Jenn McKinlay: The other day the Hub asked me about a decorative tile on the wall. His question: "How long has that been hanging there?"
I glanced at the tile. It was a gift from my mom to commemorate our trip to Florence, Italy in 2007. Yes, the tile has been hanging in the same spot in a doorway for SEVENTEEN YEARS. Now I'm not picking on the Hub, but of the two of us he is less likely to notice things like cat hurl on the floor, a dead houseplant, or where the ketchup is in the refrigerator--this is known as "male refrigerator blindness" in our house.
All teasing aside, I don't think it's a gender issue as I've had female roommates who never noticed the dishes piling up in the sink, the pile of shoes by the door that you had to vault over to enter or exit, or that the guy they were crushing on was just not that into them. Ahem.
Because we're all mystery buffs here and our brains naturally go to crime, I'll share the stats that the levels of accuracy for police lineups is 80% for sequential (one at a time) lineups and 76% for simultaneous lineups. In other words, not great.
And I know that we've all had the experience of witnessing something that the person beside us also observed but saw it completely differently. It can be maddening and you find yourself thinking one of you has the observational skills of a rutabaga and you're positive it's the other person.
Naturally, I had to look for a quiz on observation just to see how I rated. You can find it here: How observant are you?
I was chuffed to get this ranking:
So what makes a person observant? The short answers from the articles I read were curiosity, active listening, mindfulness, and a desire to be constantly learning. I feel as if these traits go hand in hand with being writers and readers.
Now I ask you -- how do you think you rate on the observational scale, Reds and Readers? And if you take the quiz, what did you get?
Surprisingly, I also got an "abnormally observant" rating . . .
ReplyDeleteJudging by the comments, I think that's the default setting. LOL. I'll have to check my over inflated sense of observational skills.
DeleteLooks like there’s a troll here this morning. Elisabeth
ReplyDeleteHopefully, the Reds can block the trolls from commenting. Yesterday's blog has several of these comments.
DeleteSigh...
DeleteIs it set up to tell everyone they're abnormally observant? I don't think I'm abnormal, as I often miss things.
ReplyDeleteThat's the suspicion, although Lucy got something else.
DeleteFun subject! I too have an unobservant spouse. Almost identically, mine asked me about a print on our wall. "When did you get that?" "It was a wedding present." At the time we'd been married 20 years. Now it's 40 but he's not any better. I regularly have to drive our cars and look in any space he uses that I don't frequent, as he is blind to his surroundings. He doesn't notice things like brake lights -- before me he drove his girlfriend's Volvo until it seized up, not seeing the oil light -- or waning light from burned out bulbs. I joke that if I left town for any extended period I might come home to find him huddled around a single working lamp. He is domestically impaired.
ReplyDeleteI notice many things. I can tell almost immediately if any of my animals is off... a sheep in the flock not feeling well. A horse holding himself tensely. A sprung board on the wall of the barn. Peeling paint around the house foundation. All of these things I register as problems I need to address. But I notice almost nothing about people's appearance. After I know someone, it seems I create a picture of them in my mind that does not change. Most infamously, I once asked a teaching colleague in September if she'd cut her hair over the summer. She looked great. She looked at me. "Selden, I lost fifty pounds!" Though as a child I wanted to be a detective, I grew up to know I would be useless.(Selden)
We are the same person, Selden. I'm locked in on animals and surroundings but people - nope.
DeleteI think that I am observant, but I am terrible at remembering names and faces. I can do it as a party trick, but long term, no. Is that something else? As far as refrigerator blindness, yes, that is a real disability specific to husbands!
ReplyDeleteOne thing for sure, little old ladies need to be observant in parking lots, and walking down the street. We are the main targets of opportunistic thugs. Put your phone away. Head up.
Judy, I am the same. I have to meet a person face to face at least five times until I remember them.
DeleteLooks like there’s a troll this morning. Like several comments yesterday!
ReplyDeletePythonax is the troll
ReplyDeleteI am pretty observant, and I got the same quiz result as you, Jenn. I always remember faces and places I have been, but don't ask me about the names of either!
ReplyDeleteI also live with a male pattern unobservant person. He's just too much in his head to notice physical things. I often say I have the "finding gene," but I think it's because I'm observant. In public, some might call it being a voyeur, but that's part of being a writer, right?
Wasn't there a blog where all the writers talked about overhearing conversations and watching public interactions? Story ideas for the taking!
DeleteEdith, I'm not much of a Roseann Barr fan, but early in her career she had a bit in her comedy routine about her husband always wanting her to find things. She said, "Men think the uterus is a tracking device. He can look under the couch cushions for the potato chips as easily as I can."
DeleteThat's hilarious!
DeleteThat IS hilarious!
DeleteMy mother-in-law, who was born in 1910 and fairly straitlaced, got such a kick out of that when I told her!
DeleteLOL - I try not to gender but...I did live with three men who could never find anything!
DeleteMom, where's my...?(fill in the blank!) Honey, have you seen my...?
DeleteI think I am average on the observant scale. I would bomb a police line-up since I am not great at faces.
ReplyDeleteI also got "abnormally observant" on the quiz but I had to guess about the US currency & flag questions!
So, what you're saying is you're a good guesser!
DeletePat D said it best. I'm also an abnormally lucky guesser.
DeleteI got the Abnormally Observant ranking, too. I'm now wondering if it gives everyone the same result. Just an observation. ;-)
ReplyDeleteIt is a suspicion!
DeleteThere has to be something wrong with that test. I got abnormally observant which would be great because who doesn't want to be compared to Sherlock Holmes. But I think I'm more like your husband and wouldn't notice something until years after. But it was fun to play.
ReplyDeleteLOL - it's the music thing, I'm convinced the Hub has music running through his head at all times.
DeleteI like to think of myself as observant, but I have come to rely on the notes I take. Fascinating how memory fixes an incident in one way but the notes prove it happened differently. Thank goodness for pencils and notebooks!
ReplyDeleteso true Amanda! memory can be fickle
DeleteAmanda, I take notes on the books I read, especially the series, so that I can refer back to characters and events that can be part of the following books. It also helps when writing reviews, which I sometimes do.
DeleteToo true, Lucy!
DeleteJudy -- that is a good practice; I have a notebook in which I list books and authors I'm interested in, but, gosh, how sensible you are to take notes on the characters and stories!
That is so smart Judy. I often keep a running list of characters in a book for easy reference. But, keeping it for a series is even better.
DeleteOh, that's so smart, Amanda!
DeleteBTW, I did not get abnormally observant, only just above average!
ReplyDeleteWell that just proves the test is not very accurate Lucy!
DeleteYou're our exception to the rule :)
DeleteI also qualified as abnormally observant. Not surprised in the least!
ReplyDelete*thumbs up*
DeleteIt's not letting me finish for some reason. I think I'm about normal in my ability to observe. I certainly do notice more details if I make the decision to focus.
ReplyDeleteGillian, mine wasn’t letting me finish when I was taking it on my phone (I had started taking it on my iPad). I found I had to hit the button “scroll to the next question” for it to continue. — Pat S
DeletePersnickety little quiz!
DeleteIn our family my daughter and I often describe people including what they were wearing. My husband is always clueless. Now the running joke is, he will just say, “I don’t know. What were they wearing?”
ReplyDeleteLOL!!! That's hilarious!
DeleteThis is a fun topic considering we all love mysteries, which leads me to suspect we enjoy trying to solve the mystery as we read. I grew up with Nancy Drew as my personal hero and would walk around my little town trying to conjur/solve mysteries I would conceive along my paper route or walks to my grandparents’ house. I was raised by an unusually observant father who would help me “hone my skills”. I really wanted to become a detective when I was a kid. Instead I became a mental health therapist. Funny enough, I often use my “detective skills” to help people find effective solutions to their problems in life. I did score abnormally observant on the quiz. I am not surprised at all. My husband often calls me “freakishly observant” about people, places, and things and I love to quiz him when we are out and about because he is freakishly UNobservant about all.the.things (unless it has to do with something mechanical. Then he is suddenly Sherlock!).
ReplyDeleteYou are a very well balanced couple!
DeleteIt says I am Abnormally Observant too! I highly doubt that, but compared with some men I know, it could be true. But I am curious so maybe that helps.
ReplyDeleteCuriosity does seem to be a major factor.
DeleteWell, that test is a bust, if we all get the same result. There's no way to know if you got the right or wrong answer, either. Fun, though!
ReplyDeleteAs for being observant, I notice a lot of things my husband doesn't, but he notices different categories that I don't cue into. We make a good team in that regard. Our youngest daughter is the one who observes, since infancy. While the oldest, a nurse who picks up on others' physical issues, rarely pays attention to outside objects, like the road signs she has passed a million times. It's fascinating.
Years ago we were visiting a friend while another friend and his seven-year old daughter, who we were meeting for the first time, was there. She was drawing pictures, and just before we left she offered one she had drawn of Steve and me. The kitchen we were in was not brightly lit, but she had noticed, somehow, Steve's blue eyes and my green ones. I'm still amazed at this, 45 years later. That is a detail I rarely notice unless the eye color is particularly striking.
Karen in Ohio, children tend to be very observant. Perhaps adults decide which areas to be more observant in?
DeleteDiana, having raised three kids of my own, and having been the oldest of four, I don't think that's always true. My youngest was unusually observant, to the point of being able to speak in full, grammatical sentences by her first birthday. That wasn't something I ever stressed, or you would think the other girls would also have done the same thing.
DeleteMy grandson was obsessed with anything with wheels when he was small, and could tell you what make many a passing car was by age 3. But I really think that was his own interest that caused his focus.
Karen in Ohio. Thank you. I was wondering about that.
DeleteThat's not to say that adults don't influence their kids' focus.
DeleteKaren, my son was really into trains when he was little. Thomas or any kind of trains were his interest from about 18 months until about seven. He could identify any kind of railroad car, etc. because he was so interested in them. Alas, he’s 26 now and remembers that he liked them but no details. (Whereas his father and I can still quote from the Thomas videos!!) — Pat S
DeleteThat was bugging me, too. I wanted to know what I got wrong.
DeletePat S. - H1 was a Thomas kid, too. Hub and I can still name all the trains but can H1? Nope.
DeleteSo funny! We parents get more into it than the kids do.
DeleteOne of the Reds is zapping the trolls before I see them...THANK YOU! I woke up with a second round of revisions in my head so my brain is impaired. LOL.
ReplyDeleteThank you for telling us that, Jenn, because I didn’t know what people were referencing. — Pat S
DeleteI got Abnormally Observant too. Go figure. I'm the one in the family who is always looking for something I've misplaced. If you know you have to be observant you tend to focus in more carefully like for that test.
ReplyDeleteMy granddaughter and grandson are not only observant they notice things that are so subtle the average adult probably wouldn't notice.
That's a talent! I'm always surprised when people don't notice birds singing or other noises in the background.
DeleteWhat's concerning is that witnesses in court cases (including lawyers, police/sheriff, witnesses, etc) are more often than not wrong in their observations. I loved that Miss Marple (Agatha Christie) just sits back and observes human nature.
ReplyDeleteShe is a deceptively complex character. Love her.
DeleteAbnormally Observant for me. I do try to parse out details on a regular basis. Having a photographic memory also helps. Although sometimes I forget to load the film :)
ReplyDeleteLOL!!! That's hilarious.
DeleteI’m abnormally observant ! But I think that’s true. I know where everything is that John can’t find. I’m always noticing other diners’ interactions in restaurants and who looks like a potential terririst when waiting to board a plane. I think if you write mysteries you develop these traits
ReplyDeleteI think so, too. We're always looking for the subtext.
DeleteOh, I can't wait to take this! Back soon!
ReplyDeleteTo my surprise, I scored as Abnormally Observant. I always notice lots of details, but they’re generally not the important ones, in my opinion! I do like to ask lots of questions, though.
ReplyDeleteDebRo
I think asking questions is an underrated life skill.
DeleteMy Quiz result was "Abnormally observant". Wonder if everyone, who took this quiz, received the same result?
ReplyDeleteAs a child, I was very observant. Now that I am a grown up, I would like to think that I am still observant. I think children are more observant than grown ups? I do remember a grown up noticing that I, as a child, did not like something from looking at my facial expressions, even though she did not know sign language.
Like Rhys, I notice people's interactions in restaurants (before the pandemic). And potential terrorists on planes and public places. I also notice who are NSIT (not safe in taxicabs).
Agree that if you write mysteries, you develop the traits of observing people. And many years ago, when I mentioned to a friend that I was writing a novel, they asked me many questions about the room that we were in. They wanted me to describe what I saw in the room.
I dunno. I went to take the test. Supposedly about being observant and the first question was, Do You Practise Mindfulness? (and yes, I did notice they spelled it "practice") but there was no answer choice for "no."
ReplyDeleteThe second one could be answered by looking back at the first one.
So that was that.
Susan D
I think of myself as average on the observant scale. Oddly, the quiz said Abnormally Observant.
ReplyDeleteThen again, I'm usually the one with the answer when The Hubby asks, "Where is the...?"
One more wife who knows where he left his sunglasses! Yay!
DeleteJust last night:
DeleteHim: "Where are my glasses? I left them right here."
Me: "They're on the table by the chair."
Him: "......"
LOL, Liz. Just as we were saying.
DeleteQuestion: Is there a connection between your observant skills and your work? If you are a fashion designer or an artist or an actor or wear cosmetics, does that make you more observant than someone whose work does Not rely on visual cues?
ReplyDeleteMy Mum noticed that her niece, at a very young age, knew how to put on lipstick without making a mess, and I thought that required excellent observation skills and motor skills?
Abnormally observant!
ReplyDeleteThe quiz thinks I'm Abnormally Observant. That's probably true. When my son was small, I could always tell when he was lying. His dad even told him one time to give it up, Mom always knows when you're lying. There must be something in the body language that I pick up on because I don't knowingly go looking for it. True story: My son came home from school with blood streaming down his hand. I asked what happened. He said he was knifed on the bus. I told him to try again. Then he said someone cut him. I just washed away the blood and said, try again. Finally, the truth came out - his finger got caught between the metal seat back and the top of the seat and he sliced it open pulling it free. Sigh...boys. And an ER visit for stitches. Observation: Rush hour is a surprisingly quiet time at the ER.
ReplyDeleteWhen I was working, one of my strengths was bringing order to chaos. I thrived in that atmosphere, so I suspect it must be because of observational skills that pick up on what isn't working and zones in on how to fix it. Once I had everything up and running well, I got bored. Go figure.
Maybe your son was embarrassed that his finger got caught between the metal seat back and the top of the seat?
DeleteMost likely. He was always an embellisher, and I think he also wanted to see how mom would react to the knife comment. After all, it was kinda lame to admit to something so silly. -- Victoria
DeleteVictoria, even the mild mannered ones can look for a bit of drama once in a while. I knew if my kid was creating a scene, too.
DeleteOops - that was Victoria
ReplyDeleteDeana here - Abnormally observant - hmm - I know for the past two days I've had to go searching for the correct days blog. I normally use my Kindle but it seems to be stuck on "over the river and through the woods" from Julia on Saturday. My phone too. Maybe they, the blog gremblins, want me to use my laptop, which I am but I can't remember how to get me from anonymous. Oh well, now back reading everyone's comments.
ReplyDeleteSomething is technically wrong with the blogger link, specifically the Jungle Red web site, in Safari. I am having the same issue. I switched to Firefox and the issue disappeared.
DeleteWell, shoot. I did the quiz, then when I clicked on "Finish" nothing happened. I'm going to assume that I'm Abnormally Observant!
ReplyDeleteI, too, got Abnormally Observant which is a bit of a stretch. My husband is more observant than I am — about some things. He’s an accountant and always says he’s paid to be observant. But he’s got the same refrigerator blindness other people have commented on with their husbands. I notice grammar and punctuation errors. As to the world around me, I notice differences (like a tree that’s been cut back or removed because I can see more sky), but miss things like which side men’s vs. women’s shirts buttons are on (I just knew they were different). — Pat S
ReplyDeleteI'm abnormally observant, according to the quiz. More like abnormally lucky on some of my guesses. Definitely abnormally suspicious of the validity of this quiz.
ReplyDeleteAbnormally observant. H-m-m-m…I’d been observant and wants to be better but not abnormally. I wonder who the model was for regularly observant? Or is it because we all read mysteries? 😊
ReplyDeleteI got Abnormally Observant
ReplyDeleteThat was fun! I'm another "abnormally observant" -- something I alreayd knew about myself. I mean: I'm a BIRDER! I write CRIME NOVELS. However I'd probably also score as "abnormally forgetful" if the quiz were measuring that.
ReplyDeleteI, too, was given the abnormally observant rating. Yes, I have always been observant. This Canadian even had the correct answers about the American flag and money! Dianne Mahoney
ReplyDeleteI got abnormally observant, but I'm not sure my family would agree! Thanks that was fun.
ReplyDeleteDitto the husband who can't find anything in the pantry or fridge unless it's in the front row. What is he observant about? Numbers. What am I observant about? Anything to do with people and stories. When we are in a new place, I observe what people are doing and wearing and how they're interacting. He doesn't. But he always knows where we are and gets us where we're going! I'm very, very grateful for that.
ReplyDeleteI got abnormally observant too and felt a flash of pride, only to come and read the rest of the comments 🤣 I did have fun doing the quiz, though!
ReplyDelete