americana. Not really fashion-forward, but attractive and looks good on all everyone. You can imagine the athletes wearing these in years to come.

Canada

Oh, Canada.

"New Canadian Olympic uniforms made from real Alberta beef."

Jamaica

 These competition kits are flat-out awesome. Body-conscious without being gratuitously sexy (calling you out, Nike "hoo-hah" uniforms,) great color placement for a sometimes difficult color combo (see Australia, below) these are definitely in the top ten this year.

Australia

Oz's official colors are green and gold, but you can't fool me, that's just yellow. Nice use of teal instead of bright green, and the designs are very down under - breezy and casual, with a hint of British influence. But those skirts! Especially the unfortunate one second from the left. It looks like this poor woman has wandered away from her caretakers and had an accident.

South Korea

 I'm not sure how I feel about South Korea's entry. It's exactly the same for men and women, which is kind of cool, and it's a beautifully draped summer suit. Once you know about the origin of the belt, you can say, "Okay, I get it." But that gorgeous silk lining is wasted hidden on the inside!

Spain

*

The curse of yellow strikes again - what is with these deeply unflattering skirts? The designer may be channeling the carnation for inspiration, but it just looks like not-very-creative tie-dye to me.

Malaysia

You don't have to read Malaysian to understand what this tweet is saying. Remember the blog we did on TEMU? It looks like the team ordered their uniforms and the mannequins used to display them from there. Hope they got free shipping.

France

I'm going to have to agree with the chief fashion critic of the NY Times. France. You had ONE job. You're the host this year, and you're the fashion capitol of the world. Okay, you had TWO jobs.

Nigeria

Going out on a high note - Nigeria, already becoming a player on the international fashion stage, has hit the ball out of the parc with these looks. Maybe Canada ought to look into hiring Actively Black for the next games? Just sayin'.

What do you think, dear readers?  Which uniforms strike your fancy? What have I left out?

The Rhys Bowen Pandemic Olympics

RHYS BOWEN:

Those of you who know me realize that I am a sports nut. I watch any kind of sport—I attend spring training for the Giants at Scottsdale Stadium, I watch my granddaughters play water polo, live or on TV, I watch football, baseball, golf, swimming, gymnastics. To show you how desperate I have become I watched an hour’s program on competitive stone lifting in Scotland. Apparently big hairy men try to lift 300 pound rocks they find lying around in fields. Not my favorite sport.

You probably can guess how disappointed I am that the Olympics are not taking place at this moment in Japan. There is a glimmer of hope on the horizon. Giants and As played a pre-season game last night. With fake crowd noise and cardboard cutouts of fans in the stadium seats. Plus two giant teddy bears (one of whom had fallen asleep).

So I decided to hold my own Olympics. I am proud to say that I now own several international records.

Speed events:

Cup and pee: Put cup of tea in microwave, press start, run to bathroom to pee, return before microwave beeps (having washed hands correctly) I have achieved this remarkable feat not once but several times. (NO PIX SUPPLIED FOR OBVIOUS REASONS)

Unload cutlery from dishwasher. 38 seconds. (And we only run dishwasher every 3 days so an impressive feat of speed and dexterity with every knife, fork and spoon in correct slot)

Twenty yard uphill dash (should be considered a sport for next Olympics):  Sprint up stairs from office when I think I hear Amazon Prime dropping a package into box outside front door.) 7 seconds is current record.

Dexterity and Strength events:

I assembled a new patio umbrella for our upstairs balcony, with only minimal help from spouse. (actually minus help. No, you’re holding it backwards. It needs to go the other way around. THE OTHER WAY AROUND…)

Strength events:

Sand carry.  Carry 110 pounds of sand up to said balcony to fill the weighted stand for umbrella. An impressive feat on a hot day.

Endurance events:

Three Zoom sessions in one day. That is a lot of smiling and looking relaxed and competent. Cheek massage needed afterward.

Dexterity Events:

Put polish on own toenails without going over the edges.

Cut own hair.

Cut spouse’s hair.

(these definitely demonstrate more skill than the balance beam or target shooting)

So let’s hear your Pandemic Olympic feats! Which sport do you miss most?

Rhys has a little Rant!

RHYS BOWEN: Okay sorry but this is going to be a minor rant.

I’ve just returned from a few book events around the country and something annoying happened to me on a regular basis: an agent at the airport or rental car center or hotel would look at me, then the man standing ahead or behind me and ask, “Are you together?”  When I go into an upscale restaurant I’ve been asked, “Are you waiting for someone?”  As if shocked that a woman of a certain age should dare to eat alone.

I bet.a man standing in line has NEVER been asked “are you together” indicating a lady standing behind him. I was once standing in line for a rental car. Although an agent appeared to be free I was not called forward. Eventually I asked if the agent wasn't free. "Oh, I thought you'd be with that gentleman," he replied. It never crossed his mind that I was alone, and was going to have the audacity to take a car out, by myself.

(And in case you think I look like a little old lady when I travel, here are some recent pix. With me in the fur coat is Robin Burcell)

As I’ve been watching the election and the Olympics and being bombarded with sexual stereotyping (Hilary raises her voice and she’s screeching. A male raises his voice and he’s being assertive). Female athletes have their appearance commented on all the time.. Do you ever hear the commentator say of a male volleyball player,  “He’s looking hunky today?” And what about the one athlete whose headline read “Wife of Chicago Bulls Player wins gold.” Never mentioning her name or her sport.

Well, I’ve decided not to take it any more. Each time I was asked if I was with someone I’ve replied, “ Is it now against the law for a woman over fifty to travel alone?”

And when they ask in that restaurant if I’m waiting for someone I reply, “Only if I get lucky” 

And I’ve found a way to make sure I get good service after that. I never take the first table I am offered, especially if it’s near the rear or the kitchen. I say “I prefer to sit over here, thank you” and walk over to the nicest table. And as soon as I sit I say “I’m on business and I don’t have long. Please send over the somelier with your wine list” and I order something unpronounceable (or at least something that I can pronounce and most people can’t). Then the word goes out that I might be difficult and the service is excellent!

So let’s take a stand, dear Reds of a certain age. Let them know that just because we are older women we do not sit at home crocheting, or go out playing bingo. And we don’t need a man to travel with!

Do share your stories! Have you experienced the same kind of put downs?

At least we writers have one secret weapon. When someone particularly annoys me I take a good look at them and think, "Careful or you'll wind up dead in my next book!"

Olympic Dreams

RHYS BOWEN: Did you all watch the opening ceremony on Friday? I'm always so amused the way each country tries to outdo the previous games.  I expect I'll be glued to the telly for the next two weeks. Actually I've been getting an overdose of sports viewing ever since Wimbledon. I have been watching, in horrified fascination, American Ninja Warrior, Spartan races, Olympic trials in swimming, gymnastics and track and field. Frankly I'm absolutely exhausted. And as for those athletes--how do they do it?

When I was young I was quite athletic. I played tennis quite well. I represented my college in tennis and table tennis and netball.But our training was at most running around the field once before we started playing. Nothing like these supermen and women these days. Those ninjas who can hang on by their fingertips, those Spartans who drag one another up walls, and tiny Simone Biles who can fly through the air as if weightless. How do they do it?

 And then I realize that they spend their whole life doing it. We had tennis practice probably twice a week. No weight training, no distance training, no therapists or ice baths or anything like that. We got on a bus, drove to another school and after five minutes warm-up we played.

Now I have two granddaughters who are water polo players and swimmers. They have to be at school at 5:45 a.m. for weight training. They work out year round for their sport with land exercises, push ups as well as heaven knows how many yards swum in the pool. So it looks as if we're growing a generation of super heroes, doesn't it.

And I'm feeling very inadequate. I belong to a health club. I go and swim a bit every day. I sometimes work on the weight machines--rather gently. I hike with friends when I can. John and I walk (or rather stroll) every evening. But I watch the Olympics and think I SHOULD BE DOING MORE.

So, dear Reds and readers, do you still work out? How fit are you? Do you wish you could do more? Are we too obsessed with fitness these days?

SUSAN ELIA MACNEAL: I was a figure skater when I was younger (it's cold in Buffalo — everyone skates and/or skis) and had dreams of Olympic glory — until I broke a leg and then an arm in quick succession and discovered musical theater (and boys!) in high school. It's amazing how far the sport of figure skating has come —when I was watching, it was a big deal if a woman could do a double axel and then the first triple. Now triples are the norm for women and quads for guys.

Meanwhile, Noel and Kiddo do Hapkido (a Korean martial art form) and sometimes we go to the gym together as a family. Kiddo is really into riding these days, too. I love to watch him on horseback — so thrilling!

These days I'm at the gym at least three times a week (elliptical, stationary bike, and weights) and take a weekly yoga class I love, too. After a difficult pregnancy, multiple surgeries, illnesses, and several bouts with anemia, it feels good to be in somewhat decent shape again. And I don't ever take it for granted!

HALLIE EPHRON: I don't want to talk about this. Because I am throwing away money every month on a gym membership I don't use. My exercise at this time of year is gardening (clipping bushes and pulling weeds) and walking. Not enough, I know. I promise myself, when I turn in my manuscript... You guys are making me feel like a wimp.

DEBORAH CROMBIE: Hallie, I beat you, ha ha!! I'm a bigger wimp. I was never athletic at all. I did love to swim as a kid, but not in any competitive way. Horrible at sports, etc., etc. I've given up on gym memberships--I just won't do it. I do, however, love to walk, but I'm even slacking on that right now because it's too HOT. By the time I get up and do an hour's worth of watering, I just want to go in and cool off. Maybe next week...

My Fitbit does tell me that I do miles every day just on all my inside and outside chores, so I am at least burning some calories!!!

HANK PHILLIPPI RYAN:  Hey, I took beginning tennis (a one semester course) in college for THREE YEARS because I was so terrible. I had no depth perception AT ALL so any kind of sports was demoralizing and impossible.

 I ran for about a year, then my knees gave out. I took aerobic dancing, and got a stress fracture. I can kind of ice skate--but I had on music headphones and decided, inspired by hearing O Fortuna, that I could do a backwards jump. I could not. End of story.

 I don't like to go to the gym because it is too complicated--go in, change clothes, hang stuff up in a tiny locker, do something that's not fun, shower in a yucky place, have wet hair, get dressed again. I mean--why? We have a treadmill and a Nordic track in our exercise room  (spare bedroom) and I love them.  (I worry about upper body strength, though..)

 But now--I am devoted to my Fitbit, and love it, and swear by the walking exercise.

This is the last extant photo of me doing anything physical. I think I had just nailed the 200 meter butterfly. Or something.

LUCY BURDETTE: I am still annoyed that title nine came long after my time. In high school, very few girls played actual sports. We wanted to be cheerleaders! When I wasn't selected for that, I had a short stint as a highlander dancer for our schools all girl bagpipe band. I exercised on and off through my 20s, with little periods of running and lots of Jane Fonda tapes (remember those?)Then in my 30s, I decided to take tennis lessons with a friend who was also single. I caught the bug and got good enough to play USTA tennis. I also found John at a singles tennis event. Here's a photo of us before we even started dating.

Then I took up golf because he loved it, and and skiing because he and his kids loved it. I did not love it – too cold, too much clunky equipment, too high, too scary, too icy. And I hurt my knee. To this day, John insists that was my best sport!

These days I think it's super important to stay strong as we get older. So I walk (having a dog helps a lot), go to Pilates class, and go to a personal trainer for weight training. With someone else cracking the whip, I am pushed in ways I simply wouldn't do on my own. But I don't want to end up as one of those old ladies who can't get up from the toilet LOL.

RHYS: Okay, confess... who is still super fit and what fun activities can you suggest for the rest of us?

Do You Go For The Gold? Or for the Clicker?

HANK PHILLIPPI RYAN: I will admit it.  When my sister and I were kids, say, 8 and 5? We would do Olympic events in the living room. The couch was both pommel horse and balance beam. Much to the chagrin of my mom.  It never worked very successfully. (In the winter, we would ice skate in socks on the slick wood of the hallway. That was incredibly successful, and gave me much confidence.  Unfulfilled on real ice.)

We just saw a very wonderful documentary about the Boys on the Boat, the 1936 Olympics. So great.

Do you watch the Olympics?  (I do.) (Pretty much.) (My station is an NBC affiliate.) 

Why?

Claire Booth--whose new book THE BRANSON BEAUTY is getting amazing reviews, and so well-deserved, has some thoughts.

Go for the Gold

   By Claire Booth

The Olympics start tomorrow. I can’t wait! I am a hopeless Olympic romantic. I’m in love with them. I love sports as it is, but the Olympics take my enjoyment to a whole new level. The competitions, the flags, the tears. The sappy athlete profiles from NBC.

Yes, I’m not ashamed (too much) to admit that I love the vignettes that the Peacock Network subjects us to during their Olympics coverage.

Sure they’re slick and overproduced, and sometimes overwrought, but they’re stories. Little books in miniature, where the only thing missing is the ending – how will the determined athlete do? And so of course, you watch the event and you cheer even more than you would have, because now you’re invested.

You’re kidding, she never even got in a pool until she was fifteen?! Oh my gosh, he’s come back from two broken feet to run in this race!

Say what you want about NBC, they make you care whether you intend to or not. Which is not unlike, say, a novelist.

Writers have to get you to care about the characters. They have to manipulate your emotions. If they’re really good, they make you laugh, or cry, or gasp in surprise. And they convince you to stick around for the finish.

 (Billy Miles wins the 10,000 meter race at the 1964 Olympics. Credit: U.S. Marine Corps)

Sometimes, though, no matter what novelists come up with, reality beats us at our own game.

At the 1936 Olympics, an African American athlete named Jesse Owens won four track and field gold medals. In Berlin. In front of Adolf Hitler.

In 1979, the Soviet Union invaded Afghanistan. In response, President Carter decreed that the United States would boycott the 1980 Summer Olympics in Moscow. American athletes became pawns in the Cold War.

There are many more instances, of course, where real world politics mixed with the sports of the Olympics. As a former journalist, I have to admit that I follow these stories particularly closely. This year, I’m really looking forward watching the refugee team, made up of athletes from South Sudan and other war-torn nations that don’t have Olympic squads, compete.

There is always so much to learn about storytelling from real life, and there’s no better microcosm of the world today than the Olympics and its athletes.

Reds, do you watch the Olympics? Which events are your favorites? And do you sit through the athlete profiles or prefer to go straight to the action?

HANK:  Summer Olympics? Gymnastics. (Nadia!) Track and field. Not so much beach volleyball.

Winter? Figure skating.   I am SO predictable. (Torvill and Dean!)

And I have a t-shirt, because I work for NBC, that’s the official NBC 1980 Olympic t-shirt. Except it turned out to be an event that they did not cover.

How about you? Olympics? I give them a…9.5.  (Except for that doping and cheating thing.)

And have you read Claire's THE BRANSON BEAUTY? It's a marvelous locked room--er, boat--mystery. I loved it! So much--that I'll give a copy to one lucky commenter!

 *************

Claire Booth spent more than a decade as a daily newspaper reporter, much of it covering crimes so convoluted and strange they seemed more like fiction than reality. Eventually, she had enough of the real world and decided to write novels instead. Her Sheriff Hank Worth mystery series takes place in Branson, Missouri, where small-town Ozark politics and big-city country music tourism clash in, yes, strange and convoluted ways. Find her at www.clairebooth.com.

THE BRANSON BEAUTY 

The Branson Beauty, an old showboat, has inexplicably crashed on the waters of the Ozark mountain lake it’s been plying for decades. Hank Worth is still settling into his new job as county sheriff, and when he responds to the emergency call, he knows he’s in for a long winter’s day of ferrying more than one hundred passengers to shore. But he doesn’t expect to find the body of a high school track star locked inside the Captain’s private dining room. Now he must navigate small town politics as he tries to figure out who killed the talented local girl.

Jungle Red Riders

Jungle Reds Writers:  HORSES. As American as apple pie. EVERYONE loves horses. Otherwise, how on earth to account for the long-running success of THIS television show?

The Black Stallion, Fury, Misty of Chincoteague, My Friend Flicka, National Velvet. The list of books and movies rolls endlessly on. And did you know the Olympic equestrian events are the one sport where men and women compete head to head (with one exception our guest will address...)

Author of the forthcoming HARD TWISTED and an equestrian, Chuck Greaves joins us with a primer on the Olympic equestrian events.  By the way, did YOU go through a "horses" phase growing up? Did you have a favorite equine TV show? A favorite BOOK or series about horses? A favorite MOVIE perhaps? Did you ever ride? Do you ride now? Ever have questions about the RULES of all those horse show events? Chuck will be saddling up to join us today and he'd love to hear your questions!

AND we're offering 4 copies of Chuck Greaves' terrific equestrian thriller, HUSH MONEY  to 4 lucky commenters!

Take it away Chuck!

Jungle Red Riders

In a year in which Steven Colbert seems to have spent more time riding Ann Romney’s horse than its trainer has, the dressage competition should attract unprecedented attention in this year’s Olympic Games, which begin on July 17 in horse-friendly London. Since my friends at Jungle Red Writers have been too busy plotting murder and mayhem to follow the run-up to the Olympic equestrian competitions,they’ve invited me to set the table for what promises to be a multi-course feast for even the most casual sport-horse fan.

But first some basics. The three equestrian disciplines – dressage,eventing, and jumping – are the only Olympic events in which men and women compete head-to-head. (That is, if you ignore mixed-doubles badminton, which I strongly recommend.) Each equestrian discipline involves both team and individual competitions,such that six gold medals will be up for grabs when the competitions begin on July 28 at Greenwich Park.
 

Dressage,or what Mr. Colbert calls “horse ballet,” is a subjectively-judged competition in which horse and rider must execute a series of complex patterns and maneuvers. Jumping is an objectively-scored competition in which horse and rider must navigate a course of jumps within a given time. Eventing is a hybrid competition that combines dressage and jumping with a grueling cross-country obstacle course.

The U.S. ranks among the world’s leaders in equestrian sport, along with Germany, France, Netherlands, Belgium, Canada, England, New Zealand, and Brazil. In fact, the U.S. jumping team (this year consisting of Rich Fellers, Beezie Madden, Reed Kessler, and McLain Ward) will be looking to three-peat for Olympic team gold, against stiff competition from the German jumping juggernaut. While Kessler, who only turned 18 – the minimum Olympic qualifying age –on July 9, is the youngest-ever U.S. Olympic equestrienne, her star will be eclipsed in London by English eventing phenom Zara Phillips,whose grandmother should have excellent seats for the competition,since she is, well, the Queen. (Phillips is the daughter of Princess Anne, herself an Olympic equestrienne.)

Speaking of eventing, the U.S. squad of Karen O’Connor, Phillip Dunton, Boyd Martin, Will Coleman, and Tiana Coudray should, as always, be competitive. O’Connor and Dunton are each five-time Olympians,which speaks volumes in what is certainly the most physically-demanding of the equestrian disciplines. Look for eventing powerhouses Germany and New Zealand, however, to give the U.S. team all it can handle in this exciting, viewer-friendly sport.

Which brings us to Ann Romney, the poor little rich girl who co-owns a horse named Rafalca, which will be ridden in London by her trainer,Jan Ebeling. Ebeling joins a strong U.S. dressage squad that includes Steffen Peters, Tina Konyot, and Adrienne Lyle. Peters, who carries the U.S. hopes for individual gold, will have the option of riding one of two horses, either Legolas or Ravel, both of which qualified for the competition in London, where he will face stiff challenges from all three members of the Dutch super-squad of Adelinde Cornelissen, Edward Gal, and Anky van Grunsven – the latter seeking her fourth straight individual dressage gold.

And here’s an interesting sidebar for all you would-be one-percenters: While much has been made in the U.S. about Ann and Mitt Romney’s wealth, consider a dressage stallion named Totilas, on whom Holland’s Gall in 2009 set the world-record score (92.30%) in Grand Prix Freestyle competition. Sold by owner Moorland BV in October of 2010 for the eye-popping sum of £10 million, Totilas is expected to compete in this year’s Games for arch-rival Germany, with 26-year old Matthias Rath in the irons. That alone should make the Olympic dressage competition worth watching.
 

Having personally competed in both show-jumping and dressage, and having attended multiple world championships and World Equestrian Games in the course of my twenty-odd years as an equestrian athlete (marginal)and spectator (semi-avid), I can assure Jungle Red fans that,whatever your level of interest in the equestrian sports, you’re in for a wonderful viewing experience at these Olympic Games, in preparation for which I hope this little primer has helped. 

So please join me in setting aside that book or manuscript, breaking out the cold beverage of your choice, and rooting for all of our great U.S. athletes, both human and equine.

Chuck Greaves is the award-winning author of the equestrian-themed legal thriller Hush Money(Minotaur), and the forthcoming Depression-era true-crime saga Hard Twisted (Bloomsbury.)
Visit him at his website and at his Facebook page!

Never admit your road to inner peace

JAN BROGAN -  Last week,  I had about six waking hours to critique eleven news stories from high school students. After I met my deadline, but before I had to bring the papers back to class, 
 I opened the refrigerator to get something to eat. I had only an hour and a half to shower and get changed, but I  was suddenly consumed with an overriding passion to clean the refrigerator. 


No. I am not a clean-freak.  In fact, I am SO not a clean-freak that should my husband ever leave me, my biggest fear is what the house would look like a month after he was gone.  I am SO not a clean-freak that I sometimes forget about laundry for weeks on end. If someone snuck in and ransacked my office - looking for an important clue to a mystery, of course -  I would never even notice.


And yet, every now and then I take an unusual amount of pleasure in cleaning out the refrigerator.  And so it was last Tuesday. With a burnt out brain, cleaning, scrubbing and reorganizing the contents of the refrigerator was just so satisfying.  Afterward, with just the right number of condiments pruned from the shelves, I felt revived, calm, and maybe just a little powerful.


 This is not just me.  My husband (although he is a clean freak) takes this pleasure in cleaning the car (and yes, my car, too) every single weekend.  My aunt (not a clean freak) used to really love polishing silver.


So what strange menial tasks bring you YOUR BLISS?


HANK PHILLIPPI RYAN: Ironing. I love to iron. I love to iron wrinkly, damp men's oxford cloth shirts, and make then starchy and perfect. Now that I say this, I am overwhelmed with double entendre, which I promise you I did not mean. I am going to stop now, and find a menial chore that's less graphic and suggestive. (Or is it just me? And it's just--ironing?)


JAN: Yes Hank,  I think we have a new Fifty Shades of Starch thing happening, here. 


HANK: For the record, I have NEVER loved cleaning the refrigerator, or cleaning anything else. Once I put my spices in alphabetical order, that was fun.  And I arranged my jackets by color. Also fun. That's it, sisters.


HALLIE EPHRON: Don't let me near your laundry. I specialize in shrinking adult clothing to child-sized, turning white things pink, and my ironing skills are minimal. 


I do rather like to weed. Under bushes and around plants, not in the lawn, ever. In fact, I've been known to pull wturn a eeds from the front yards of complete strangers and our town library. So satisfying, pulling black swallow-wort by the roots. I can't help myself. 


JAN: Weeding, really? That's the reason I hate gardening. I can be somewhat upbeat about the planting (despite the dirty fingernails), but it's the relentless need to weed that makes me want to pave the yard.


JULIA SPENCER-FLEMING: For me, it's organizing. Which is ironic, as I may be the least organized woman in the state of Maine. But under pressure from deadlines or a particularly knotty plot problem, I will line up spices by alphabetical order, separate all the different types of bath products into coordinating containers, and convert an unsightly heap of papers into a stack of labeled manilla folders. 

I suspect it's the sense of instant accomplishment that makes these menial tasks so compelling. All of us do work that takes months and sometimes years to complete. Being able to start and finish a job in an hour or two? That's heaven.


LUCY BURDETTE: Laundry. Utterly satisfying to start with an enormous pile of dirty clothes, herd them through washer and dryer (or out on the line if the weather holds), and then fold into neat piles. Ironing? Only if absolutely necessary. I have perfected the art of extracting a shirt from the dryer to hang at just the right moment so the wrinkles are minimized.


In fact I've done four loads today when I NEED to be writing...


RHYS BOWEN: Oh dear--ironing? Cleaning the refrigerator? Have I stepped into the wrong universe here? I was once being interviewed and the interviewer was listing my accomplishments and said "is there anything you can't do?" And I replied "Ironing." Me neither she said.
My mother ironed everything. Sheets. My father's underpants. I am terrible at it. Maybe if it gave me success and satisfaction I would do it more. 
But polishing furniture--that's a menial task I do enjoy. So satisfying to see it gleaming. And sitting on the balcony with a glass of chilled wine, shelling peas or preparing other vegetables... that's okay too!
Yours from the Olympics where I saw badminton today!


JAN: We are SO JEALOUS!! (not about the furniture polishing, about the Olympics -- although I have to admit to enjoying polishing furniture - even though I rarely do it.)


ROSEMARY HARRIS: I think I have an iron ....somewhere. The last time I was moved to use it was for a tablecloth. As I recall I got a big rust stain on it and had to use a different one. Wrinkled, but no one noticed.


Weeding is definitely a good one. But my go-to mindless activity, any time of the year, is rearranging the furniture. The anchors stay the same - sofa, bed and three enormous armoires, but anything else is fair game. End tables, coffee tables, shelf units, my office. Collections of... things. What's amazing to me is how much I always love the new arrangement - even if it's the same as it was a year or so before.


DEBORAH CROMBIE: I can't iron.  I have very few things that need ironing, and if it must be done, I ask my husband, who is a crack ironer. (Is that a word?) But I'm afraid that I, like Jan, fall into the cleaning out the fridge category. I've just finished a brutal week of revisions, where I've not had time to cook or to shop, and I am completely brain dead.  What I need is a long nap.  What I did was clean out the frig.  It's sort of a fresh-start thing, isn't it?
-- 


JAN:  The weeding I just don't get. But even though I NEVER do it myself, I can see the appeal of room-rearranging. But as Debs clearly understands, it could never stack up to the nirvana of tossing out expired sour cream and scrubbing the vegetable bin.


Okay, we've all bared our souls about our lower-order brain machinations, but how about you -- what dull, routine, dirty, stupid or downright Susy Homemaker task brings you inner peace?