How different are you from where you began? by Jenn McKinlay

FIRST THINGS FIRST: Our winner for Jill Orr's giveaway copy of The Good Byline is Karen from Ohio! Email your address to jennmck at yahoo dot com and I'll forward your info to Jill. Congrats!

Jenn McKinlay: So, Hooligan 1 graduated the other night. It was a pretty big deal, mostly, because it was a photo finish as we do love the drama in this house! I'm not sure if my tears were more excitement and pride or straight up relief. Probably, a bit of both.

The Graduate and his squad!

I asked Hooligan 1 if it was okay for me to blog about his scholastic journey, and I'm putting it on the record that he gave me his consent. Okay, it was really more of an "I don't care". Close enough! I've always tried to respect the hooligans' privacy. I cringe when I see parents offering up their kids' lives for public consumption, because it feels wrong to invade their personal lives, especially during the teen years, but that's a whole other blog post. For this one, I have permission, so here it is.

Hooligan 1 came into the world reluctantly (i.e. a vacuum was employed) and he stayed pretty self contained (shy) until his comrade in arms arrived a year and half later, yes, that would be Hooligan 2! Insta best friends, who shared a room and lived in each other's hip pockets, their bond was unbreakable. This worked well for H1, as H2 did most of the talking for both of them, right up until it was time to start school. I can remember walking H1 to preschool, trying to sell him on the idea, saying, "It's gonna be so great, you're going to make friends--" My precocious three year old looked at me and said, "I don't need friends, I have Brother." Oh, boy.

                            Hooligan Bruhs!






H1 did not make friends easily. Because he had Brother, he didn't feel the need. Leaving H2 in preschool to go to elementary school  and be on his own was so traumatic, H1 taped a picture of me to the inside of his lunch box. No, not kidding. The days were long and H1 spent a lot of time on the side of the playground, looking for a friend and feeling lonely. It was tough for us all. When Brother joined him at school, it became easier. 

Thankfully, during the middle years, H1 slowly became more social. Friends came and went and came and went until a squad was finally formed. The same squad that would carry him through, since he and Brother were once again parted, as H1 moved on to high school. His academics resembled my own. Entertaining teachers were his favorites and he aced those classes. Boring teachers, well, it was a struggle. But the kid who'd always been quiet and introverted, sustained by his overabundance of imagination, slowly started to open up, going after what he wanted and learning how to bounce back up after a fail. It was a remarkable thing to watch but still he kept to himself and was fairly guarded unless with trusted friends.

Giving his final speech - like a boss!

And then the end of high school came into view, and the teen who'd always been a bit aloof, signed up for a live news class. The shell cracked wide open! A passion for film making was discovered and suddenly, his big head was popping up on the white board as he anchored the daily news. If someone could have told my poor mama heart that the lonely first grader who had no words would bloom into such a talking head twelfth grader, well, it would have spared me a truck load of angst. 

He has given me much to ponder. Up until now, I'd always believed that people don't really change that much in life, and I've always dealt with my characters this way. A quiet child was a self contained adult, a mean toddler was a nasty grownup, etc. I figured nurturing smoothed out the rough edges, but nature was the defining factor of a person's core personality (I say this as a person who has always been an extreme extrovert and can't imagine being any other way.) Who we are from the start is essentially who we'll always be, right? Right?! Erm...maybe not. After watching H1's metamorphosis -- seriously, a chrysalis to a butterfly -- I have to say, I'm rethinking. 

So, tell me Reds and Readers, are you pretty much who you were as a kid or have you changed significantly over the years?