Saturday, January 9, 2016

All I Wanted for Christmas was....

RHYS: I don't know about you, but I always feel  bit down after the holidays. We had a house full for Christmas, then my kids went their separate ways and I was left with a mountain of laundry, a fridge full of unidentifiable leftovers and various items of clothing under beds left by various grandchildren.

Also it's been a tough time recently as several close friends are battling major health problems. When we reach a certain age we realize that we are not immortal and worse still, our loved ones are not immortal. So today I felt we needed a bit of frivolity. Every year I browse the catalogs to find the most ridiculous items. And this year was especially full of items I did NOT want for Christmas:

At the top of the list was this hippe sofa. Made a handcrafted leather and a mere $90,000. Who in the world wants a sofa that looks like a hippopotamus ? It also looks distinctly uncomfortable. So thank you, dear family, for not treating me to this.  If I had that sort of money to play with, I could think of better things to spend it on!

Next is the 8 foot high inflatable Olaf from Frozen. I am not a big fan of outdoor ornaments, although a couple of lighted deer on the lawn can look tasteful and in keeping with the season. But an eight foot inflatable Disney character? Uh--no thank you.

Drones were a big item this year, but drone mistletoe? Can you imagine being at a party and having to duck rather than having your head cut off each time it flies over?

I was tempted by the $9,000 rocking zebra...

Who thinks of these things? And more to the point, who buys them?
I have to confess that there was one novelty that I really loved this year. My friends held a surprise birthday party for me at a restaurant and the centerpiece of the cake was a plastic tulip. And when it was lit it sent out a rocket that almost caught the ceiling on fire, then opened into a merry-go-round of revolving candles while playing "Happy Birthday to You."  Such a surprise and made everyone laugh for ages.

So please share: did you see any gifts this year that you were glad you didn't get? Did you GET any gifts this year you wish you hadn't?
p.s. I like fruitcake, especially the traditional English moist Christmas cake. Yum.

16 comments:

Joan Emerson said...

Oh, goodness, I’d be passing on the Hippo Sofa, too . . . and the Olaf snowman [although we did buy a relatively small Mickey Mouse last year when our Colorado grandchildren were coming for the holidays. Despite never having been to the Land of Little Mouse Ears, the youngest absolutely adores Mickey and was beside himself with happiness to see Mickey sitting on the front porch, just waiting for him. Definitely a good thing,]

Thankfully, there were no hoverboards under our tree [or any of the grandchildren’s trees]; all of the gifts under our trees were greatly appreciated . . . .

Hallie Ephron said...

I like fruitcake, too, and hold the garden gnomes... Our biggest gift this year was to our granddaughter, a set of blocks. To ourselves, consumeables (homemade candy, soap, cookies, nuts, a bottle of aged tawny port...)

Anonymous said...

I'm for simplicity and natural in my life , so no excentric gifts for myself or mines.
Like fruitcake too , received one homemade : very good . Gave dattes squares to friends and family.
Books and puzzles to children .
Best gift from me to me: Away in a manger. Yay, loved it.
Danielle-momo. (Can't post otherwise than anonymous)

Karen in Ohio said...

I'm mystified at why fruitcake has such a bad rap. This was the first year in 35 I didn't make some to share, and our friends who usually get it were so disappointed.

That hippo sofa screams "nouveau riche with no taste at all", doesn't it? Talk about your elephant in the room.

I've finally successfully convinced all but one of my children and my mother not to buy me anything. And my daughter gave me, of all things, gingerbread spatulas. I'm saving them to give back to her someday.

We gave each other the gift of my husband finally having a smartphone, and I got the same one, so we could "help each other" learn how to use them.

Susan Elia MacNeal said...

The hippo sofa is awful! and 90K? Seriously?

Hank Phillippi Ryan said...

The sofa is..hilarious. And a little scary.

And you know, those inflatable things are simply terrifying. Right out of Stephen King. I have often thought--and I guess this is proof I am procrastinating--about WHO invented those? And WHY? They are hideous in every way.

ANd Christmas seems so far away now. Strange.

A gingerbread spatula? A spatula FOR gingerbread? Or made out of gingerbread? xox

Karen in Ohio said...

It's a spatula in the shape of a gingerbread boy. It's so me, right?

Liz Boeger, NE of Rattlesnake, FL said...

Thanks for this fun post. What a great way to send the holidays packing!

No surprises under the tree this year except our warmer than usual Florida weather and maybe the tree itself, both in a good way. I finally found the courage to relinquish control of choosing the tree. My son and his girlfriend took on the adventure and produced a lovely eight footer with just the right rustic quirkiness to satisfy my picky taste.

The only unwanted gift was the self-inflicted weight gain from the fudge, cookies, and homemade candies I made and helped consume. But, that was just so I could have a New Year's resolution ready, right?

FChurch said...

There is a house in the nearby town--I swear I am not making this up--they apparently own EVERY inflatable Christmas-themed yard thingy--along with hundreds of light-up Christmas cane yard ornaments, etc. I am willing to bet, although I can't prove it, that their house is filled with those Christmas-themed bears, Santas, reindeer, etc., that play music, dance, and Ho-Ho-Ho if you squeeze some part of them.

Deb Romano said...

"Please tell me that's not a sofa", I said to myself when I looked at the picture. I don't know what else to say about it!

It has been years since I've had fruitcake. I always liked it.

Gram said...

My Mom made a fruitcake that I liked..the dried up ones in the tin...not so much.

Mary Sutton said...

I'll skip the hippo sofa, thanks. And the inflatable Olaf since we've got a bias against anything from FROZEN in our house.

I didn't get many gifts this year, so nothing I'd classify as "wish I hadn't."

And I've never had a fruitcake that tasted anything but awful.

Anonymous said...

We do an adult gift exchange and once a child turns 18 they become part of it......we have seen the gifts become increasingly bizarre and funny over the years as our first wave of grandchildren came of age (we still have some who are toddlers). My husband ended up with, at the end of the swap this year, a toilet seat coffee cup complete with the tank with the handle! Can you envision sipping your black coffee in the morning out of that receptacle???? Imagination is a powerful thing :). One of our daughter-in-laws suggested we forgo the coffee experience and put a small potted plant in the "toilet bowl" and hide it in the bathroom. Brilliant......guests have emerged saying...."how cute is that......where on earth did you find it???? :)
Helen

storytellermary said...

I'll gladly accept fruitcake, but no hippo sofa, please. I do have some small hippo toys from family because of the Hippo song. My favorite gift was an "I solemnly swear I am up to no good" necklace from my friend's BucketOCrafts Etsy site,
https://www.etsy.com/listing/259757775/marauders-necklace
and second favorite is a knitted shrug that was a joint effort of my sister, niece, and great-niece.
Thanks for the laughs and more reasons for gratitude.

Kait said...

I like fruitcake. The real kind steeped in rum. My mother used to make it in a special pan. I remember it wrapped in cheesecloth before she iced it. Wonderful stuff.

Ya gotta wonder about the decor that goes with the hippo sofa.Perhaps a giraffe recliner. Anyone else remember sheep hassocks? Fit right in.

Loved all my prezzies this year, but I do remember the year my husband asked me if I wanted a microwave oven (they were relatively new at the time) and I told him he didn't know me well enough to give me appliances! Even after all these years, it still holds true.

One of our neighbors has a blow up Santa on a motorcycle. Very festive. Those blow up things scare me too.

Cat Aguilar said...

I love fruit cake too ! When my mom was going to classes to become an American citizen she had a Brit classmate and she opened our eyes and palates to fruit cake! The Hippo couch is hilarious and if I was rich I would buy it just to watch people laugh at it!! I had a house full of grand too and have since found shoes, charging cords and various tops and socks!! All of which they claimed they must have back ASAP and I spent a small fortune mailing them ! I mostly got gift cards which was wonderful. My mom who is 85 gave me used potholders. Hmmm .. still not sure what that all means. For my self I bought a Mother's ring- the old one doesn't fit anymore and then I also bought a grandmother ring with the 8 birthstones! All around a wonderful Christmas experience