Honoring Our First Ladies

DEBORAH CROMBIE: On President's Day, we thought the women behind the men deserved recognition, too. We have, after all, had some remarkable First Ladies, and I suspect our American story would have been quite different without their influence. It's hard to pick favorites but I will give you two (because I'm going first, and because I couldn't choose between them.)

First, Lady Bird Johnson. Born Claudia Alta Taylor in Karnack, Texas, in 1912. A family nurse called her "pretty as a lady bird" and the nickname stuck. She is best known in Texas for the Lady Bird Johnson Wildflower Center  and for her championing of the use of native plants in landscaping, but she was also a fierce advocate for women's rights, lending her support to the War on Poverty and the Equal Rights Amendment.

My second First Lady is another Texan, Barbara Bush, and that choice is very personal--I've met her more than once and admire her enormously. She's witty and warm and charming, she's a huge reader, and she's spent her life doing everything she can to promote literacy.

Reds, do you have a First Lady you admire? Tell us who and why!

INGRID THOFT: My choice would be Hillary Clinton, but Michelle Obama is also at the top of my list.  Hillary was a First Lady who wasn’t afraid to take on health care as her cause, a cause that proved divisive.  However, she didn’t let that deter her from enacting real progress in the form of the Children’s Health Insurance Program (better known as CHIP these days.)  I recently heard Hillary speak, and she pointed to this program as an example of not letting perfection be the enemy of good.  She noted that when universal healthcare was shot down that might have been the end of the push for affordable health insurance for Americans.  However, she decided to work with both Democrats and Republicans to put CHIP into place, and millions of children received insurance as a result.  I admire Hillary for her wisdom, her courage, her strength and her restraint.  When her character has been disparaged again and again, she’s taken the high road (just as Michelle suggested!)

RHYS BOWEN: When I was young I was so impressed with Jackie Kennedy. 

She always looked so perfectly turned out. I admired Barbara Bush for not being afraid to speak her mind and defend her husband. But if I had to pick just one it would be Michelle Obama. What a classy lady! She had the most awful insults hurled at her, words that no person should hear about themselves, and she never once flinched or gave any indication that those words mattered. And in four years she never put a foot wrong. No scandals. Just a clearly loving wife and mother. And her powerful speeches make me wish that she'd decide to run for the office herself!

HALLIE EPHRON: I know so little about former First Ladies. Pat Nixon and her cloth coat. Nancy Reagan and her astrologist. Lady Bird and her billboards. Seemed like being First Lady turned them cardboard cutouts whose main function was to stand by the president and make him look like a human being. I thought Hillary was heroic for trying to remake healthcare. 

In my opinion, no one's done it with as much grace as Michelle Obama. I was smitten by her relationships with Barack and her daughters. And let's not forget the clothes! And easy, given that she got to stand beside a man who made it easy to stand by.

HANK PHILIPPI RYAN:  Can you even imagine? Every single thing you do, or say, or wear. Every single sidelong glance, or closed eyes or lifted eyebrow. Your shoes, your child-rearing, your arms,  the actions of your husband, the books you read and the color of your lipstick, foibles and hobbies and passions. ALL under the microscope every single moment. Are you smart enough, pretty enough, wise enough, patient enough, impatient enough, caring enough, too caring, deferential enough, not deferential enough...Ahhh. I admire them all, absolutely for bearing up under that.

DEBS: Hank, I absolutely agree. I can't imagine how hard it would to subject yourself to that sort of scrutiny and criticism--not to mention the First Ladies who put their own careers on hold!


JENN McKINLAY: Hank, I could never. I swear like a sailor, play pranks with my sons that would be fodder for all the judgy types, and am about as far from a fashionista as a woman can be. Ingrid and Rhys, count me in on the Michelle Obama fan club. I simply adore her. But there is one first lady, who lived before my time, whose words echo in my head with great regularity. Eleanor Roosevelt. She said, "You must do the thing you think you cannot do." I turn to this quote in times of self doubt and it has always guided me through it. 

LUCY BURDETTE: This was my comment too, Hank, only you said it so much more eloquently. Serving as First Lady is an impossible job. You didn't choose the job. You aren't being paid for it. Your freedom to live a normal life is gone. And if you don't adore your husband or agree with his positions, you sure better be a good actress!

That said, I loved Michelle's grace and dignity and sense of humor, and admire many other of these women, as well. It's been interesting to go on several tours of the Little White House here in Key West as research for DEATH ON THE MENU. Harry Truman spent a lot of time here--and did important work here too, often with other government figures and the press in attendance. But Bess Truman did not love it, so she often didn't come. And that didn't seem to bother anyone! Can you imagine that happening these days?

DEBS: Lucy, I was so sorry I didn't get to see the Truman White House when I visited Key West. I can't wait to read DEATH ON THE MENU so I'll be up to snuff the next time!

JULIA SPENCER-FLEMING: I'm going to go back in time a bit - a hundred years, to be exact. I've always been fascinated by Edith Bolling Galt Wilson, the second wife of Woodrow Wilson. Edith was the widow of a socially prominent but somewhat inept businessman when she was introduced to the also-widowed Wilson. She was forty-three and he was fifty-nine and they fell deeply in love, despite a swirl of rumors that they must have been having an affair before Ellen Wilson's death (some even speculated that the two had done away with the first Mrs. Wilson - clearly the Alex Jones conspiracy-monger types aren't a new phenomenon.)

Edith was prepared for the sort of social hostessing First Ladies were called upon to perform; what she got instead was WWI. She flung herself into supporting the effort (and setting an example) with "gasless Sundays, meatless Mondays, and wheatless Wednesdays" at the White House. In a move that may remind you of Michelle Obama, she set a flock of sheep to graze on the White House grounds, to free up the manpower mowing took, and then had the sheared fleeces auctioned off to benefit the Red Cross.

But she's best known for what she tried to most keep under wraps - stepping in for her husband after he suffered a devastating stroke in 1919. From then until the end of his term in 1921, she read every legislative paper and piece of correspondence sent to the president, dealt with the ones she didn't think her husband needed to bother with, and condensed the rest into easy-to-digest summaries to suit Wilson's weakened condition. She always described herself as a mere steward for her husband's work, but members of the Executive branch tacitly acknowledged she was, in reality, running the show.

She was politically active in the Democratic Party for the rest of her life. Born in the presidency of Ulysses S. Grant, she was an honored guest at JFK's inauguration, and died at the ripe old age of 89 in 1961. Hurrah for Edith Wilson!

DEBS: Julia, I love this story about Edith Wilson! I had no idea! I was  hoping we'd learn some things we didn't know about First Ladies, and I had great fun hunting up the photos.

READERS, do you have any great stories about First Ladies to share?

Modern Day Heroes

From Martin Luther King Jr., from the March on Washington for Jobs and Freedom, 1963:

I say to you today, my friends, so even though we face the difficulties of today and tomorrow, I still have a dream. It is a dream deeply rooted in the American dream.
I have a dream that one day this nation will rise up and live out the true meaning of its creed: 'We hold these truths to be self-evident: that all men are created equal.'
I have a dream that one day on the red hills of Georgia the sons of former slaves and the sons of former slave owners will be able to sit down together at the table of brotherhood.
I have a dream that one day even the state of Mississippi, a state sweltering with the heat of injustice, sweltering with the heat of oppression, will be transformed into an oasis of freedom and justice.
I have a dream that my four little children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin but by the content of their character.
I have a dream today.
I have a dream that one day, down in Alabama, with its vicious racists, with its governor having his lips dripping with the words of interposition and nullification; one day right there in Alabama, little black boys and black girls will be able to join hands with little white boys and white girls as sisters and brothers.
I have a dream today.

photo by Mike Licht

LUCY BURDETTE: King was only 39 years old when he was assassinated, and yet he left such a large footprint. He identified civil rights as his life’s work back when he was a teenager. And he never let up on that. And he was willing to sacrifice his own life to stand up and speak his mind.

Ricci Coughlan/DFID

His “holiday” has me wondering, are we making heroes the way we used to? I mean grand-scale heroes who are willing to sacrifice their lives either literally or figuratively to protect something vitally important for the rest of us. I would put forward Michelle Obama as one of mine. Over the past eight years, she has been consistently classy and strong-minded supporting issues she believed to be important, and managed to raise two amazing daughters while under the microscope. Whom do you admire, and for what?

RHYS BOWEN: I'd agree about Michelle. One classy lady who has raised two daughters with the idea of service and dedication. Another of my heroes was Maya Angelou. When I tried to go through our current crop of politicians I'm afraid I couldn't come up with a single "Ask what you can do for your country, not what your country can do for you."  It's been more "Ask how I can accept kick backs from lobbyists while denying the other party the chance to do anything." But there are plenty of small heroes: those who teach in inner city schools and buy all their own supplies. Nurses who sit by the bedside of a dying child. Those who minister to the homeless and go to war-torn countries to provide help to refugees.

I think we are all called upon to be heroes in our own small way. It involves not turning a blind eye to injustice, speaking up even though it may make us feel foolish. Never allowing bullying or intimidation. Choosing our charities that mean something special to us and then giving generously. Volunteering. Showing compassion. Vowing to do one small act of kindness every day and to leave the world a little better than we found it. A great challenge, but worth undertaking!

HALLIE EPHRON: I agree on Michelle Obama. And in that vein, another heroic first lady was Eleanor Roosevelt. She found her own niche. lobbied for the needy and oppressed, and had Franklin's ear. And I'll second teachers and nurses and politicians who are motivated by a desire to serve for the public good. And the suffragists and suffragettes and abolitionists. Reminding us that it's easy to sign a petition but actions speak louder.   

JULIA SPENCER-FLEMING: Chiming in on Michelle Obama. I'm looking forward to seeing what she does as a private citizen (and she has so many years ahead of her! She's younger than many of us.) Politicians, leaders... I find Sen Tammy Duckworth incredibly inspiring. Someone who has given as much as she has to our country and who is willing to give more. Elizabeth Warren, the populist firebrand. Maine's own Senator Susan Collins, one of the last of the moderate Republicans in DC, a politician who is willing to listen to and work with people across the aisle.

I agree with Rhys: the days to come will require us all to be heroes, if even in one small gesture or one kind word.

INGRID THOFT: Another Michelle Obama fan here.  I looked up "hero" in the dictionary, because it seems to be a word we toss around a lot more than we used to.  Dictionary.com defines it as "a person noted for courageous acts or nobility of character," and Michelle seems to fit the bill with nobility of character.  I think there are groups who have acted heroically by providing shelter and relief to those displaced by war.  I think Anita Hill was a hero for taking a stand (literally) in the face of horrendous abuse and character assassination.  I think that kids who stand up for other kids on the playground are acting heroically, and I do think people who do jobs where they run towards danger rather than from it are heroes.  

JENN MCKINLAY: I adore Michelle, too. Frankly, I admire anyone who can keep their composure when under constant scrutiny and frequent vicious attack. I am not that person - my command of profanity prohibits me from being polite when a good chewing out is deserved. I do try, but I usually fail. I consider myself a work in progress, learning from people like Michelle Obama, Maya Angelou, Emma Thompson, Malala Yousifazi, and my mom, to name just a few. In raising boys, I feel lucky that they have several strong male role models (like their dad) to learn from but when they were younger, I also employed the Rule of DC/Marvel. If they exhibited behavior that was unacceptable, I'd say, "You love (insert Spiderman, Ironman, Batman, etc.), do you think he would behave like that? If you want to be a hero, you have to act like one." For the most part, it worked like a charm. It will be interesting to see who they choose to emulate as they grow older. Right now, it's all about music, specifically rock and roll -- Keith Richards as a role model, go figure!

DEBORAH CROMBIE: I'm all for Keith Richards as a role model, Jenn!! And I admire Michelle tremendously. I think it will be very interesting to see what she does when the First Lady shackles come off. 

I know it seems hard at the moment to remember that there are lots of people who act with decency, kindness, and compassion, and speak up--and act--on their principles. There is Jimmy Carter, and Pope Francis. I have great admiration for Bill and Melinda Gates, who donate huge amounts of money AND effort to make the world a better place. And Bill Gates's buddy, Warren Buffet. There's John Lewis, the congressional representative who's much in the news the last few days, but his record as an activist goes back many years. Barbara Bush is a long-held hero of mine for her efforts towards improving literacy. 

And here's something inspiring; the Bush girls (young women, I should say,) Barbara and Jenna, writing to Sasha and Malia on leaving the White House. They have grown up to be women to admire.

And here's one more thing to give a little fist-bump to human compassion and decency: ‘James Bond of Philanthropy’ Gives Away the Last of His Fortune.

HANK PHILLIPPI RYAN: Jenn, your rule of DC/Marvel is awesome. Thank you!  I am trying that out this very day.
As for the incomparable Michelle. Yes. I am endlessly grateful. And I am so attached to her. (And I have talked with Anita Hill, and could barely form a coherent word.)
 But heroes and role models? 
My step-son and his wife and our two grandsons are visiting us this weekend. It is enthralling and amazing to watch Josh and Eli learn things and acclimate to their world--and to see their parents juggle and help and encourage. Paul works every day at a stimulating and important job and Krista is getting her masters in early childhood education and STILL they focus on their kids. It is so difficult. So--I am in AWE of any hard-working and devoted  parents. Any parent who is taking the responsibility to introduce a new person into the world--to teach them about love and music and literature and analytical thinking and kindness and  pizza. I applaud you all.  


Reds, how about you? Any thoughts about modern day heroes?

Nancy Martin Confesses

Jan Brogan:   As most of you already know, Nancy Martin is the highly successful and prolific author of nearly fifty popular fiction novels, including the Blackbird Sisters mystery series and the Roxy Abruzzo mysteries.   Publisher's Weekly called her  latest release, No Way to Kill a Lady,"a fizzy, entertaining adventure."  Margaret Maron says:  "Nancy Martin knows the inner workings of blue-blooded Philadelphia and she lets us in on the fun with style and panache.”


And if you are the lucky commenter today, chosen at random, Nancy will send you a free copy of her new book!  The one lucky winner will be announced tomorrow!

NANCY MARTIN: At the risk of offending the Reds, I’d like to talk about . . . pink

Specifically the idea of posting 50 Shades of Pink on my Facebook page every day for the 50 days leading up to the release of the new Blackbird Sisters Mystery, NO WAY TO KILL A LADY.  I am always scrambling for something to post on Facebook, but one day I realized I had exactly 50 days, and of course 50 Shades hit me right away.  I mean, who hasn’t heard of the 50 Shades of Gray?

C’mon, now.  You can ‘fess up.  Have you read it? Any of it?  Even a few pages? Tell Aunt Nancy everything.
Shy?  I’ll get back to you in a minute.

Let me confess:  
The biggest mistake I made when I created the Blackbird sisters was the couture. (You thought I was going to confess something else?)  I knew Nora Blackbird was broke when she took her new job as a society columnist for a Philadelphia rag, and I also knew she’d need great clothes to wear to the parties she attends every night. After considerable stewing, I hit upon the idea of Nora using her late grandmother’s collection of fabulous designer clothes.


Only thing was, I knew ZILCH about designer clothes.  Honestly, the people who make fun of middle-aged ladies who wear yoga pants all the time?  That’s me they’re laughing at. So the research to create a vintage wardrobe for Nora Blackbird has been daunting from the get-go.  I finally hit upon the idea of only using dresses that actually existed, which has made my task slightly easier.  I have books about Chanel, and I adore Diana Vreeland’s autobiography, DV. My subscription of Vogue is now tax deductible, and I scour the Metropolitan Museum’s fashion department often. 


Over the last ten years (since the release of HOW TO MURDER A MILLIONAIRE, the first book in the series) I’ve become surprisingly good at identifying the work of top designers.  I don’t wear it, mind you, but I can identify it.


My readers really enjoy Nora Blackbird’s clothes—more than I expected. I get fan mail from around the world about the duds. So during the final 50 days before the release of the new book, I have posted 50 pink dresses to whet the appetites of the readers who have been rattling my cage for a new Blackbird book. (I put the series on hiatus back in 2008.) If you want to see the pink dresses, go to my Pinterest page:  http://pinterest.com/nanmart1/50-shades-of-pink/


Another confession:  I love Pinterest.  It feeds my urge to make ideas visual.  I wish I could paint or take decent photography, but I can’t.  I know what I see in my head, though, so Pinterest http://pinterest.com/  has become my latest addiction.

Third confession:  Back in the day when I wrote romance novels (almost 40) I read a lot of erotica so I could keep things . . . er . . . fresh.  I still have Anais Nin here on my shelf, and the Nancy Friday SECRET GARDEN book about female fantasies is around here somewhere. (I got creeped out, though, in the chapter about German shepherds.  I think I have a relatively open mind, and I believe people should do whatever floats their boats as long as nobody gets hurt, but the dog thing . . . nope, I couldn’t see it.)



Surrender the pink?  Sure, if that’s the way you roll, why not? Bondage, though, weirds me out. I have a true shrieking abhorrence of anything resembling torture, so bondage is outside my comfort zone. Which is why I’m really not going to buy 50 SHADES OF GRAY.  (I did download the sample on my iPad.  But for the first 50 pages nothing happened, and if there’s anything I learned from writing romance novels it’s this: Stuff has to happen and happen fast or your reader gets bored.)

My daughter points out that her generation feels differently about bondage.  To those young ladies, getting tied up may be a welcome rest after a long day.  They have high-pressure careers, maintain long-distance friendships and take care of family, too—so they are relieved that somebody else takes charge in the bedroom. (Nancy Friday’s theory was that women fantasized about bondage because if they were tied up, they couldn’t be blamed for enjoying the sex forced upon them.  Back then, good girls felt guilty about having fun in bed. Boy, have times changed, or what?)


Another lesson learned from writing romance? Women like their sex in print, so when I set out to write the Blackbird Sisters Mysteries, I knew I had to appeal to my longtime romance readers with a few racy bits. (Which is probably why my books have never really been embraced by diehard mystery readers.) Now--even more than the clothes--readers write to me about Nora’s love life. There’s definitely pink in Nora’s world.

So tell me.  What’s your opinion about sex in mysteries? Yea? Or Nay?
And if you’ve read 50 Shades of Gray? Tell me your theory of its appeal, but here’s absolutely the most hilarious review of it:  http://www.goodreads.com/review/show/340987215 Don’t have a mouthful of coffee when you watch, trust me.

Pick your favorite pink dress, too, would you? Dior? Givenchy? Versace? Or Michelle Obama’s simple sheath dress from Banana Republic? How do you roll?



NO WAY TO KILL A LADY, the 8th book in the Blackbird Sisters Mystery Series, will be released next week, on August 7th.  A few years ago, Jennifer Crusie said, “Great clothes, great mystery, great fun.”  A blurb that still makes me happy!
Find Nancy Martin on Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/authornancymartin 
Her website:  http://www.nancymartinmysteries.com 

On Pinterest: http://pinterest.com/nanmart1/ 
But not on Twitter, because the whole tweeting thing just isn’t sexy.