Saturday, October 26, 2019

Little Boosts to Happiness

LUCY BURDETTE: I want to chat today about little life tweaks that can give us a lift in an increasingly grim world. (I feel a little bit like Maria in the Sound of Music singing “My Favorite Things” during the thunderstorm, but that’s okay.) My best ideas come from Miss Gloria, Hayley’s roommate in the Key West mysteries. (I know, she’s not a real person—go figure.) Here’s something she says in THE KEY LIME CRIME as they’re learning to make pie:

Miss Gloria clapped her plastic-covered hands together. “I feel like we’re Lucy and Ethel in the chocolate shop, remember that episode in I love Lucy? I watch it once a week, along with the video about the cat who sings Twinkle Twinkle Little Star with his owner. With the world such a mess, it pays to find things that make you laugh.”

Naturally those two videos are ones I adore too. I can't tell you how many times I've watched the singing cat. I'm pretty sure I'm in love with both the cat Sammy, and his owner: 



Of course, reading a great book gets me out of present world for a while too—I’m leaning toward not too dark these days. Yoga. I committed to myself to do more of this and I’ve found a teacher I love. 


Noticing little amazing things in nature and feeling full of awe can give me a boost too. Here's one example. T-bone was helping me look at my email the other morning while I had coffee. The sun was streaming in the window, and highlighted his ear. Holy cow, look at the gorgeous, intricate pattern of veins!


Going to the movies more often helps too—we’ve seen WHERE’D YOU GO BERNADETTE, DOWNTON ABBEY,  PAVAROTTI, ROCKETMAN, and YESTERDAY. 

Another thing that helps is doing something to boost someone else’s spirits, like taking buttery corn muffins to a friend who’s undergoing chemotherapy. (I'll post the recipe tomorrow...)

What would you add to the list?

47 comments:

  1. Those are all wonderful ideas, Lucy, and goodness knows we need all the happy thoughts we can muster. I’d add a lovely song, the laughter of a child, a “just because” smile from someone you pass in the bookshop, and those little stories of kindness that somehow creep into the news [and onto Facebook] some days . . . .

    Oh, and I love the "Twinkle, Twinkle" cat!

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    1. Great additions Joan! Isn’t that cat wonderful? I’d like to teach T-bone to sing, I think he’s smart enough LOL

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  2. All good ones. Going for a long walk somewhere quiet. Baking. Refreshing the turquoise stripe in my silver hair. And, if possible, hanging out with my favorite toddler!

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    1. Also, I was traveling yesterday and didn't get to your post about series versus standalones. Just read it now! And I'm going to check back to the content for our Crime Bake panel...

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    2. Walking is good, especially if you don’t take the news with you. Now I will go read yesterday’s comment. Thanks Edith!

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  3. Walking in nature is a good one. Helping someone in need ( pay it forward ). Meeting with family and friend. The smell of something baking.

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  5. We've seen four of the five movies you mention, Lucy Roberta, and "Yesterday" is on the TBS list. We also watched the Ken Burns PBS series on county music, a pure pleasure from start to finish. And a couple of weeks ago we went to the opera, Turandot. For non-opera buffs, this is the Nessun Dorma one.


    There's been a TV News blackout at our house for nigh onto four years now. We do scan the headlines and read what we need to know about. We politely limit political discussion with friends by singing La la la la la la and covering our ears. His name is verboten in conversation.

    Books are my escape from grim reality, also BBC Britcoms. Right now we are bingeing on QI, the ones post-Stephen Fry. If you have Britbox and the need to laugh, I highly recommend this. It is completely irreverent, and the panel is filled with Oxbridge people. Along the way you just might learn some very interesting facts. The moderator is Sandi Toksvig. You might recognize her from the latest Best British Baking Show. She is brilliantly funny and brilliantly brilliant. She makes me happy. Try it.

    This morning we depart for Dallas, spending a week with my daughter and then off to Bouchercon. Just think, all the Reds under one roof! And it looks as if the weather will be great, mid sixties. Dallas in October can still be beastly but it's almost November, and that helps.

    See ya there!

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    1. I had forgotten all about the country music series. Will have to watch that. And thanks for the other suggestions—can’t wait to see you in Dallas!

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  6. I just flew from San Francisco to Vancouver at sunset - watching that changing sky and landscape inspires profound awe and joy - just taking time to notice this beautiful world we live in makes me happy - also looking at pictures of my grandchildren

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    1. Yes we have to notice what’s around us. We are so looking forward to see our grandkids in December!

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  7. Ann, I admire your tv new blackout. My husband squeaks in an extra hour of PBS, but I am really done after the local news. Also, agree with the La-la-la-la, although we live in an area with more people who agree with our viewpoint than not.
    Lucy, I'll watch the cat video later. I hate to miss out on something that everyone else says is so much fun. It is good to have something that you know always will tickle your funny-bone.
    We've been reading tons of books here and record and watch our favorite shows, although the list is shrinking.
    Walking in nature does help. Our German Shephard is older, so we don't walk as far as we used to with him but we still go out each day.
    The other thing for me, I found THIS blog. So thanks, Jungle Reds, for a pretty happy conversation to participate in each day.

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    1. Thanks Judy—we are so happy to have you all joining the conversation every day!

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  8. Absolutely needed--these moments of beauty and laughter. All of the above. Walking the nature trails with my 4-year-old grand-nephew. The cats' antics. A cup of hot chocolate, especially when there's whipped cream (memo to self: buy whipped cream!). Listening to my nephews making music. And favorite Youtube clips. One that always gets a laugh from me is a Britain's Got Talent clip of a father-son duo parodying Michael Flatley and Riverdance. Also Randy Rainbow's 'Very Stable Genius' and 'Desperate Cheetoh'--sheer genius!

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    1. Going to go look those up. Yes put whipped cream on the list!

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    2. Oh my gosh, we are huge Randy Rainbow fans. He is hilarious. And so talented.

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  9. I look out my window and see trees in front of my house and on the hill across the road. When all the leaves are on I can't see anything but nature - no roads, no house, no wires. Everyday the view changes just a little bit and I can never decide which I prefer - trees in full leaf or beautifully bare. I'm glad I don't have to decide; all I need do is wait.

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  10. You know what… Every night I go out and look at the stars. Just for two minutes. Somehow, it is very reassuring. I’m times it happens when I get home from work, it is already dark and I just paused for a moment in the driveway and look up. sometimes it is right before we go upstairs, I just open the door and look outside. I also do it during the day. When I go outside, rushing rushing rushing, sometimes I tell myself just stop— look at the sky.

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    1. Perfect Hank! Reminds us that there are things much bigger than we are!

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  11. Our daughter-in-law does a great job of taking and posting pictures of our grandkids, and those invariably cheer me up. Reading a new book in a favorite series, with familiar characters, can be quite comforting. We just got back from a few days at World's End state park, and while it was quite taxing it was a lot of fun. I've got the routine down for hauling my dialysis stuff with us. And my weekly bridge game is a reliable spirit-lifter.

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    1. Pix of the kids are always good for a lift. This morning it was Henry in the pumpkin patch. And earlier this week my nephew’s boy taking his first steps. Baby Frankenstein! So funny and miraculous

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  12. Books, movies, and funny videos also check my boxes when I need to escape. Time spent cuddling with the pets helps--my big, beautiful border collie girl always knows when I need some "therapy" time.

    Yesterday I got to indulge in one of my favorite spirit lifters: I met with two friends at our regular "hair party." For the past ten years we've all been going to the same wonderful hair stylist. We make all our appointments as a block at the end of her day, and then we all sip wine and nosh on snacks, catch up on the life events and speculate on what comes next. Some us drink; some of us don't. Some of us have wild stories to tell; some of us listen quietly and take the time to relax. It's all okay. No judgements. We laugh a lot. Yesterday we introduced a new young friend to the tradition, and she fit in beautifully. I hope she comes back.

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    1. That’s a wonderful tradition GIgi! I hope she does too

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    2. Late in her life, my mom used to make chicken and dumplings for friends that weren't feeling well. It's so much easier now with all the cooking shortcuts out there. No need to stew that old hen all day. Lucy - your cornbread gifts remind me how easy it can be to be generous to others.

      Local news is pretty anxiety ridden around here so after it get the needed basics I flip the channel to either a early holiday shopping channel or endless holiday movies - a fast, easy distraction.
      Getting into nature isn't an option around here right now. You got out of Bay Area at the right time, Hallie.

      Gigi's haircut cocktail crew reminds me of those preschool moms monthly lunches. Those ladies were still getting together when their kids were well into our twenties, maybe early thirties.

      My Facebook feed has been showing the the amazing birds. The color combination that nature has put together is pretty amazing. I love your picture of your cat's ear, Lucy. I remember petting our pure black cat while she would sit in the window sill, in full sun. That dark fur was so warm and she loved being petted so much that she would follow is us across the sill and her purring was... fabulous. Great memory.

      As you know I like to crochet. I crochet for others, rarely for myself. Baby blankets for co-workers young enough to be having kids, which can me feel so old at times but I like to create that one of a kind gift. Some day I'll finish that shawl I started for me about five years ago. And as said earlier, finding, reading and being able to participate with all you on Jungle Red Writers is a great pause in my day.

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    3. I am one of the lucky friends, I'm very glad to say!! We do this every five weeks, and it is a touchstone for all of us. We've shared a lot (I cannot believe it's been ten years!!!), we laugh a lot, and as a bonus our hair looks great at the end of the day:-)

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  13. Yet another close friend of mine died last week, but this isn't about sadness and grief. My reaction this time, although there is of course sadness, is to reach out and grab the joy in life now. So, I've spent the night with my granddaughter, went to the amusement park with granddaughter and family, and gone to the Daniel Boone Tavern Hotel in Berea (KY) for my anniversary (something I'd been wanting to do). The next day, this last Thursday, we went on to Lexington, KY and spent the afternoon with our son, stumbling upon the Big Red BBQ Restaurant in the countryside, a gem of a dive. The next morning before leaving Lexington, yesterday morning, we met up with a childhood friend of mine and his husband (both who now live in Arizona, but were in Lexington for a few days) and had a two-hour storytelling breakfast. Today, we're going to our daughter's Halloween party at their cabin on the Wabash River. Monday, I leave for a two-day trip with a friend to Nashville, Indiana to see the leaves and enjoy an arts and crafts stay there. I come back for a day and head to my hometown. Now, this visit will be for the memorial service for my friend who just died, but I know that there will be much laughing and remembering and great fellowship with other friends. So, I guess what I'm trying to do is to seek out the joy in doing these things I enjoy and not just thinking about doing them. Granted, there has been a little more activity and not as much rest as I might have sensibly planned out, but November has some serious stuff that might need my October of activity to fall back on.

    And, Lucy, I hadn't seen the cat video. Hilarious! Thanks!

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    1. Kathy, condolences on the loss of your friend. You have had a tough year, but it sounds like you are doing a great job at grabbing the joy. I only wish you were coming to Bouchercon--but at least I got to see you in St. Louis. That was such treat!!

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    2. Kathy- when my uncle died just days before his daughter's birthday, her friend, on her birthday, took her shopping, lunch, movie - day full of action instead being still. I'm sorry for your loss and applaud your being able to find the happy between now and the service.

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  14. I just "escaped" for a few days earlier this week. I drove out to LaGrange, TX. My remaining sister has 98 acres out in the country, horses, dogs, and cats. Her husband has been in China for almost a month teaching a class. Anyway she drove me to Bastrop so I could renew my driver's license, hassle-free. We went shopping at a store we had taken Mom to a couple of times on field trips. Laughing at Mom stories and youngest sister stories. Groused about our sometimes infuriating mildly autistic little brother. Gossiped about our big brother and his kids. We went out to eat at the local Mexican restaurant, one of the local barbecue joints, and a funky joint in Bastrop we'd taken Mom to. We watched a hilarious 9-episode show on HBO her daughter recommended called the Righteous Gemstones. I'm still laughing. Anyway my sister and I can have a good time no matter what.

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    1. Pat, at Round Top Antiques Fair year before last, I went to a great dinner put on at Rancho Pillow in LaGrange. Look up Rancho Pillow, it's quite something. And the dinner was one of my inspirations for Viv's luncheon menu in A Bitter Feast.

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    2. Thanks, Debs! I had heard of the feast in the field. Checked the website and Rancho Pillow is Round Top, not LaGrange. Otherwise I'm sure my sister would have checked it out all ready!

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  15. Somehow my comments ended up under Gigi's reply list. Oh, well, it's Saturday, I'll just go with the flow.... When does my vacation start?

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  16. Lucy, what a great post today. Right after I read it, I skimmed through my Bookbub selections for the day and found a book by the National Book Award writer Ross Gay, called The Book of Delights, essays that "illuminate the small pleasures of everyday life." Of course I bought it. I try to live those little blessed moments to the fullest. My walk along the Riverwalk in San Antonio the other day was just magical. Being outside (especially now that the heat has lifted), spending time with friends (hair party!) playing with the three-year-old granddaughter (absolutely the best stress relief), curling up with a good book at the end of the day. And so looking forward to seeing so many dear friends next week at Bouchercon!

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  17. OMG - that cat video! How have I never seen this? Oh, King George....

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    1. I know Jenn, we have to be able to do something with our cats! Imagine the viral marketing LOL

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  18. Yes, a great post. Years ago, my PTSD therapist told me to look for something special and good every day. Best advice ever. Our house is filled with laughter and stories of the antics of our pets. And my T-Bone look-alike adoptee is fitting in well. He's quite the character, trills like a bird, and each animal has funny personality quirks that we can enjoy. It's great stress relief laughing at a large cat trying to fit in a small box.

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    1. Animal quirks are the best, and so glad to hear your adoptee is fitting in well!

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  19. And PS, I also went shopping at our local Madison CT book store RJ Julia. It’s probably prohibited to say this, but I was Christmas shopping! I heard the most wonderful poet, John Kenny on NPR this morning. The book was called love poems for people with children and they were just hysterical and so Exactly on target. I recommend it for anyone who has small children. He gets it!

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  20. Awww, that was sweet. I do appreciate those little moments of sweetness. I generally take time to appreciate the cute children at library, Costco, restaurants, and share a smile or story, a bit of distraction. <3

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  21. Love this post. Since I read about hygge, the Danish tradition, I like to practice hygge and be comfortable. It can be anything from a happy novel like Alexander McCall Smith story to a refreshing cup of herbal tea.

    Diana

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  22. I sit for awhile on our front porch watching the birds & listening to their songs & watching the squirrels running around when I need a break from the too-harsh reality of our world. On facebook I like to see the Christmas posts with music. They are always cheerful to me. When I feel a complaint coming on I think of my daughter who is undergoing chemotherapy & dealing with it in such a brave, optimistic, uplifting way. She is such an inspiration to me.

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    1. Boy that helps put things in perspective, doesn't it Linda? We are sending our very warmest wishes to your daughter...

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  23. I read this lovely, so true post yesterday and when I wanted to comment, my laptop would not allow me to publish.We were away. And where we were was relevant. A short weekend trip to Adirondacks, just in time to catch the brilliant leaves before they were gone. We had a challenging (for us) hike through the stunning Ausable Chasm. And we found natural beauty at its most stunning - I love fall- and deep peace ( after the tourist season in the chilly North Country of NY). Bad timing for me as I leave for Bouchercon and an extended trip in TX in less than 48 hours! And worth every moment of panic now on Sun night

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