The Expats: Imagining Another Life @LucyBurdette

 LUCY BURDETTE: You've heard that John and I were in France for 10 days at the end of May. In Paris, we had the amazing opportunity to meet American, English, and Australian people who have moved from their home countries to France. This fascinates me! After I tell you about some of them, I would love to hear whether you would have either the urge or the nerve to move somewhere unfamiliar.

First, we had a glass of wine with a group of people who follow Heather Stimmler’s Secrets of Paris blog and newsletter. Heather is an American who moved to Paris in the 1990s. She started giving tours and now has a paying blog with exactly as the name says, secrets of Paris: places to go, how to get into a popular museum, meetups for those interested in socializing. At our table were two couples who have sold everything in the US and now rent apartments in Paris. We were interested to hear about their experience with medical care (good!), Learning the language (so hard!), making French friends (not easy.) One of the men is a musician who spends a lot of time playing with others and also listening to music so he’s met people that way. Another of the women knits and has joined knitting groups. John interviewed one of the men from our cocktail group and I know you will enjoy reading that article. 

We also took a tour with an English man who moved to Paris with his wife in the 90s. He’s built a business giving tours and doing podcasts through his website, the Earful Tower. His introduction into the world of Parisian people came through playing basketball. 

The real Emily in Paris, whom you’ve heard me speak of, came to Paris from London (she is Australian by birth) and then met and married a Parisian man. They now live in Paris with their two small children and his daughter from a previous marriage. She says her in to Parisian life is through her kids and also other expats in the city. She feels she will never be accepted totally as a French person. 

The Real Emily in Paris

Jane Bertch, who we've featured twice on the blog here, is also an American who first moved to London, and then to Paris in the banking world. She got the idea to found la cuisine Paris, and has written a memoir about the transition called the French Ingredient. She seems so comfortable in her new life! You can also read the cookbooks and newsletters of Dorie Greenspan and David Lebovitz, Americans who have mostly transplanted themselves to Paris and feel very much at home, while at the same time are aware of not being French.

Lucy with Dorie and Jane

My takeaways from meeting these folks? A big move like this is really hard! It’s important to love the city that you are joining and be patient with yourself. Parisians are not famous for easily accepting people. The truth is, much as I love that city, and would love to know it more thoroughly, I have a deep tap root that connects me to the US. Along with friends and relatives that I would miss dearly. Plus a husband who wouldn’t go. So alas, I can’t see myself joining the ex-pats. I will have to do this through my fiction.

What about you, Reds? Can you see yourself moving to another country? If you’re tempted, where would it be and what draws you there?

The Magic of Putting Pen to Paper: How Writing Opened My World @JaneBertch

LUCY BURDETTE: Today I’m so pleased to welcome my friend Jane Bertch back to the blog. You may remember that she moved to Paris from Chicago via London and founded the very popular La Cuisine Paris. Then she wrote a wonderful memoir about the project, The French Ingredient, and now she has a new adventure beginning— a podcast, a newsletter, and a series of retreats in Paris focused on creativity. 

JANE BERTCH: There’s something magical about putting pen to paper. And what I’ve found, through my writing journey, is that the simple act of writing can open you to versions of yourself you never even knew existed. 

When I first began writing, it wasn’t with grand ambition—it was during a difficult time when I needed a distraction. I needed to reconnect and speak with myself. To listen to what I needed to say, I started writing, not for anyone else, but for myself. To explore my thoughts. To give shape to feelings that were difficult to name. To test my voice. It was clumsy and frustrating, but at the same time exhilarating. 

That quiet practice of self-connection blossomed into something bigger. I wrote a book. It felt like the boldest thing I’d ever done—exposing my thoughts, my voice, and my vulnerability to the world. But something magical happened: people responded. They didn’t just read—they reached out. They shared their stories. I soon realized that the beauty of human connection is that when I dared to share my story, I quickly recognized it is a shared story—it soon became ‘our’ story. 

Writing gave me more than clarity—it gave me connection and community.

Through the book, I found my community: women, creators, and thinkers who needed to be reminded that at any age, no matter the circumstances, anything is possible. Sharing my voice, as imperfect as it may be, allowed others to share theirs. That connection became so meaningful that I wanted to keep it going. So, I launched a personal newsletter—separate from my business—to continue testing and refining my voice and, most importantly, to nurture and build connections. I found freedom in writing more personally and now relish a space where my vulnerability and curiosity can exist openly, basking in the light of day rather than remaining in the recesses of my mind.

But it didn’t stop there. Writing not only helped me find others—it made me realize I wanted to build a community with them. To create a deeper space for authenticity, which then led me to dream of an entirely new business. One that would be a new chapter of my life – or as I like to say, another petal on my flower.  The idea of GenerateHER retreats was born— a dream to focus on cultivating real community. A place where women can come together and remind themselves of the wonderfully creative and courageous beings they are.

All of this—just from daring to put pen to paper.

So, writing is more than a tool – it’s a key to a new door waiting to be opened. It’s how we meet ourselves, and often, how we meet each other.

So the next time you pick up that pen, just imagine what new, beautiful community you might meet along the way. You might just uncover someone very special amongst them….a new version of you!

You can learn more about Jane here.

About La Cuisine Paris:  

La Cuisine Paris is a French culinary school in the heart of Paris. With a team of classically trained French chefs, we offer cooking classes and food tours in English. We welcome visitors from all over the world with the focus of sharing food and culture.

 

Jane Bertch's French Ingredient

 

LUCY BURDETTE: I had been receiving the newsletter for La Cuisine Paris for quite a while when I noticed that its founder, Jane Bertch, was releasing a new memoir, THE FRENCH INGREDIENT. Of course I bought it, read it, loved it, and then wrote to Jane in Paris to see if she’d visit our blog. She said of course, and here she is today. I love her story and cannot wait to visit the cooking school.

Welcome Jane! One of the things I so admire about your story and this book is your ability to leave a close family and home and start over in a very strange place. Can you tell us a bit about this move and what made it possible?

JANE BERTCH: Lucy, I would like to credit my 20-something-year-old self with the foresight on that initial move to Europe almost twenty-five years ago…but the reality is I didn't have a plan other than seizing what seemed to be an exciting opportunity. I will, however, say that my mother always instilled in me the concept of ‘roots and wings.’ With strong roots that keep you grounded and connected, you can have strong wings that allow you to fly. No matter how far I have been, I always felt connected to home and family. 

While I cannot credit my younger self with a grand plan in those early days, I will credit her with being ready to take risks and to do so with childlike curiosity rather than fear. Many years later, I am indeed more measured in my decisions, and thankfully, my younger self still surfaces from time to time to give me a little kick when I need it!

LUCY: I’ve come away from reading your book (twice) with some very clear ideas about what makes Paris and Parisians so different. You’ve said things such as “in France, relationships are everything. Without them you will get nowhere.“ And “Paris is the kind of place that thrives on obstacles, and so do its people. The French also love conformity.” Could you tell us about a couple of the lessons you’ve learned and what it took to learn them?

JANE BERTCH: I learn every single day! Living and working in a very complex country is wonderfully beautiful and frustrating all at the same time. There are so many cultural codes I still have yet to discover, and most times, I discover them either through keen observation or, frankly, an embarrassing gaff! If I were to distill twenty years of experience into two key lessons, they would be the importance of presentation and time.

I have found France to be a country built on the art of presentation. You can see this reflected everywhere, from the care a vendor will take to arrange their products at the market, to the beautifully presented pastry in the shop window, to how people take care with greeting one another, to how a person will carry themselves with confidence when they enter a room.

And time. Time is sacred in France. Time to enjoy an undisturbed meal, time to enjoy a cafe with a friend, and time to curate a relationship. Things just cannot be rushed in France, and I have had to learn the hard way, especially when dealing with relationships. Relationships are gained, not given - and only through time and trust.

LUCY: Your decision to start a cooking school in Paris is so interesting to me because up until that point in the book, you barely mentioned food or cooking. I would love to hear more about how a cooking school became the dream of your lifetime (so far!)

JANE: I love to share this part of my story; it’s one of the reasons I decided to write The French Ingredient. Until December 31st, 2008, I had never considered opening a cooking school. I surprised everyone, including myself, when the idea slipped from my lips at a festive NYE celebration with friends. I didn't know how important being in a kitchen and making a meal with others would be for me. I grew up in my grandmother's kitchen, where everything in our family happened around her table. Later in life, in some way, I now see that I recreated this in the form of La Cuisine Paris. Food is just but a vehicle - a vehicle to express, to share culture, to share stories, to commune, to connect. 

So this wonderful idea chose me, I didn't choose it - and my answer to that is sometimes you end up where you are meant to be. I believe (thanks to Elizabeth Gilbert’s book Big Magic) that ideas are life forms. They come to us every day, and it is up to us to act on them. Some whisper to us, some downright scream! But we only ever hear them in their fullest when we can get quiet within ourselves. 

So, my dream actually started as a vision/idea, and the ‘dream’ was to realize the best possible version of that idea.

I love to share this with others because I have seen so many people who felt unfulfilled and frustrated with finding their ‘dream’…sometimes that spark inside of us is yet to happen, but it can come at any point and any age. And let me be living proof that anyone can do anything!

I hope to have a few more sparks to bring to life.

LUCY: And finally, what kind of a cook are you and what are your favorite things to eat in Paris?

JANE: I will be the first to admit that on a daily basis, I am an ‘efficient’ cook - you can read into that, meaning easy, simple meals to fill a purpose. I don't really take pleasure in cooking unless it is to share with others! I do love to eat out, and while I love most types of food, I particularly enjoy a nice classic French meal. I’m a creature of habit, and you will find me ordering the same type of dishes over and over. I can never pass on an oeuf mayo, and if there is a steak au poivre with frites (fries) on the menu, I am most likely to order it…. with a nice glass of red wine, of course!

LUCY AGAIN: Jane will be stopping on to answer comments and questions (from Paris!), so please say hello!

You can order The French Ingredient here.

About La Cuisine Paris:  

La Cuisine Paris is a French culinary school in the heart of Paris. With a team of classically trained French chefs, we offer cooking classes and food tours in English. We welcome visitors from all over the world with the focus of sharing food and culture.