Saturday, December 24, 2022

The Reds Are Not Afraid of Controversy!

 HANK PHILLIPPI RYAN:  Do I dare?

I dare. 

It is more controversial than  "is the dress black and gold or white and blue?" 


It is more controversial than deciding whether a hot dog is a sandwich.


It is more controversial than deciding if oatmeal is cereal. Or whether chili is soup.


It is more controversial than the positioning of the toilet paper on the roll.


Here we go. 

No matter if you celebrate or not:

IS IT ACCEPTABLE TO OPEN PRESENTS ON CHRISTMAS EVE?


In my (Jewish) family, (where we celebrated everything), my mother absolutely laid down the law. 

NO WAY. 

We whined, we wheedled, we attempted to negotiate. Just one, we begged. A little one. 

"Nope nope nope,"  she would say. 

And it never happened.

How about you, Reds and readers?  (And of course a hot dog is a sandwich. It's "meat" in bread.)






101 comments:

  1. Open Christmas presents on Christmas Eve? Sure.
    For years, we celebrated Christmas at Easter time because that was when John could get vacation time from the police department and we could come east to share Christmas decorations, Christmas dinner, and Christmas presents with our family. So, if you want to open presents on Christmas Eve, why not? The date doesn't matter . . . it's the being together with family that counts.

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    1. I love that! It’s all about the family!

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  2. The dress is gold and white.

    Growing up, we opened presents with my dad's side of the family on Christmas Eve, then the rest of Christmas Day. Now, we just open them on Christmas Day. It's nice to have them to look forward to that day, but it was always so hard as a kid. Even knowing I'd get to open some on Christmas Eve didn't really help at all.

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    1. Very wise method of organization! And yes about the dress, sometimes I agree with you. And then it changes.

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  3. Traditionally Mom would let us open 1 small present on Christmas Eve. This year she gave us each something early : super-cute red & white Christmas pajamas in a Fair Isle-type pattern.

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    1. So cute! That’s a great idea to open something on Christmas Eve that you can wear on Christmas day.!

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    2. Love these Christmas pajamas. Warm and cozy. Diana

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  4. Of course it’s ok 😊. Growing up, presents were on Christmas Eve in Dad’s family and he carried on the tradition. As farmers, the late afternoon of Christmas Eve was his time off; the hired hands spent Christmas Day with their families.

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    1. That is the best of reasons! I love imagining that! Xxx

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  5. I stand by the one-present-on-Christmas-Eve tradition. When I was a child, it was always the gift from our distant grandmother, and it was always new (hand-made) flannel nightgowns or PJs. I continued the tradition with my boys. One year I made them matching flannel PJs with pointy nightcaps. They LOVED those nightcaps!

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    1. What an adorable image! Xxxx

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    2. And how is Hugh?

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    3. He is starting to feel better and is back to eating actual food as well as soup. We play masked cribbage every afternoon. Thanks for asking!

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  6. Here in Portugal, Christmas Eve is the big celebration. People open presents, have quite a feast with traditional dishes and stay up until midnight. Christmas Day they sleep late and have another big meal. But the 24th is the big one.

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    1. Have a wonderful wonderful day!

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  7. As a youngster, we did not open gifts on Christmas Eve. As an adult, gifts were opened as they arrived. I never considered that a hot dog is a sandwich, it was just a hot dog.

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    1. Oh, that is another great controversy! I never open gifts as they arrive, and my husband things. I am so silly! Love you, dear Dru!

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  8. the above comment is from me, Dru Ann

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  9. Sometimes it is just as difficult to wait when you are the giver. My first Hanukah with Irwin was so much fun because I had something for every night, including a 2 inch tall wind up gorilla that walked and sparked. Hmm, I wonder if we still have it somewhere.
    In any case, we always exchanged gifts after lighting the candles, both when I was little and with our own kids.

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    1. Yes, Hanukkah is always..controversial. (Look for the gorilla!) On the last night, my mom used to try to foist off tiny gifts--like a pack of Juicy Fruit--and we'd all complain. Poor mom. We were such annoying children...

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    2. It's all how you sell it. I labeled each night of Hanukkah with a theme and one night was gum night. But I did give them something cool like Big Chew or a bunch of different flavors, and I didn't buy them gum most of the rest of the year. --Karen Salemi

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  10. Growing up, presents were opened Christmas morning, then all day long as we grew up and kids arrived at my parents throughout the day.

    Older nephew began a tradition of his own with his son--one special gift brought by Sprinkles the elf on Christmas Eve. I have the most adorable photo of him--aged 5--asleep on the couch on the evening of Christmas Eve, clutching his new baby Yoda in his arms.

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  11. Well, since we used to do the big family gathering on Christmas Eve, it was at least technically okay to open some presents on Christmas Eve. But if you mean within the immediate family, we were allowed to open one present on Christmas Eve when we were kids. Otherwise it was Christmas Day only for unwrapping.

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    1. Yes, and Eve opening seems like such a good idea at the time, then Christmas morning is...changed.

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  12. My husband's family's tradition was to open gifts Christmas eve.

    My parents relented one childhood Christmas, and of course all us kids were disappointed Christmas morning. So, never again.

    Now it all depends on what day we can get together -- before or after Christmas.

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  13. A hot dog is not a sandwich; as Dru Ann says, it's just a hot dog. As for gifts, we opened only on Christmas Day, but when we lived in Germany my best friend gave me a present especially to open on Christmas Eve because that was the tradition in her family (and maybe the whole country?). In my family, we opened our stockings first things Christmas morning, but kept the presents under the tree for after the big meal. The anticipation was so exciting!

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    1. Yes, that is a great way to look at it! ANd the stocking were always so great.. Did you dump them, or take things one at a time?

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    2. Could be considered a taco.

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    3. No dumping of the stocking! One item, pulled out slowly and opened one at a time. Prolong the excitement!

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    4. Heather, a hot dog is a taco??? YOu are SO right. But whoa.

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  14. We could open stockings and one gift on Christmas morning, then we had to get dressed for breakfast and do the rest after that!

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  15. On Christmas Eve we (4 kids & parents) had to do a skit, or sing a xmas song, or play an instrument or some kind, etc. before we could open a gift on Christmas Eve. It was a fun tradition that we still do after 60+ years.

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  16. No presents on Christmas Eve, while growing up. Christmas morning we had our stockings, our big Santa present, breakfast, and then the rest of the presents. My husband’s parents did the Italian Christmas feast with the fish and we exchanged presents then. Now it’s fill each other’s stocking after Christmas Eve service, whilst having a nightcap, and presents Christmas morning. Suzette C.

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  17. No presents until Christmas when my Mom was around. Now my friend and I do whatever we want to, because we’re making our own new traditions now. Right now we are working around with old-fashioned Christmas music playing on the tv.

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  18. Whatever is the tradition in your family is the 'correct' way. Trouble, of course arises when a person whose tradition is waiting until the day and not one second before, marries a person of the opposite persuasion. Then, I think, it is best if they can come up with their own unique tradition.

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    1. Compromise! An id kinda sounds like a good rom com premise... Jenn???

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    2. We were allowed to open one present on Christmas Eve -- often something that we'd wear to church that night (when we were old enough to go), otherwise something that the giver just couldn't WAIT for the receiver to get. That was a good lesson in anticipation and gratitude alike. The rest of the presents were for Christmas morning. This year I've had a throwback -- a friend made me a stocking just because the design reminded her of me when we first met (i.e., still me), and filled it with several wrapped and unwrapped things. It came on the 18th, and I made it with the last piece until yesterday!
      P.S. The dress is white and gold in the photo above, and that's a proper hot dog for me, just mustard. I've never taken the time to figure out whether it's a sandwich, it's LUNCH.

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  19. In my family with my children, one on Christmas Eve, the rest Christmas morning. But growing up, we opened them ALL on Christmas Eve.

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  20. Growing up, NO presents were opened on Christmas Eve. Our family waited until early Christmas morning.

    A hot dog is just a hot dog, not a sandwich.
    And I see a blue & black dress.

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    1. We'll have to talk about the hot dog. ANd SOMETIMES I agree with you about the dress. And score one for Christmas morning! xx

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  21. When I was growing up, the rule was NO presents on Christmas Eve. We did stockings in the morning, breakfast, then presents. We are much more loosey-goosey now. Some years we open on Christmas Eve, some on Christmas Day. For the last few years, we've been doing stocking stuffers only--very enjoyable. Tonight we are getting together for a light early meal and then Christmas Eve church for those who want (probably just my two sisters and me) and tomorrow for a big dinner and presents.

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  22. From Nan McCann: My mom’s side of the family were German, and so we opened presents on Christmas Eve after the large traditional Christmas dinner (with egg nog beforehand). Then we celebrated with my dad’s family on Christmas Day, opening gifts from them. I always thought it rather clever, because my parents got to sleep late on Christmas Day as I’d already opened their gifts and my grandparents’ gifts… and was perfectly happy!

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    1. Egg nog. A whole nother blog. (It sounds so awful...) Love your traditions!

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  23. The dress is both white and gold and blue and black. It is actually blue and black. If a person sits long enough the white and gold will morph to the true colors. In classifying the world, it goes like this 1. Food 2 Sandwich 3 Hot dog. (you're welcome) Sixty-three years ago my family invented grocery bag Christmas. Mother was too ill for the wrap presents part. We got grocery bags put all the gifts for each person in their bag and said here ya go!

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    1. OH! Kingdom, phylum family...PERFECT! You always know, Coralee! ANd now grocery bags are superchic!

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  24. What fun! White and gold for me!

    It depended on where we were celebrating Christmas. At home we followed the German tradition that Santa brought the tree, decorated it, and left the presents so it we opened one present when we returned from Mass, the rest on Christmas morning. I don't want to think about how crazy my father was getting that tree up, decorated, and stocked in the time we were gone to Mass. Even with that, as the youngest, I put on the tree topper and two special ornaments.

    If we were at my great grandparents, we followed a French tradition. We didn't have a tree - but we did have a yule log, and presents were left by our beds to be found in the morning. Either way, Santa found us!

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    1. Kait, you are the only person I have ever met who had Santa bring her tree on Christmas Eve! Our tradition derived from strict and devote Episcopalian mothers and grandmothers and greatgrandmothers: before Christmas Eve only the Season of Advent. Elisabeth

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    2. WOnderful traditions! And yes, I bet they had to scramble!

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  25. HANK, when I was a young child, I always looked forward to opening Christmas gifts on Christmas Day. I remember trying to catch Santa Claus then I fell asleep before Santa Claus climbed down our chimney to deliver Christmas gifts, I remember waking up in the morning and opening Christmas gifts. My parents heard me and came into my room. Yes, the Christmas tree was in my bedroom that year.

    Always loved opening Christmas gifts. It did not really matter if it was Christmas Eve or Christmas Day or Boxing Day once I became a teenager.

    In the last few years, we started a new tradition after we learned about the Icelandic tradition of opening gifts (books!!!!) on Christmas Eve. Reading good books and eating chocolate on Christmas Eve. These days I eat Gingerbread cookies instead. As much as I love Chocolate, it does not like me. LOL

    Hank, how old were you when you learned that you were Jewish, if I may ask?

    Diana

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    1. We all tried to catch Santa, I bet! ANd love the Icelandic tradition, which right now I will not try to spell. How old? AH...maybe.. gosh, I don't know. Five?

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  26. Shalom Reds and readers –
    ----------Growing up the tradition in our house was to decorate the tree in our small apartment living-room on Christmas Eve. Somehow my parents got me and my two brothers to bed by 8 or 9 pm. (We found it incredibly “hard to sleep”.) Then my parents would stay up late, wrapping a gazillion presents and placing them under the tree. The three of us, then, would be up at the crack-of-dawn, gawking at the tree until we could cajole our parents into getting out of bed.
    ----------My parents were not religious. My mother was Jewish; so, I think she just went along with my dad’s family tradition. We would open most of our presents before any meal of the day. My dad always had a steady job. So, we weren’t poor. The rent was always paid. We always owned a car. There was always food on the table and in the refrigerator. But now as an adult, I marvel, looking back at those Christmases, how my parents must have sacrificed, in order to put all those gifts under the tree each year.
    ---------When I was about 10. I asked to go to Hebrew school. About 5 hours of religious training each week during the school year. So, Hanukkah was added to our repertoire. No gifts. Just candles and latkes.
    ----------My birthday is in December, and I mostly give myself my own gifts. This year, I splurged all month and spent more money than I should have to buy myself stuff. My best friend has three grandchildren aged 5 and below. So today, I will wrap presents (picture books) and bring them to Christmas dinner tomorrow. In my sixties, I added lighting Hanukkah candles to my yearly traditions. I was actually born on the first night of Hanukkah.
    ----------I haven’t been to church regularly, since the beginning of the pandemic. Before that, I was pretty regular about that each week. I wonder if I should change that in the new year. I don’t make a lot of New Year’s resolutions. But perhaps, I can make that end-of-year gift to myself this year.

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    1. SO wonderful to hear from you! And that's a very lovely thought for your resolution...xx

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  27. I remember when I was a teen my mom and I would go to our neighbor's house on Christmas Eve and put out their presents while the parents took the kids to evening mass. I thought they were so lucky to open their presents the night before as in my family that was a big NO. Of course it could be because my mom spent every Christmas Eve night in her room wrapping like a maniac. LOL.

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    1. NOw that--is veryi interesting. I think.my mother (Santa) never wrapped presents. I can't remember it, if she did. Hm. I went through a big phase of loving to wrap--it is so gratifying. Especially if the gift is rectangular. :-)

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  28. I think it was an attempt to teach you patience, right, that’s what my mother always said. Instant gratification is something you don’t want your children to learn, right? Maybe?

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  29. Yeah, my mom and Jenn's were on the same page. She HATED wrapping and waited until the last minute to do it. It wasn't until I was in college that I realized in some houses, Santa left wrapped gifts. (He doesn't in mine, either - I've inherited Mom's proclivities.

    Occasionally, our parents gave in to begging and let us open one gift. Except my Mom would pick it out - and it was always, always pajamas. :-D

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    1. My mother was still wrapping in the car as we drove the 12 miles to grandparents’ home for Christmas dinner (at noon). Elisabeth

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    2. That's hilarious, Elisabeth! And hey, Julia, pajamas are good!

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  30. When there was Santa coming, both growing up and for my kids, it was open gifts from one another on Christmas Eve and Santa on Christmas morning. I hate to report that my Covid test was positive yesterday, so I am on the couch or in the bed for Christmas. I’m not too sick, but I was awake a lot last night coughing. Husband is getting me some cough medicine today. We will miss Christmas with my daughter and her family, and our son won’t be able to visit, but we will have our Christmas later. On the up side of things, I had already made my chocolate cherry cake yesterday before my testing, so it looks like more cake for me. I’m going to talk husband through fixing the scalloped oysters and broccoli casserole. Maybe mashed potatoes, too. I am going to sleep a bit now, in view of my lack of it last night. It may not be the Christmas I planned, but I am actually looking forward to a quiet little Christmas. Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays to all you wonderful Reds and commenters who make this a lovely start to each day!

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    1. you are so wise and strong. Thank you for sharing. You will be on my medical meditation list until I hear back from you. Thank you for all that you have given over the last year.

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    2. Be well soon, Kathy. And May your coaching result in the perfect Christmas feast… or at least a tasty one. Elisabeth

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    3. This is Kathy. Thanks for your get-well wishes. I've slept a lot today, but I'm giving "Love It or List It" a go now. My doggie, Lulu, has missed me while I was in bed, so I'm sitting in the living room with her now.

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    4. Kathy, covid for Christmas? That's ..unfair, to say the least. Take it easy, pamper yourself and get well soon

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  31. Hank, with Santa bringing the tree on Christmas Eve, along with all the presents, this question never arose. Christmas morning is for Christmas presents. Even after Santa stopped bringing the tree: Christmas morning, which morphed into all Christmas day, was for opening presents. Have a wonderful day tomorrow, Reds and Commenters. Elisabeth

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    1. Sounds like my family when I was a child! Because we’re spread all over now, and often need to ship gifts to siblings living elsewhere, opening gifts happens when I get to see the ones who live closer.

      DebRo

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  32. Brenda, your candy Christmas feast, reminds me of my mother’s description of her childhood Christmases. Her father declared that her mother had worked hard enough all December long making Christmas happen for him and the four girls, so “no cooking on Christmas Day.” Mother remembered the day as a candy and cookies and cake feast! Elisabeth

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  33. Yes, it can be Christmas morning whenever you want! ANd whoa, that is a LOT of food! xxxx

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  34. Well, that dress looks blue and gold to me. I don't think that was one of the options. My family always opened presents Christmas morning. Mom told us she lived out in the country when a child and Santa came early there so they opened their presents on Christmas Eve. She also used to put presents under the tree for relatives who lived elsewhere. The gifts would magically disappear and she'd say Santa came by to pick them up for delivery. I suspect that was a subtle reminder that Santa is watching so behave.

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    1. Blue and gold? Whoa. And your mother sure knew a lot of Santa lore... :-)

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  35. Always Christmas Eve. Even as children my brother and I were night people.

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  36. Growing up, the night before Christmas was when we decorated the tree, which was always enormous. In the morning my mother plugged in the lights for the first time and coming downstairs to it, surrounded by gifts, was pure magic.

    Tonight we'll light 7th Hanukah candle before dinner and eat a delicious dinner. Tomorrow morning we open Xmas presents. Special time. Right now I'm waiting for my kids and grands to arrive. I am cooked- and laundried-out.

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    1. You are a rock star! And they are very lucky. oxoxooo Keep us posted!

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  37. We were usually allowed to open one present on Christmas, but my parents had to pick that one out. No BIG present until Christmas morning. We kept the tradition with my daughter growing up. In our family we do stockings before breakfast Christmas morning, open gifts afterwards. Then Christmas dinner mid-afternoon (or whenever we can get everything cooked...)

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  38. Jim here: I'm very confused by this conversation. How can you open gifts before Santa even comes?

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  39. Rhys: I still have nightmares of assembling bikes and Barbie castles on Christmas Eve after the kids were in bed. No presents opened at our house! And never while I was growing up because Santa brought the presents and he didn’t come until after midnight. We used to listen for sleigh bells!

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  40. The one time I met Santa, three year-old-me asked for a ring, and then, “How are you going to get in? We don’t have a chimney!”

    Needless to say, the back-and-forth ended with the Mall Santa grumbling, “Maybe I just won’t come to your house at all.”

    Since all gifts were up until then, and ever after, labeled as from the actual giver (Mom and Dad, Grandma, etc.) and my family didn’t fill stockings, the whole Santa thing never quite caught on with me.

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    1. That one was from me. We do stockings for my kids, but our pandemic-era tradition continues: all shipped presents stay “wrapped” in the box. It’s eco-friendly and time-saving! And sometimes, among the gifts, we get the replacement fridge filter or something else we ordered ourselves but couldn’t distinguish from other packages.

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    2. Yes, that "wrapped in the box" is definitely a plan! And you made the Santa grub=mble? Whoa, you must have been tough! He could have just said: "It's magic." :-)

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  41. The dress is blue and black, and a sandwich is 2 slices of bread with filling, so not a hot dog. Chili is a kind of stew, not soup, and of course oatmeal is cereal. Whew. Now that we have all that settled....we did not have Christmas in our house, so eve or morning never mattered to me. Jewish holidays begin at sunset so first night of Hanuka was when we got gifts. The rest of the 8 days, we lit candles, recited blessings,sang songs....and once in awhile my parents would slip an extra gift in there or holiday chocolates.Pretty much what we did for our girls.With mailed gifts from distant, doting relatives, there were certainly packages for every night. Tonight, wishing every one a happy holiday of your choice, and year with more health and more peace for all !!!!

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    1. Yes, and to you, took darling friend! (Why isn't a hot dog a filling? :-) )

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    2. A hot dog bun is not 2 slices of bread :-)

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    3. Oh....so a hamburger isn't a sandwich either? ANd I want you to know I just laughed out loud. xxx

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  42. My father was a first generation American, parents came here from Germany around 1895. And Lutheran of course. They celebrated on Christmas Eve so that was also my growing up tradition. Christmas morning was for making the trip to my grandparents for lots of food and more presents!

    My children had to wait until the morning which, for them, began about four am. They’ve continued this tradition with their families.

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    1. Yes! Getting up early on Christmas morning is an elemental part of childhood, if you're lucky! xx

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  43. It depends. (How's that for prevarication?) Our experience is about where the family is at during the holiday. Are some of them leaving early Christmas morning? Open them them on Christmas Even. As kids past the age of believing in Santa, my parents allowed us to choose one present to open on Christmas Eve and that assuaged our near exhausting anxiety for both kids and parents. Stockings in the morning then breakfast, cleanup, getting dressed, and making our beds. All had to be done and done well before presents. It drove us crazy, while at the same time, drew out the day and made it more fun. Plus, we had our chores done beforehand so we could play with our gifts after opening. Win win. My mom was the best at creating a memorable Christmas that I try to carry on.

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  44. I think it is up to YOUR family traditions. My parents always allowed us to unwrap one present on Christmas Eve. We all perused our presents for at least a week before Christmas Eve to pick the very one we wanted to open. Nobody wanted to open underwear for that single special event.

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