JULIA SPENCER-FLEMING: It's that very special moment in the run up to Christmas today - still early enough to get the presents in the mail if you pay for rush delivery, but you've also exhausted any and all naturally occurring ideas for what to give. This is the moment for which Gift Guides are made.
I know I'm not the only person who has a love/hate relationship with "Top Ten Gifts for The Holidays" and "25 Gifts They'll Love to Receive." Not to mention the ubiquitous "50 Stocking Stuffers Under $50." $50 for a stocking stuffer?!? Girl, when I was a kid we got a pack of cards and some Pixie Stix and we were grateful.
If you're still shopping, I'm here to curate the already curated collections, and share the good, the bad and the ugly.
The Good:
Temperature controlled smart mug.
At first I thought, what in the overly-online world is this nonsense? But then I started to think about the five or six cups of tea I drink every day, and about how quickly they get cold in the winter, and how depressing it is when you reach for the mug without really paying attention because you're really into what your writing and - yuch! It's gone sad and cold. Would I pay $79 to avoid that? Yes, yes I would.
The Bad:
Monogrammed socks.
Do you have a self-important @$$hole in your life? Does he talk about venture capital and effective altruism? He is the one and only market for these.
The Ugly:
Wine bottle chiller.
Nothing says "I love wine" in a sophisticated way like clamping a bottle into a brand-name extruded plastic container before pouring. Either invest the big bucks into an under counter wine cooler or think ahead and stick the Prosecco into your fridge like the rest of us.
The Good:
Cashmere crewneck for under $100
Nice, soft, cozy, and if you take proper care of it (hand wash in cold, use a sweater razor to remove pills) it'll probably last quite some time. Everybody looks good in a basic like this, and unless you're living in Key West (lookin' at you, Lucy) everyone could use something warm in winter.
The Bad:
Le Creuset Mini Coquette
First off, this is not a "gift under $50," because in order for someone to use them, you need at least four, for a total of $88. Secondly, if the recipient already has Le Creuset, you better know their color, because fans get VERY VERY picky about what's in their kitchen. (Mine is Flame, in case anyone wants to surprise me with an expensive and very heavy present.) Finally, how often does anyone really use a mini coquette? Get a four-quart casserole dish for $74 instead; that'll hold a lot of coq au vin.
The Ugly:
On Cloudmoster sneaker.
Have you ever wondered what it would look like if you strapped egg cartons to the bottom of your sneakers? Wonder no more, my friend.
Wirecutter from the New York Times
The Good:
Garden kneeler
I'm getting this for my daughter-in-law next year. These things are great for everyone; those of us with bombed out knees, like me, those of us who want to protect their joints, and little kids, who can sit and "help" with some weeding. "No, darling, that's a carrot. Can you put it back?"
The Bad:
Fake old sweats
I'm sorry - almost $300 for a sweatsuit? (Yes, the pants are also $148.) Are you crazy?!?
The Ugly:
Outdoor color-blocked blanket/poncho
"Hello, rugged outdoorsman! I see you are wearing a color-blocked quilted poncho, which is also a groundcover you can sit on if you avoid the slit in the middle. How foolish I feel, spending all these years wearing a jacket and sitting on a padded tarp!"
And now, the grande dame and queen of all Gift Guides: Oprah's Favorite Things 2025!
The Good:
Wrist-warmer gloves
The Bad:
Concept2 Cross County Ski Thingy
No, it's not the price. You get what you pay for in exercise equipment. And it's a kind of cool idea - designed for cross country skiiers, your feet (and those all important knee joints) stay stable, while you work the heck out of your arms.
But these are supposed to be gifts. For someone else. There was a whole internet-and-battling-ads kerfluffle when a 2019 Peleton commercial showed a model-thin woman getting a stationary bike as a present from her husband. Now imagine what message you're sending when your loved one sees this by the tree on Christmas morning. "Hey, sweetheart! I've noticed your back and arms are gettin' a little flabby there! Here ya go!"
The Ugly:
Sneex. Snix. Sneakyheels.
What do you think, dear readers? What are the good/bad/ugly gift ideas you've run across?
I'm alternately laughing and cringing at some of these, Julia. Since I never look at those gift guide things, it's all new to me. [But the mug and the gloves strike me as good ideas.] . . . .
ReplyDeleteYes, I just might stop someone in the airport to ask what they were thinking with those whacko shoes.
ReplyDeleteI also recommend author Naomi Kritzer’s website for her annual “Gifts For People You Hate” list.
Julia, simply by looking at the gift guides, aren't you setting yourself up for repeated feelings of abject horror at all the bad things they suggest as great gift ideas?
ReplyDeleteI never look at the guides. First, who has the time? Second, other than my nephew everyone in my life either gets books or gift cards for books. I take all the guessing game aspect out of gift-giving.
Some of those boggle the mind! The only ones I would consider are the cashmere sweater and the gloves, except I already have a pair of fingerless that do amazing job at keeping my wrists warm. Sometimes that's all you need.
ReplyDeleteAlso, for keeping your tea hot, get yourself a Contigo travel mug for under twenty dollars. My coffee is staying hot in mine on my desk right now, even though my only travel was thirty seconds up the stairs from the kitchen.. They have a metal - not plastic - base, come in pretty colors, and are entirely analog. Now that's a stocking stuffer!
I agree with Jay; the gift guides are a total time suck as the ideas are mostly useless. I did snap a picture at Walmart of the OXO tot grape cutter and send it to my sister captioned, “For the Person who has Everything.” I think it was around 12-15 bucks. I didn’t buy one.
ReplyDeleteSpeaking of time sucks, I spent 40 minutes in line to mail out my packages yesterday….and felt grateful that it wasn’t any longer! I had allowed myself 90 minutes before an appointment elsewhere so I was able to reward myself with precious reading time. My packages all had an estimated arrival date of the 20th. Hope that pans out.
This made me laugh out loud! But I have to admit I got an old friend (who needs nothing but we exchange gifts anyway) socks with photographs from a vacation we took. Hopefully that’s a little better than the monogrammed socks!
ReplyDeleteI can vouch for the Garden Kneeler. My mother had one, a gift from my brother, and used it a LOT. I think it was her favorite gift ever, which makes me a little bummed that I hadn't thought of it.
ReplyDeleteIt always amazes me the kind of overpriced nonsense that ends up in stores this time of year. Stuff that no one needs, EXCEPT for the last minute shopper who has to buy SOMETHING for Great Aunt Dorothy and will grab the first thing they see. I remember the Christmas Eve shopping panic back when I worked retail. Guys would come in looking for an item we were out of (because the rest of the shoppers had bought them all), and in a fit of despair would say, "Give me anything. She can return it later." [sigh]