The Worst Writing Advice I've Ever Gotten

JENN McKINLAY: I was scrolling through Twitter this week when a thread popped up asking authors what the worst writing advice they'd ever gotten was. Author Victoria/V.E. Schwab was the twitterer who lobbed the question out there and it garnered almost 1,000 comments. Clearly, there is a lot of very bad writing advice out there!

The Tweet that started it all.

It certainly got me thinking about the worst advice I've ever received. My path to authordom was a long and winding one, in fact, you could say I took the long way around - the really long way around. I decided to be a writer at sixteen, didn't start writing until I was twenty-five, and sold my first book when I was thirty-two. As you can imagine, I was given much unsolicited advice over the years from the moment I decided to be a writer to the first book sale. And I've gotten plenty of advice since then, as well.

I think the piece of advice I dislike the most always starts with "You know what you should write..." which is then followed by some half baked potato of a plot in the speaker's head that they would write, you know, if they had the time. Uh huh.

Other gems include:

1. You should just be your own agent. How hard can it be? Am I right?

No. I don't want to be an agent. I want to be a writer. Duh.

2. Don't overuse "said" as a dialogue tag. Spice it up!

"No," she remarked/refused/retorted. Said is fine, thanks.

3. Write what you know.

Nope, and I'll tell you why...BORING! And if I'm bored writing it, you'll be bored reading it. Write what you care about would be much better advice.

4. Don't use the word "was". Ever.

Welp, I wasn't going to listen to you and now I'm really not. Yes, be aware of using the passive voice but that doesn't mean every use of the word was is bad. Sheesh!

5. Follow the market.

Oh, lord no! See number three, but also, once the Fifty Shades of Twilight with a Dragon Tattoo craze becomes obvious, it's usually over before you can pen your version of it. You do you is a much better way to go.

All right, Reds, you're up. What's the worst writing advice you've ever gotten? Readers, what horrible suggestions have you heard?