Wednesday, January 22, 2025

Hooligans Know Best...Sometimes.

 



JENN McKINLAY: The above picture is where I spent a good portion of Monday--when I was not chained to my desk cranking out the words to meet my impending deadline. Why? Well, the Hooligans arranged it because they are wonderful lads who think their mom is a workaholic (ME???) and they're worried about my stress levels. 

Full disclosure. I am not a massage person. The last time I had one was in 2003 when I booked a massage at the Waldorf Astoria in NYC because I was flying in from Phoenix on the red eye. I had a meeting with my Harlequin editor and I wanted to look refreshed instead of like a piece of petrified wood exhumed from the desert. 

How did it go? Great! I fell asleep to the sounds of taxi cab horns and other city noises only to wake up face down on the table watching the drool from my mouth splat on to my massage therapist's shoes. How does one recover from a moment like that? With a big tip!

Needless to say, I was a little nervous that history would repeat itself. I mean the table is heated. You're just asking for me to fall asleep like a very large cat. Thankfully, I did not. I did consider paying them to let me nap for another hour after the massage but work called...as it always does. 

This massage was definitely more successful than the last. I had jacked my knee during Saturday's 5K, and this morning I woke up all better! Yay! So, I'm rethinking making time for more self-care, partly because they gave me coupons for two free massages (I think the knot in my shoulder - a hazard of the writing life - which thwarted my therapist LeAnn was the impetus for the coupons. LeAnn will not be defeated)! and partly because I'm a woman of a certain age and frankly, I need all the help I can get. 

Since booking the massage, I've gotten much feedback from some folks who love them and others who are horrified by the thought of letting anyone touch them--and both responses make perfect sense to me.

Reds and Readers, where do you fall in the massage opinion poll? For or against? Anyone else drool on their therapist? Just me? 






91 comments:

  1. So glad the massage helped you to feel better, Jenn . . . but I'm a "no opinion" vote in the massage pool since I've never had one [no particular reason; the opportunity simply never presented itself] . . . .

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  2. Glad the massage worked out for you. My one and only massage and I had a panic attack.

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    1. Dry, I understand completely. The thought of having a massage gives me a panic attack. Elisabeth

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    2. Oops, spell check Dru. Sorry. Elisabeth

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    3. That would be my husband's response!

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  3. It sounds like a great treat, Jenn. Hooray for the Hooligans! As for me, I always thought a massage by a stranger would be much too invasive ... until I had one and realized that to the average masseuse, male or female, my body was just a slab of meat on the counter. I have had about four over my lifetime. They CAN be very enjoyable. The last one, given to me by an athletic young woman half my size and less than half my age, was so painful that I was doing the Lamaze breathing I learned almost 40 years ago. After working me all over with thumbs dug hard into my muscles to "break up the knots," she said happily, "These are cups that will draw all the impurities to the surface." I had tears in my eyes but somehow ingrained politeness precluded my saying, "Are you a madwoman?" As I paid her she counseled me to drink lots of water to wash away said impurities and told me I should book a course of weekly visits. I tottered away and have never been back. (Selden)

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    1. Oh gosh Selden, we all should take that lesson and say no to a painful massage!

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    2. Oh, cupping. I've heard of it but no -- not for me.

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  4. Raising my hand as a huge fan of massages, way back since college days. I took a couple of years break recently because of a skin sensitivity thing, but now I'm back to getting one monthly. The price has gone way up, but it's worth every dollar.

    I've found a new therapist and to our mutual astonishment, she and her husband are raising their sons in the house where I raised mine pre-divorce! They bought the big old farmhouse from my ex-husband seven years ago. I usually like to zone out during a massage, but during my first one with her a couple of weeks ago, she and I chatted up a storm about the house and our lives.

    Glad you have found a good body worker. Smart sons you raised. ;^)

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    1. Wow, what a coincidence. And very very weird. I think you should use that as a plot point in a book…

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    2. Off topic but here is another plot point. Did you know, that in Canada at least, your passport, if you die and do not have someone to return it to the government (all passports are not your, but the property of the government that lets you be in possession of it), well the passport remains in circulation, and therefore of value. Should you be a ne'er-do-well, and in possession of said passport, you could be that dead person, and go about life as such, until it expires at least. Endless nefarious possibilities.
      Brought to you, by the Passport office in idle chitchat, while getting ours renewed.

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  5. Jenn, glad your knee is feeling better! I think massage therapists are okay with you being so relaxed you fall asleep--that's their goal, to turn you from a board-stiff ball of pain into a limp noodle.

    I've had lots of massages, thanks to a bad car accident in my 20's leaving me with chronic back pain. But not until a neighbor who was a massage therapist (and short) started asking me to hem her pants, etc. for her. She paid me in massage sessions that I could not have otherwise afforded, and she taught me a lot about self-massage/self-care when having someone else to do it is not available. Lots of pressure point stuff, including how to reverse and/or stave off carpal tunnel.

    The most exotic massage I've ever had was in an open-air hut high on a hill in Samburu, on a table next to one of my daughters, for a "couples" massage. But the most decadent one I've ever seen was the woman getting a massage on a pontoon boat anchored in a private (or it was until our boat went by) cove in Galapagos. Just her and the masseuse, on a floating, covered platform with curtains billowing in the breeze. Impossibly romantic.

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    1. I had an open air massage in Costa Rica next to a river, hot rocks included, white curtains around us floating in the breeze. Absolute bliss!

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    2. Ooooh, that's a fancy massage. We should all go.

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  6. I used to love massages, so much!! Then I had bilateral mastectomies. Now I can't lie on my stomach! Think beached whale, it's uncomfortable to the extreme. Glad you had such a wonderful experience!

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    1. That's such a shame CTK, since you loved having them. I bet that a good massage place would be willing to accommodate your preference to sit during a massage.

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    2. CTK, I have an ileostomy so my stool flows into a bag on my abdomen. I thought I was doomed to never get another massage but learned to place a pillow strategically beforehand. I always make sure they understand we have to begin by working my back, because I cannot stay that way for long periods of time. I wish there was something similar that could aid you. -- Victoria

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    3. From Celia: oh I'm so sorry CTK. I have the opposite issue there being a plenitude of me and I found asking to be propped up with pillows can make all the difference. I do believe that massage is great and one needs to shop around to find the right fit. Good luck.

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    4. That sucks, CTK. Someone should have thought of a workaround for patients with that need.

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    5. It is amazing the many ways a good massage therapist can accommodate various needs. Must places have a chair they can use or items they use for pregnancy massage might also work. Can you tell I’m a huge fan. I have a sister who’s a therapist, yet ended up joining Massage Envy so I could definitely get one every month. They work wonders for me!

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    6. The hospital where I had my mastectomy has specially trained masseuses to work on patients with mastectomies. They are trained at the med school and carry specific licenses. This is in Portland, Oregon at Good Samaritan Hospital.

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  7. I've heard so many good things about massages and that really sounds like something I would enjoy and benefit from. Yet, I've never had one. Maybe I will look into finding a masseuse - what would be great would be one that came to my house.

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    1. I would love it at my house but my five cats and two dogs would likely want to participate.

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    2. Thanks for the chuckle, Jenn. Visualizing the pets participating (Heather S)

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  8. My husband and I went to a chiropractor who had an in-house masseuse. You’d go in for a massage, then go to the room next door to be adjusted. It worked really well because, as Karen said, you’re basically a limp noodle by the time you get to the adjustment. I had a massage on the cruise we went on last October and it was great….until it was over and she tried hawking the products they were promoting. — Pat S

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  9. I am meh about full body massages. I have had a few but they did not make me feel good after. But then again, I have no chronic pain or stresses that need to be worked on.

    A scalp massage may be fun to get when I am in Taiwan in April. Or a foot massage after a long day of walking around Taipei. Both are supposed to be amazing.

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    1. yes to the foot massage Grace, that sounds perfect. I'm a big fan of taking care of a well used body:)

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    2. I love foot massages Grace
      Danielle

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    3. Ooh, a foot massage would be so fabulous on vacation, especially after a long day of walking.

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    4. So jealous of your trip to Taipei - be sure to report in!

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  10. I love the idea of a massage but have yet to find anyone who can give me what I imagine in my mind to be the experience. I love your stories of falling asleep and drooling, Jenn, and I'm confident you are not the only client to have done so!

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    1. Amanda, ask around for a really good therapist; it makes all the difference, and there are too many so-so massage people around.

      I was really lucky on my last road trip in 2005, when I was speaking and booth-selling at sewing shows. On my way to the last show I fought the steering wheel for about 150 miles during a windy day on the Kansas plains, and by the time I unpacked my car and set up my booth I was in agony. Just before my first class one of the students asked me what was wrong, and I actually told her my back was in spasm (normally, I would keep it to myself). She asked if I wanted her to call her sister, who just happened to be a massage therapist in town to pick up a portable table. She called her right then, and we arranged for her to come to the hotel at dinnertime after the show was over for the day.

      She gave me the best massage of my life, two hours of unknotting muscles, and as soon as she left, BIG tip in hand, I fell asleep and did not wake up for ten solid hours, very unusual for me. My roommate had come in, showered, done all the things, and I had not even registered her presence. I was able to finish the show, and then drive the 600 miles home without more pain.

      Unfortunately, she lived in Minneapolis, but she can't be the only good massage therapist in the world.

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  11. I absolutely love massages. I've only had three or four real full-body ones and they were amazing. If anyone ever wants to know what to get me for a gift, a certificate for a massage would be heavenly. Just kidding. (No, I'm not.)

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  12. I love having a massage, and my current massage therapist is so skilled. One of my new year's resolutions is to get on a once-a-month massage schedule. As Edith says, it's worth every penny. Most of us carry a lot of stress in our bodies--I do, anyway--and regular massage helps dissolve that tension. I sleep better, I move better. It's all good. Think of it as a gift you give yourself (if you have no sweet Hooligans to give you a gift certificate).

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  13. NO, NO, NO. I do not want to be touched. Getting my hair washed and cut or having my teeth cleaned can be an ordeal. (Grateful for my understanding and gentle hair dresser and dental hygienist.) Even though many friends have sung the praises of massage, and encourage “just try it”, my blood pressure would soar way above the 200 mark! Elisabeth

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    1. That's my Hubs. He can't even abide the idea. LOL.

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  14. Jenn, how very thoughtful of your boys! I think that is one of the sweetest things I have heard about in a long time.

    I have had a few massages here and there, mostly wonderful. It seems indulgent, but I should be getting them because my neck is such a wreck and I always do feel better afterwards.

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    1. I do look at is as professional help my writing clench. Yes, my boys are incredibly thoughtful.

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  15. I only had one that I didn’t appreciate and never went for another. I’m sure it is a question of energy and that it could have been different with someone else but never tried again.

    However a good foot massage by my podiatrist right after a foot treatment is heavenly !
    Danielle

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    1. I get a great foot and leg massage with my pedicure.

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  16. I spent 2 hours with a massage therapist on Monday too. I wanted to do something for me during certain events on the east coast (clears throat). Aaron is so knowledgeable about the body, and he worked mostly on my left leg because the back of my knee has been bothering me since November. He thinks my very tight hamstrings and hips are possibly causing the problem and he really worked to help those muscles loosen up. No sleeping on the table for me. It does feel better, so I'm hopeful.

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    1. You should see a sports therapist for strengthening exercises. They csn pinpoint any weakness and help you fix the problem permanently.



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    2. SAME! My hammies are sooo tight. It really hit me while running. As anon says above - strengthening exercises are on my to do list.

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  17. I love a good massage! I hold a lot of my stress in my shoulders and over the years therapists have spoken about my shoulder knots. I always made sure to drink plenty of water afterwards because the massage released lots of toxins. That is one thing I truly miss about not having a home, etc. Also, being homeless is rather stress-inducing in itself. So, one of the first things on my to-do list when life turns itself around is to get a massage. Self-care is a priority! -- Victoria

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    1. From Celia: I agree Victoria and I'm sending you all the positive karma to help you. I hope things work out soon. Namaste

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    2. Hugs, Victoria. And I'm with Celia - sending you all of my good thoughts for things to get better.

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  18. How thoughtful of your sons!
    I have been having monthly massages for the past 30 years and find them very relaxing. Each time we moved it took a few massages to find a therapist I was comfortable with and booked my appointments with only that particular therapist.
    The most indulgent massage(about 15 years ago) was a couples massage my husband and I had in a beach cabana at a Mexican resort. It was so relaxing listening to waves break on the beach.

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  19. From Celia: WOW Jenn, you have raised two amazing sons and that is such great news for this week. I hope your knee improves and as part of the replace knee brigade I suggest some PT as well. I just realized that I work out to keep knee strong, I don't exercise. What is it about that E word that turns me off. Sits to stand and squats rule my life now.
    But along side workouts is massage, wonderful massage. Yes I indulge. I had poor massages, wonderful massages, massages with cupping which I love, massages in my home and on my deck overlooking the lake. I'm committed to massage which together with working out will carry me forward in a healthier way.
    I'm preaching and you all know me so I say throw aside all worries and get a massage. If you don't feel great after fool for a different therapist. There's one there that will suit you. Enjoy.

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    1. Very wise, Celia! And, yes, I agree. The E word is a bummer so I like to think of it as I'm not exercising to be thin or youthful - I'm getting stronger so I can kick ass :)

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  20. From Celia: Ugg, check your writing Celia - Find not fool. Sorry everyone

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  21. Well, I am just not a fan. I have to say. I love that you are invigorated and relaxed by them, and I see how that could happen! But personally, it just does not appeal to me in anyway. When I get a pedicure, I do like the foot massages, but I can take them or leave them. Well, I am just not a fan. I have to say. I love that you are invigorated and relaxed by them, and I see how that could happen! But personally, it just does not appeal to me in anyway. When I get a pedicure, I do like the foot massages, but I can take them or leave them. So funny – – there are definitely two camps on this one.
    so funny – – there are definitely two camps on this one. And yay for your 5K! You rock, Jenn!

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  22. I love massages and I don't get them often enough.

    Glad this one worked out for you, Jenn.

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  23. Do not like strangers touching me, although I did have a brief chair massage once.

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  24. I have had only 2 massages in my life because a) I hate to be touched, and cannot even envisage a pedicure without getting the heebie-jeebies, and b) they cost too much.
    However, when I had my first child (1979 when nurses were civilized and not run off their feet), it was a C-section early in the morning and Demerol was my best friend. I woke up in the middle of the night, sweating so badly that all of me and the bed was nothing but a puddle. The nurse came in, and cleaned me and the bed up, until all my world was nice and dry. She whispered that if she was not too busy (it was a full moon, and everyone was having babies!), she would be back and give me an alcohol bath. She was true to her word, and turned up, managed to get me rolled over and comfortable, and then gave the most extraordinary alcohol back rub and massage. It may be the most beautiful thing that ever happened to me!

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  25. I am also a fan of massage. I still usually think of them as a special treat rather than something I schedule routinely, but I wonder if I should rethink that. For those who want more frequent massage but find the price limiting, you might want to see if your area has a school of massage therapy. We have one nearby, and a physical therapist friend of mine endorsed it as turning out top quality massage professionals. I have had several massages there from the students and I found them as good as those I have had at spas, at a much lower cost.

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  26. Those Hooligans! So thoughtful and loving, Jenn! I'm glad that it helped--and that you're going to go back. Self-care is more necessary than ever these days. I've never had a full-body massage--probably won't--just not on my horizon.

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  27. I'm glad it went well this time around, Jenn! I received my first massage as a gift years ago, and I remember the massage therapist repeatedly admonishing me to "just relax!" I was trying my best to relax, but apparently I was doing it wrong. Since then, I've had more massages and end up almost falling asleep too, so I guess I've gotten over my issues with relaxation.

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    1. LOL - it really makes such a difference when you have a good therapist.

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  28. JENN: Very thoughtful of your kiddos! I am on the fence about massages. It depends on the person doing the massage. Sometimes I feel great after a massage. Sometimes I feel worse after a massage and my muscles hurt for about a week. That was before perimenopause. Yes, I slept through massages because it is so relaxing. That is why I like short period of time (30 minutes) instead of an hour. I cannot recall if I ever drooled. My best friend in high school loved massages because she was always working so hard - studying all hours plus working after school and on weekends.

    Self care is so important. My idea of self care is having a calming cup of tea, cozy blankets and fuzzy socks with a good book to read. In the last two weeks, I have been battling a sinus infection set upon by allergies.

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  29. I've had exactly one massage, from the waist up. It was nice but I find I can take it or leave it!

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    1. I thought the same but now I might be a convert.

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  30. You've got good boys, Jenn. I'm in your camp, in that I've had very few massage or spa experiences, I always think it will feel exceedingly weird, and I subsequently relax into a pile of semi-sentient goo.

    And I agree that after a certain age, self-care isn't an indulgence, it's a necessity - like getting your car's oil changed. You don't want to throw a rod or have your engine block seize up, do you?

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    1. Oh, Julia, thank you for this lovely light on a very bleak day for me! “like getting car’s oil changed” :-) Elisabeth

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    2. And my engine block will seize, fo sho. LOL.

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  31. What great kids! You are keeping them, right?

    I'm purring at the thought of a massage. I love them, but haven't had one in years. A new spa has opened in my neighborhood - gonna have to check it out. Hum, now that I think about it, time for a mani pedi, too :)

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  32. What a great gift! I get a full-body massage once a month, and it's very good for me. I can't imagine going to sleep during my massages because I always have sore areas (neck, upper back, shoulders, feet--and sometimes brand new places!) that need lots of work. That's painful, but it's a healing pain, and everything feels better afterwards.

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  33. I just had a spa day. Christmas present from
    My daughter. But I get regular massages. I need them for those knots in my neck and shoulders from sitting at a computer

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  34. I go to my chiro every month and he does a deep massage and there is no falling asleep with that when he’s digging into my pain areas. I require him to talk to me so I pay less attention to the pain. But afterwards I feel wonderful. I don’t drool over him but he sure is nice looking!

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  35. My daughter loves massages, but she doesn't have time to get one often, which I'm sure would be a problem for you, too, Jenn. Probably the people who benefit most from them don't have time for them. I've only had one, and it was nice. I'm not sure why I never went back. I think it might have had to do with how vigorous it was. I don't get pedicures because they want to rub your legs hard. Before I had vein problems in my legs, that was ok, but now it hurts, and I have to tell them to stop. What I am thinking about doing is Reiki, "in which the practitioner uses light touch to move energy throughout the client's or one's own body." I'm having some problems I think it might help.

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    1. Go for it, Kathy. I have friends who swear by Reiki.

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