JENN McKINLAY: One of my very favorite people to see at conferences, partly to see what she's wearing, but mostly because I adore this mid-century modern gal is Diane Vallere! She's here to chat with us about collaboration, and I'm sure by the end of the blog you will adore her as much as I do if you don't already! Take it, Diane!
DIANE VALLERE: Thank you so much for hosting me on Jungle Red! (and guess what? The phrase “Jungle Red” appears in LOVER COME HACK. #tribute!)
There are two types of people in this world: those who work well with others and those who don’t. That’s not to say people don’t try to work together, or always choose to do everything themselves, but some people are just not cut out for collaboration.
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Diane repaints her kitchen! |
Take me, for example. With an ever-growing to-do list, a mountain of projects in my head and on paper, and an awareness that I can only do so many things (well) at a time, I would love to have help. Yet when push comes to shove, my first thought is: I know what I want, and I can do it faster myself.
This may not be the healthiest attitude.
There was one time that I wanted to redo the kitchen. I waited until I had a weekend alone and took on the task by myself. Was it fun? Yep. Did I enjoy the alone time to work (and break) at my own pace? You betcha.
And then there are the times I do my own taxes. Are they fun? Heck to the no. Yet I’ve done them more than once.
In defense of anyone who has ever thought it would be faster/easier/less hassle to take on one additional project themselves, I’ll point out that it isn’t that we think others are less qualified. In most cases, we know the opposite is likely true. And as I sit here thinking about the subject, and the countless times I’ve asked the universe for help while plowing through my list, I would go so far as to say it’s not a quality of work thing, or a saving-money-paying-people thing, but a trust thing. In that if I take a project on myself, I trust that it’ll get done.
Oh, but there are so many flaws to this logic!
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Diane's Kitchen Drawers! |
You fellow do-it-all-yourselfers out there: have you ever felt that twinge of jealousy when you saw what a professional could do versus your own efforts? Have you ever banged your head against the table trying to figure out something that wasn’t second nature? Have you ever needed—yes, I said needed—a glass of wine after finishing something simply to celebrate the fact that you never have to tackle that particular project again?
The true test: have you ever turned down an offer of help because you were too scared of what it would mean to accept it?
And you ask-for-help-all-the-time folks: does it stress you out to ask? Do you feel indebted to those who help you? Is there a bigger, grand karmic swap meet where you feel like it all evens out in the end? Inquiring minds want to know.
I live in awe of the people who can ask and receive help. Not by manipulating with guilt or paying mass amounts of money, but simply by with, “hey, can you help me with this?” It seems like a nice way to live. Maybe one of these days I’ll try it.
In LOVER COME HACK, Madison Night finds herself collaborating with a friend. And Madison, to date, has been a DIY kind of person. The collaboration brings up all sorts of issues in Madison’s personal fiber, ending in some not-particularly-desired outcome.
So, how about you, Reds and Readers, can you ask for help or are you a do it aloner?
About LOVER COME HACK:
After a falling out with a friend flips interior decorator Madison Night’s world inside out, she’s determined to revamp her life. Jane Strong, fellow mid-century modern enthusiast, encourages Madison’s entry in an upcoming design competition, but their rift makes collaboration no longer an option.
When Jane is found dead, Madison tops the suspect list. And when anonymous computer hackings interfere with both the investigation and the competition, Jane’s murder no longer seems random. With a mess of a love life, an angry client, and a looming deadline on her contest entry, Madison turns to an unlikely ally to decode a motive before a crash becomes imminent.
Diane’s Bio:
After two decades working for a top luxury retailer, Diane Vallere traded fashion accessories for accessories to murder. She is a three-time Lefty Award nominee for best humorous mystery and a past president of Sisters in Crime. She started her own detective agency at age ten and has maintained a passion for shoes, clues, and clothes ever since.
Preorder Contest:
To celebrate the release of LOVER COME HACK, Diane is giving away a house! A reissue of a 1962 Barbie Dream House, to be specific. Get the scoop here (and get a peek at chapter one while you’re there!) https://dianevallere.com/lover-come-hack Good luck!
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