"From the Comfort of My Couch"

INGRID THOFT
One day I was sitting with my sister and her daughter discussing books, and we started talking about autobiographies.  We mused about what we would entitle our autobiographies, and although I don't remember most of the conversation, I do remember my niece's suggestion for my sister's book.  She declared that it should be called "From the Comfort of My Couch," which cracks us up to this day.  

My sister is the most tenacious, courageous person I know—in matters of life, however, not thrill-seeking.  In fact, it has become a hobby of mine to find photos and videos that will get her feet sweating and prompt an unequivocal "heck no!" from her when I share them.  

Some of these photos and videos are from my own adventures.  My husband and I have made it our mission to take pictures while scuba diving that we're sure will get a reaction.  For instance, my encounter with a giant Potato Cod fish on the Great Barrier Reef freaks her out no matter how many times she's seen it.

On a recent scuba diving trip, we filmed a shark swimming towards us with the great deep blue sea behind him, which is another one of her favorites—sharks and the infinite creepiness of the ocean.

Photo courtesy of Video Vision 360/Natura Vive

I also like to bring travel opportunities to her attention, like the Natura Vive Skylodge in Peru.  What could go wrong, sleeping in a glass pod 1,312 feet above the floor of the Sacred Valley?  Her first question (and mine) was how do you answer the call of nature?!

And how about learning to wing walk on her next vacation?  That sounds exciting, and I'm sure it will get more than just her feet sweating!

Truth be told, I have no interest in sleeping cliff side in a glass pod or walking on an airplane wing mid-flight, but her reaction is so satisfying, I can't stop making these types of suggestions. 

I asked her if I could write about this, and she was happy to indulge me, but she insisted that I include two things that really give her the willies:

The perspective of looking up at cruise ship from below:

This is the best I could find!  Note the man in the tiny skiff.

and hot dog eating contests!

Go figure!

What do you say, Reds and Readers?  Do your feet sweat when you see a shark?  Do hot dog eating contests give you the willies?  Do you lovingly torment your siblings in a similar fashion?

The Only Thing We Have to Fear...

RHYS: Halloween is almost upon us. How could we forget? All the stores are full of creepy things—fake blood dripping from severed fingers, zombies rising from tombstones, the grim reaper waiting to grab the unwary.  And worst of all, fake hairy spiders in webs.  I have to confess that I’ve never been to keen on  Halloween.  I don’t mind the candy (and yes, I do buy about three packets too many of Snickers and Kit Kat) but I don’t like being scared.  I guess that’s why I don’t read or watch horror. It’s all too real to me. I can tolerate the type of horror movie in which giant tomatoes swallow Manhattan, but movies like the current Annabelle in which a doll is possessed by a demon and a baby is in grave danger…. There  is no way I’d ever want to watch.

Okay, I’m a wimp, I know. Or I am blessed with too vivid an imagination. I can tell myself they are only actors, but it’s no good. I’m actually not at all scared of snakes. I killed four copperheads when we lived in Texas.  I guess we all have silly, irrational things that we are scared of. Some people are scared of clowns. I’ll confess to being scared of the dark, of spiders AND of moths. I don’t like the way they flutter at me. And once my family rented a condo in Mazatlan, Mexico and we saw a black moth with a wing span of about eight inches (I’m not kidding). It was fluttering in the palm trees outside our condo.  I went out and when I came back the kids said, “Hey mom, that moth went into your bedroom.”
“Ha ha,” I said. “Very funny.”
“No, really,” they said.
I didn’t believe them. I went into the bedroom and started pulling back the blinds around each window. “You see” I said “You can’t scare me with your silly….” And then it flew out in my face.  My scream could be heard by passing cruise ships.
But as well as moths my other irrational fear is of showers. I’m always afraid I’ll turn it on and get a blast of cold water coming at me, Or I’ll turn it the wrong way and be scalded to death. So  I have to turn on the tap very carefully while still outside the shower, then ease myself inside. Silly, huh?
So Reds, do confess. Do you have any silly or irrational fears? Do you like being scared?

LUCY BURDETTE: wow, Rhys, I would have screamed too! Here's one of the things I hate most: house centipedes. The worst moment came two weekends ago. I'd brought my fancy black dress with feathers all around the knees. When I went to take it out of the closet, one of those creatures burst out of my feathers. I screamed and screamed and John had to go in there and hunt it down. I worried all night that there were more hiding in my finery!

I'm scared of other things, like crazy maniac drivers on highways, but that seems reasonable to me...

HANK PHILLIPPI RYAN: No. I do not like being scared. I do not like being surprised. And I do not like crawly things. If I saw a centipede? I would completely disapparate.  I recently posted a photo of a HUGE spider on Facebook, it was in our back yard and I was incredibly proud of myself for taking the photo without flinching. .Too much. If I see a spider in the house? Forget about it.  Why is that so scary? They are small, and not particularly fast. Once i had a BAT in my condo. I was by myself, so I knew I could either freak out or handle it. And I was alone. I mean--a BAT! It's a long story, but I prevailed. I am loathe to admit it, but if I see any kind of bug, I call Jonathan. Is that--awful?

Maniac drivers--they are ridiculously everywhere. And pedestrians who SAUNTER, or LEAP out, and are on the phone.. And I am the most scared of something bad happening to someone I love. But that's not silly.

JULIA SPENCER-FLEMING: I admit to getting creeped out when I'm alone at night in an old house or the library. I KNOW there's no one lurking in the dark and I don't believe in ghosts or other Hallowe'en-type phenomena, but it sets me on edge just the same. And of course, whenever my kids are traveling or driving or (and this is a BIG bugaboo) swimming in the river, I'm afraid Something Bad will happen to them. But like Hank, I can't really say that's silly.

I do have one that it genuinely silly. Ever since I read a scene in one of Lee Child's books where someone looks through the peephole in a hotel room and gets shot in the eye, I've been afraid to look through peepholes. Since I'm not a Russian mobster or corrupt military officer (frequent victims in Lee's books), I can rationally state my chances of getting shot in the eye are extremely low. But still.

HALLIE EPHRON: Lucy's house centipedes terrify me, too. They're like creatures from another planet. And they slither up from the drains. And... AAAAAGGGH!

And oh thanks, Julia. Now I'll be afraid to look through peepholes in doorways.

I get really creeped out by portraits where the eyes "follow" you. Walking through a spider's web and feeling it stuck to my face, wondering if the spider was in it... Not so much of things that go bump in the night -- it never occurred to me it could be ghosts when we had squirrels move into our attic. And I do love a good ghost story.

TELL US ABOUT THE KANGAROO

HANK PHILLIPPI RYAN: Kangaroo? You'll see in a minute.

But I was looking through all the books we talked about yesterday--and it's so fascinating to see what a range there is! From Liz Mugavero's  fun cozy KNEADING TO DIE to the Susan Elia McNeal's smart

historical adventure HIS MAJESTY'S HOPE to Debs police procedural THE SOUND OF BROKEN GLASS to the oh-so-contemprary struggles in Jon McGoran's DRIFT to the downright creepy insidious nightmare-inducing NOS4ATU by Joe Hill.

Which is what I'm reading right now. And I almost..don't want to. It's so creepy--not gory-creepy, but shiver up the back creepy, that reading it at night is not quite..comfortable.

Which is the whole point.  It's scary good.

So you know how much we love to introduce you to new authors--Colby Marshall has a thriller THE TRADE coming out any second now--and her debut CHAIN OF COMMAND now on sale! And she says: Be very afraid. That's the whole point.

SCARY GOOD!

     Colby Marshall

I have a confession to make: I am not fearless.

When you write about and read about all things terrifying, it’s easy to pretend you have it so together that nothing scares you, but the truth is, one of the reasons I write about the creepy, frightening side of the human race is because it does scare me.  So do kangaroos.  I was kicked by a beast of one of those once, but I think that’s another story for another time.

While researching for books, I consult with a forensic psychiatrist on different motivations a killer in a specific novel might have. Usually, when I explain my scenario to him, he references his own real-life cases to explain to me why the diagnosis of a particular mental disorder or personality disorder may fit the character in question. Stories I write tend to start with the seed of a true crime article or book I’ve read somewhere along the line. The tiny spark lit by the article will then ignite in my mind, where I twist it into something that could actually happen and maybe even does.

Trust me, this makes for some unsettling moments.  At least when a kangaroo kicks you, you know the face of the evil you’re facing. When your imagination is wild, you can work yourself up pretty well. I tend to lock my bedroom door behind me at night, even when all of the doors of my home are locked, too. I’m not paranoid…much…but I’m aware of the how my characters are often oblivious, too, right before something bad happens to them.

So if what I write or read is truly scary, then why read and write about fear and things that could really happen? Happily-ever-after and bubbly, fluffy fairy tales would be so much more fun, right?

BONK!

I think people do need happily-ever-after, and I think they need fluff, too.  But that said, I think fear is needed, too.  Fear is a reminder that for every time there's something of which we’re afraid, there’s a brave soul inside willing to combat the apprehension. Sure, we love the adventure and thrills we’re greeted with per minute in these types of books, but we also love the characters we root for.

 We find ourselves pulling for the good guys to win, because we see the parts of us in them that won’t give up. 

In characters who fight for the good in any story, we recognize a little bit of ourselves: the parts of us we have to believe could survive, could stand for justice, and could rage against the evil in our society if we were faced with the scenarios our favorite characters are.

In other words, through fear, we find hope.

Do you write or read scary books? Why or why not? Is there anything so scary you’ll shy away from reading or watching?  A signed copy of my new book, THE TRADE, which comes out June 11--to one lucky commenter!

HANK: All together now: TELL US ABOUT THE KANGAROO!

**********************

 Writer by day, ballroom dancer and choreographer by night, Colby has a tendency to turn every hobby she has into a job, thus ensuring that she is a perpetual workaholic.  In addition to her 9,502 regular jobs, she is also a contributing columnist for M Food and Culture magazine and is a proud member of International Thriller Writers and Sisters in Crime.

  She is actively involved in local theatres as a choreographer as well as sometimes indulges her prima donna side by taking the stage as an actress.  She lives in Georgia with her family, two mutts, and an array of cats that, if she were a bit older, would qualify her immediately for crazy cat lady status. 

 Her debut thriller, Chain of Command is about a reporter who discovers the simultaneous assassinations of the President and Vice President may have been a plot to rocket the very first woman—the Speaker of the House—into the presidency.  Chain of Command is now available, and the second book in her McKenzie McClendon series, The Trade, is due for publication by Stairway Press in June 2013.   

Chain of Command is now available at Amazon, Barnes and Noble, Sony, iBooks, Kobo, other major e-readers, directly from the publisher at StairwayPress.com (free shipping), or in select independent bookstores.

Watch the official book trailer for Chain of Command here: http://tinyurl.com/auye6bb.  

The Trade (due out June 11, 2013): Stolen lives…

Reporter McKenzie McClendon is on the trail of her next hot story, tracking a sadistic serial killer known as The Cradle Robber. This brutal murderer preys on pregnant women, slicing their infants from their wombs, leaving the helpless women to die while he disappears with their babies.

Aided by former Navy SEAL Noah Hutchins and a clever FBI data specialist, McKenzie races to unravel the web of lies, drawing dangerously closer to the ruthless, brilliant surgeon at the heart of the maze. With a child’s future hanging in the balance, the lives of five people careen toward a terrifying collision. It’s up to McKenzie to discover which key will unlock the puzzle, and which will get her killed.

The Trade is currently available for pre-order on stairwaypress.com with free shipping, and until it’s release date on June 11, you can pre-order The Trade together with a copy of Chain of Command and get BOTH for only $19.99 (over $31 separately)!  Will be available on Amazon, Barnes and Noble, iBooks, Kobo, and other major e-readers June 11, 2013.

Watch the official book trailer for The Trade here: http://tinyurl.com/lqjcb8v  You can learn more about Colby and her books at www.colbymarshall.com