JULIA SPENCER-FLEMING: It's moving day! No, not for me, thank God, but for my daughter and her family. My part is to be at their current house at 7:15 am (keep in mind it's an hour and twenty minute drive...) and watch my grandson "Paulie" while his mothers travel to Lewiston, Maine to sign the documents. Then, when they return, I'm taking their dogs - yes, again, but only for overnight this time. With their cat safely, if unhappily, locked in a room in the new place, this will clear the way for the local moving company to shift them 33 miles west.
My last move, in 1994, was also with a baby - six weeks instead of four months. Also? I had a seventeen-month old (that's the person who qualifies for a mortgage now. Sure didn't imagine that back then!)
Ross and I also hired a moving company, and, like Victoria and her wife, tried to pack up as much as possible to make the process quicker (we were only going 16 miles west!) However, Ross was a lawyer working something like 14 hours a day, and what little management/organizational ability I had was utterly scrambled by motherhood. It didn't help that we didn't actually start the process until a week before the moving truck arrived, unlike my daughter-in-law, who bought dozens of boxes and began packing as soon as their offer was accepted.
I recall the process only in glimpses, similar to the way people in a car only remember flashes of the terrible accident. There was the moment we were both up at 3am, trying to clean the kitchen while passing the fussy baby back and forth. At one point, I was nursing my son in the cab of the mover's truck, sobbing. For some reason, I have a clear memory of having no box in which to put the under-sink cleaning products, and deciding, "&#$% it, it'll just transfer with possession." Then nothing until Ross and I were standing in the main 40X20 foot room, saying to one another, "How are we ever going to fill all this space?" (Spoiler: we did.)
I've been in the same house since then, and friends and my children ask me if I consider getting someplace smaller, on one floor, say, and with MUCH less yard to maintain. And that would be nice! But honestly? I'm not sure I've recovered from the last move yet.
Dear readers, what are your moving stories?
We've moved three times and, other than remembering that we had boxes in storage, I have absolutely no memory of the process other than the fact that we moved ourselves each time . . . .
ReplyDeleteI'm happy for Victoria, her wife, and Paulie! I've heard the house market up there is crazy. Perhaps it is almost everywhere these days. I hope your sweet grandson has come 33 miles closer.
ReplyDeleteIn 42 years we've moved seven times and I've always done it almost entirely by myself. Found the rental, signed the papers, packed everything, unpacked everything (eventually including 75+ liquor boxes of books). My husband was always working. Once he was on business in China! For the cross-country moves to and from San Francisco, my brother, then a United Van Lines driver, drove our stuff and I flew with our 9-year-old son (and our golden retriever in a crate in the cargo hold) one way, and three years later, with our son, our baby daughter, and two cats in carriers under the seats the other way. For the trip from the Adirondacks to D.C., I packed and drove the 24-foot moving van. Had I ever driven a vehicle that size? No. Did I make out OK? Yes. However, after that experience I have always given U-Haul trucks a wide berth. For the last move, to our farm, I used my pick-up truck and I hired some teenaged muscle to help me wrestle furniture down stairs. I learned over all of these moves that I can shift almost anything by myself if I can slide it (using towels or blankets) and/or if I'm patient enough to proceed a couple of inches at a time. (Selden)
What I remember about moving is that it is easier to move from a smaller to a larger space. Downsizing bites. It is also easier to move when you are young and have young friends with good backs to help you. Moving in the winter in Minnesota was horrible, yet we did that twice. Moving across the country seemed daunting, but we managed to do that too. We used a packing cube company (The actual POD company was not in our area.) but we did all the packing and unpacking ourselves. My husband taped off the space for the cubes in the garage and meticulously stacked all the stuff for each cube out there ready for the arrival of the cubes. Then unstacked and restacked inside the cubes with the sturdy stuff on the bottom. It actually went very smoothly and the cubes were in storage right here in Ocala for the 2 months we rented while they finished building our house. They delivered them when we were ready and came back 72 hours later to pick up the empties.
ReplyDeleteI am still recovering from the Great Purge of 2024, as there are some things I wish I hadn’t gotten rid of, but overall it feels good not to have so much stuff. I love my new home —-yes all one level with zero entry! We don’t plan to move again. But, I know when our family of 5 moved in Feb. 2001 I said I wasn’t moving again until they carted me off to the nursing home. Never say never because you never know.
After getting a quote for long distance moving, it was much easier and less expensive to replace the items I needed, and with my tangibles my family drove up and brought them down.
ReplyDeleteI moved (fifty miles north) with a 3 year old and a nursing five-month old. That wasn't fun!
ReplyDeleteHugh and I moved to Amesbury (from Ipswich, not far) in 2012. I'm afraid there are a few boxes in the basement that still have never been opened. Ugh.
On Facebook this week Celia shared Victoria's column about moving to Lewiston but it was behind a paywall and I couldn't read it. Is there some other way I can access it?
First move (other than into and out of college dorms) was as a newly wedded to USCG ensign from CT to Kodiak, AK. Second move from Kodiak to Boston. Professional movers were part of the military deal all those years ago. Then on my own, from Boston to Seattle with only a few possessions in a VW convertible. Because of those early professional moves, I have hired professional movers to pack and carry ever since. For me, well worth the expense and far less stress on body and soul. Last moves from Seattle to Connecticut (1992) and then the downsize move from CT to FL in 2020. Good wishes for your daughter’s family move, Julia. May they reward you generously for the pet moving services. Elisabeth
ReplyDeleteI hardly remember our move into this house in 1984. We moved from a condo that was smaller but configured differently. Anyway, we moved in here with a lot of stuff, including things of my mother's that my father and step mother had saved for me, like her China and crystal, but very little furniture. Jonathan was 2.
ReplyDeleteThe moves I remember were Jonathan's moves in Boston. Oh, boy. There is a Boston tradition, because of all the colleges and universities, for all apartment leases to end on the same day, and the grand moving day is September 1. I will use a Hebrew word here, "baligan!"
We rented a UHaul (Irwin drove it and I followed in our car. He could barely steer it straight.) for that move and drove it from Hartford to Boston where we collected him from a tiny, moldy, 1 bedroom and moved him into a stately apartment building in Brookline. That gorgeous 2 bedroom had wooden floors, paneling in the dining room, soaring ceilings and enormous windows. It also had a firehouse right behind it with alarms going off day and night. His roommate and his father were helping him and us move everything up but the 4 men couldn't figure out how to get Jonathan's beautiful couch to fit in the elevator. Parked about 30 feet from us was a real moving truck with two burly professional movers. I offered them $60 to get that couch into the elevator and up to my bunny boy's apartment. Done!
Congratulations to Victoria and her family!
ReplyDeleteI moved into our first house with a 9 month old baby and nine month old poodle puppy. My husband was out of town. We had purchased the house in June, when it was daylight in the Cleveland area till 9pm. By the end of August, when I put the baby to bed, I discovered the only overhead light on the second floor was in the bathroom. My first purchase was a lamp for the nursery.
The one time I've moved, I was 2 1/2 and have no memory of it. That was to the house I'm in now which I've been living in for the past 50 plus years. So no real stories to share.
ReplyDeleteHowever, my father and I once helped move the son of a family friend out of the apartment he shared with his girlfriend. It was a relatively simple move...sort of. He and the girlfriend had broken up. He was moving out of a third floor apartment which meant a long trip each time we carried his stuff down the stairs. We then moved him into a 2nd floor apartment.
Again, it was relatively simple for a moving story. We got it all done in a day. But here's the kicker, a week or two later he called us and said he had gotten back together with the girlfriend and he was moving back in with her. Could we help move him? He was told, "you're on your own."
Hubs and I have moved way too many times. I think at this point, it's been 11 times. Soon to be 12. Always for a really good reason like jobs, family and finally, aging. Our last move was to Maine in the middle of Covid. We were trying to move near our older son in Hampton NH, but ended up nearer our younger son in Windham ME. And it worked for a while, but now we are gearing up to sell our house and move to, you guessed it, nearer older son, where our granddaughters are. And where we will hopefully find a much smaller house than the 3,000 sq ft we have now. I have started packing already, and giving away lots to my kids. Who now don't want anything more. So I know I will have about 1,000 sq ft of stuff I no longer want! And please notice I did not count all of the times I have helped my 2 sons move. I should be good at this by now but I still hate it!
ReplyDeleteAs a freshly divorced young woman I stubbornly wanted only to live on my own without any roommate(s) which definitely limited my choice of affordable apartments. I lived in one flat where the shower was located in the kitchen (!), the stovetop only had two burners, there was no oven and a small refrigerator was located under the sink. I cooked everything in an electric skillet. I negotiated with the owner of the house a $50.00 cut in the monthly rent if I agreed to keep the front yard shrubs free of litter and beer cans. (I lived on a main road and Saturday nights always guaranteed me a Sunday morning clean up full of surprises.) As small as both the kitchen and main room was the bedroom was huge and inviting with a window seat under a bay window and an entire wall of closet space. The layout was strange and I'm sure was not up to code. I moved four times before I remarried and my husband and I purchased his two-family childhood home in Belmont, MA. His mother lived on the first floor (nearly 70 years) and we occupied the second floor apartment. When it became clear that this old house needed a complete facelift from roof to basement, inside and out, new plumbing, heating and electrical updates and additional bathrooms and the only affordable solution was to sell the three of us faced both the physical and especially emotional challenge of saying goodbye to lots of memories. Plus two moves in the same year. My mother-in-law Ann who had lived with us for nearly 40 years (and who had lived on the first floor as a young bride for 30 plus years prior) had nearly 3/4 of a century's worth of "stuff" that had accumulated as a result of raising six children in that house. Every report card, greeting card, trophy and personal item left behind by each sibling was a gargantuan project to face resulting in a dumpster in the driveway for over a month and two yard sales. To this day I can't imagine how difficult it was for Ann to say goodbye to 70 years of living in that home and at the age of 91 bravely moving to another town to live with her daughter who thankfully was thrilled to have her mother join her and her husband. She moved in the snowy month of January and we moved on Thanksgiving Day that same year. Nearly 12 years later (as well as being 12 years older) I'm not sure how we survived crawling around in a hot attic in July and sifting through everyone's personal things long left behind in the basement. It's as if we moved 8 people from that home ~ My husband and I, his mom and his five siblings. However, we were blessed to have a dear friend who owned a moving company assist us in both moves professionally packing everything in clearly marked boxes and clothing "wardrobes". Plus another close friend who bought our home and who worked with our timeline of when our condo would be ready (window treatments completed, appliances installed, etc.) and who also gave our old house its badly-needed facelift. From attic to basement ~ completely renovated, 3 new bathrooms added, and brand new electrical, plumbing and HVAC installed. It went from a two-bathroom duplex to a five-bathroom duplex and two beautiful apartments. My husband and I were delighted as we felt the house, although long in the tooth, was jam-packed with love and decades of family history and greatly deserved another life cycle of additional generations and more memories. We still miss living so close to Boston, our Sunday morning walks or bike rides along the Charles River and many hours we spent in the City but over a decade later are still enjoying the thrill of Cape Cod discoveries and being a part of American history here in Plymouth.
ReplyDeleteOh Julia, good luck with everything today! Hoping Lewiston is easier for you to get to than where Victoria and her wife are now! We moved a fair amount when I was young. And then to college and back -worse I’m sure for my Mom than for me. I lived in 4 different apartments before I was married and we moved, from separate apartments to our first (and only) apartment just before we married. Our last move was in 1989 to our current house. I hope to stay here until we need one level living. 🤞🏼that’s at least 12 years away. I have started trying to reduce, recycle, get rid of but you all know how that goes.
ReplyDelete2003 – moved from Ontario to the far eastern part of Nova Scotia. By ourselves. 2 adults, 2 children – one 23 supposed to be helping, one 13 – it was his birthday – oh the moaning. 23-year-old did not help other than to annoy the 13-year-old from another vehicle – no cell phones just walkie-talkies – squawk, squawk!! One sister/-in-law – butt-insky who thought herself God. Enough said. 17 cats, 2 old English sheep dogs, a turtle, a rabbit, and should have been about 40 finches but they succumbed the night before – stress from the proximity of the cats – another story but very sad. Livestock – 2 geese, 5 ducks including Stanley who thought he was a stud-duck, quite a few chickens, and a frozen turkey on the roof- perfectly good food, no need to waste it.
ReplyDeleteTook 3 days. First day money did not go through from sale of house – had to wait. Day 2 – snow storm and blizzard going through Quebec. Stopped by cops 20 miles down the road – they shook their heads and said – move on… (a bit overloaded in truck 2 that was swaying all over the lane.) Really blizzarding by Riviere de Loup. Stopped at a DancerNues motel (not the motel that your mother would recommend). Took 2 rooms. Moved animals in – rabbit in bathtub, turtle in the sink – we didn’t ask if animals were allowed – best not to. Livestock stayed out in the snow – they had feathers, turkey on the roof said nothing.
Left - quietly – in the morning in the blizzard. At least it was light out. At end of New Brunswick, we stopped for a weigh station for the large moving van – pulling a trailer with an antique ATV, a motor cycle, and enough (old) tires to start a used tire shop and some perfectly good heavy duty glass suitable for windows.. Buddy says you are overweight – maybe you can move the snow off the roof – here is a broom. Up on the roof Jack goes – he is half dead from worry about all of this move. Sweeps. Needle on scale does not move. Buddy looks at him and says where are you from and where are you going. Ontario to Cape Breton. Now imagine if you will, a lumber-jack who has been lost in the woods for months, clothes ripped and piled on and generally in disrepair, and needing a beard trim and a haircut under the toque. Right. Buddy says ”most people who look like you are going the other way… Don’t stop again.” We thanked him, got in the vehicles and kept driving until after midnight. Stars came out at the top of Kelly’s Mountain (Cape Breton), and it was a beautiful night.
My parents had left us a cooked chicken and a birthday cake for when we arrived. We snuffed it!
23 years.now. Don’t ever have to move again.
Enjoy your day with Paulie.
OMG Margo, that sounds like a Dave story from Vinyl Cafe.😆
DeleteDave should be so lucky!
DeleteMargo - that is a blockbuster movie waiting to be produced!
DeleteI can't even imagine the fortitude it took to get through such a move with all the animals.
I am way too experienced at moving. Growing up, I believe my family moved seven times. Then from the time I moved out of a college dorm to the time hubby and I moved into our current home added another ten moves, if I'm remembering correctly. And that doesn't count the moves I did for my son and sister.
ReplyDeleteThe year 2024 was my nightmare year for moves. In April, in preparation for his departure for Japan, we moved my son out of his apartment. He sold off most of his larger possessions, so we were able to move him with just a small truck, but it was still a lot of work. In September we moved into our retirement condo. We used professional movers but it was still quite an ordeal, beginning with the movers showing up hours late. Then in November, we moved my sister from one independent living apartment to another because we no longer felt her neighborhood was safe. We used a hybrid U-Haul service where we rented the truck but hired guys to do the lifting -- a service I would recommend for anyone needing to keep the cost down for an apartment-sized move. Honestly, though all the moving days were stressful, the thing that stands out in my mind from that year of moves is just cleaning. Perpetually cleaning. Oy, the cleaning.
We've only moved twice - from our first apartment to the first house, then from there down to Ligonier. I don't remember any emotionally scarring stories from the first move. For this one, it was, "There is no way we can take all these books" and a lot of "Where is X? Oh at the other house." At least we still own the other house (The Boy is living there while in school) so it's a matter of going there to retrieve said item.
ReplyDeleteBut I never want to move again.
Love these stories! Although I have moved several times I've never used professional movers. The closet to that was the two times we rented a U-haul truck and di it ourselves, with help from friends and relatives. I probably should sell this house and move someplace smaller but I simply cannot face the effort it would take.
ReplyDeleteLike Julia, I grew up in a military family (Navy) and between birth and age 10 we moved 6 times. I actually loved moving to new places - new people, new experience. I wish we could have moved in my high school years overseas but dad had retired by then and my parents were done traveling.
ReplyDeleteI married a man who hates moving (although he is retired Navy reserve) and I wish we could have moved to different places from time to time. We've lived in our current location since (hub 1973) and me (1977) - but we did a complete remodel (as in new construction) finished in 1996.