Monday, April 27, 2020

Close Quarters: What We've Learned About Our Loved Ones


FIRST, LET'S START OFF THE WEEK WITH SOME GREAT NEWS: RED HOT DEALS!


The ebook of Lucy Burdette's DEATH ON THE MENU is on sale for $1.99! Don't miss out on this fabulous series! 







also


The ebook of Hank Phillippi Ryan's THE MURDER LIST is ON SALE!  $1.99! 
So, yay, Reds and Readers, could you snap one up for yourself or a gift? No pressure, of course. It’s just my career….  It’s on all e-platforms, but here’s one link Click HERE!



And, now, our Monday Convo:

JENN McKINLAY: Okay, so AZ has been on lock down since March 23rd. The first few weeks were a mad scramble for toilet paper and flour. Then we settled in, trying to adjust to the new normal (oh, the horror!), and press on as much as we could with everyday life. Hub got used to working at home, the hooligans switched over to online school, my birthday and Easter were celebrated, well, with cake (see flour recon mentioned above). But now, now we’ve all been up in each other’s business 24/7 and, quite frankly, it’s getting old.


Here’s what we’ve learned. I sing all the time. I did not really know this about myself. I knew I hummed occasionally, but, no, the fam assures me, I am humming or singing ALL the time, everything from George Jones (The Race is On is a fave) to Janice Joplin to Bruno Mars. Oops!



We’ve also learned that Hooligan 1 is like a bear coming out of hibernation every night at one o’clock in the morning and cooks himself a full steak and potatoes meal. Hub has an inability to listen to an anecdote without peppering the speaker with questions in his impatience to get the whole story (former reporter), and Hooligan 2 works out, jumping rope and boxing, in the middle of the night - every night. Nothing like waking up to the smell of cooking steak and the sound of punching while Hub grills me with questions about what is that smell or noise. 


Overall, we’re managing by self distancing into various rooms in the house, but I can honestly say, I could have lived, quite happily, without knowing about all of our various quirks and weirdnesses. 


So, how about you, Reds, what are you learning about yourself - if you live alone like my mom, who has started having full conversation with her dog - and the ones you’re holed up with? 


RHYS BOWEN:  Also in Arizona where we are trapped until we can drive back to CA safely. It’s been a lovely place to hibernate with perfect weather, flowers, daughter nearby who bakes us bread so no real complaints. I knew my husband was annoying before this so no real surprises, except two nights ago when he decided to unpack 5 pound bag of coffee that had arrived that day and put it into jars at midnight. So I awoke to rattle, rattle Clonk and the smell of coffee. Totally unable to grasp what this could be. Then I was awake for hours. 
Jenn , I also sing/hum all the time. My subconscious chooses a song based on what I’m thinking or worrying about. Does yours?  And I’d kill any kid who cooked or boxed at night!  Remind them you are a professional. You can kill with no trace!

Jenn: LOL, Rhys! Yes, I must remind them of my skills!



LUCY BURDETTE: Honestly, it would be a crime for me to complain about being quarantined in Key West with my adorable husband and cat. But a girl can nitpick, right? No frying of steaks and potatoes in the night, but most days John will ask: when were you planning on using this chicken? (or ground beef, or sweet potatoes, or etc?) And what’s this in the freezer? Here’s the thing, I am planning, I have planned, I will continue to plan! And by the way, the thing in the freezer is what we’ll eat when and if we get sick, or if the food supply is cut off completely. 


That’s a small matter. But the toilet paper issue is a killer. I mostly use one bathroom and he uses another. I stock both with toilet paper as needed, and like everyone else, I’m on the lookout for replacement. Yesterday he said: “I looked in your closet, you have eleven rolls of tp. I’d call that bordering on hoarding.”


Me: “Tell me you’re not counting my toilet paper!” (Next it will be monitoring how much I use. And that my friends is when I might need help with a body…)





HALLIE EPHRON: We’ve been having groceries delivered and I’ve yet to score a single roll of toilet paper. Or bag of potato chips. 


What I’ve learned is that I crave citrus. Anyone remember the beginning of Rapunzel, where the queen has a craving for rampion (whatever that is) and steals it from the neighbor’s yard and suffers the consequences? I get it! I nearly went crazy craving citrus but fortunately our Peapod order finally arrived with two bags of tangerines. I know, what a first-world problem.


I’ve also learned how lucky I am to live with the man I married. He’s so easygoing. Good company. Changes lightbulbs and unclogs downspouts. Enthusiastically consumes whatever I cook. And it turns out all those years when he was shopping for yard sales? He’s accumulated all kinds of stuff that we are now using. (We’re on our third jigsaw puzzle.) 





DEBORAH CROMBIE: Since we are both  home all day normally, there haven't been any surprises or changes in schedule. But, Lucy, I had to laugh about John and the groceries. Since Rick and I now unpack and sanitize the groceries together, he questions every item. Did we really need this? Yes. Why is there so much fruit? Because I eat it! Etc., etc…


Although living with Mr. Preparedness has at times been very trying, since the coronavirus all his planning and organizing for every dire possibility has been very reassuring. And, yes, we even have respirators.

HANK PHILLIPPI RYAN: Lucy, I am already monitoring that. Four sheets at a time is plenty. I am SO SAD that I am doing that, and I didn’t mean to. Jonathan rolled his eyes when I mentioned it. But as I said--what can it hurt?

But we are kind of fine--seriously, I do a lot of pretending that everything will work out, because otherwise it’s too awful.  Jonathan works at the sunroom table, and I have my study, and he’s in charge of lunch and cleaning/vacuuming, and I’m in charge of shopping and  dinner, and cleaning the kitchen, and laundry. Breakfast is a duet.  He uses the treadmill in the exercise room, then I take a turn. It kinda works. 

The addition of doing the food planning, at such a tense level I mean, is surprisingly stressful. WE HAVE TO EAT THE LETTUCE! But let’s see if we can make it last three days. Okay, I’ll freeze the green beas, since they are perishable, but the cauliflower can stay in the fridge. Make beef stew, eat half and freeze half for the apocalypse.  I have never worked harder, somehow.

We already were very happy, I mean, before, but I can feel each of us being very conscious of staying calm and  considerate. For which I am grateful. 

Geez, I hope this is all worth it. It’s gotta be, right?

JULIA SPENCER-FLEMING: Hank, since the latest news about this Pandora’s Box of a virus is that 1) recovering from it doesn’t seem to confer any immunity against getting it again and 2) it can cause blood clots leading to organ failure, amputation or stroke, I’m going to say this is all, most emphatically, worth it. 

I’m trying to think of it as the same sort of life change we’ve all already experienced. Like going from single to married or living with. Holy cow, that was a trip, remember? Or, for those of who had kids, going from being a couple to parenthood. I sure wasn’t going out for leisurely brunches back then. Several of us have made big life moves - midwest to east coast, east coast to west, the UK to the US. Big differences in culture, food, where we went and what we did. This is another in a line of events that changed how we live our lives, and at least this time, I’m not dealing with the horror that was discovering my brand new husband left his dirty socks next to the bed EVERY NIGHT because he said - and this is 100% true - he would wear them the next day. And friends, I lived with that until the day he went into the hospice.

So, what was the question? My fam already knew I sing and hum constantly, so no news there. The girls are pretty much the way they’ve always been at home, and Boy on Loan is new, so we’re all discovering what it’s like to live with him. Biggest change has been for the Maine Millennial, whose pup is no longer going to doggy day care 4-5 times a week. It turns out Janey has a lot more energy to burn than previously realized, so they’re going out for two mile walks three or four times a day. The MM may be one of the few people who emerge from quarantine weighing less than when she went in.

HANK again: And yeah, Julia. With you on patience and flexibility. And that “no immunity” thing is controversial, and apparently misreported, so I’m hoping that's not the final-final word.

JENN: I just read about the stroke thing and happen to be writing about a character who is young and had a stroke, so...curse you writer brain!...material!

So, how about you, Readers, what are you learning about yourself or your cohabitors?


82 comments:

  1. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  2. We’ve been most fortunate in not having issues with running out [or running short] of anything . . .
    As far as meals are concerned, John happily eats whatever I cook, so it’s all just fine. [Well, mostly fine . . . I keep baking, so I’m going to need either a diet or an intense exercise program [or both] when we ever get to be un-quarantined.]

    We’re pretty much on the same schedule we’ve always been on, except that I don’t go anywhere and John still goes to the grocery store every day, so there are no real surprises about anything.

    But it’s not so easy for the girls. With one dad in Georgia and the other somewhere on a Navy ship, they’re both finding it difficult to do a full day’s worth of work for their jobs while being expected to teach the Little Ones and take care of everything around the house at the same time . . . .

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    1. Bless anyone who has to homeschool! The Hooligans would have been doomed if I’d had to teach them.

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  3. I am learning that, while I am an introvert, I still definitely need people in my life. This living alone and working from home thing is a killer.

    I'm definitely glad I am working from home because I think I would be insane by now if I didn't have that keeping me busy 40 hours a week.

    I hide from my problems in fiction. I don't feel like I am reading a done more than normal, but my pile of books read in April says otherwise.

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    1. Being alone is so much nicer when it’s by choice. I hear you!

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  4. My husband had been semi-retired for two years before the pandemic forced us to stay in place. That meant that at least once a quarter he was gone for 15 to 17 days. He was scheduled to go to Germany the end of March, and, of course that didn't happen. It will be at least next fall, if then, before he goes anywhere for work again. Before his semi-retirement he was gone full time and home about every two months for a few days or a week. So, I was getting used to him being home most of the time, with that nice little break every at least every three months, sometimes more like two and half months. Basically, I had to learn to live with someone again, and knowing I had that break, well, it made it easier. Now, no breaks. Most of the time we do pretty well, but there are some trying days indeed. Today, or rather yesterday now (Sunday), was one of those trying days. I think my main complaint is that I've been cooking and baking quite a bit, and I want him to be like Hallie's husband, enthusiastically eating the delicious meals I'm fixing. I fixed spinach and mushroom quiche again on Sunday evening, and it's like the same conversation every time I fix something. He starts eating it and doesn't say anything, I ask him if he likes it, he's says yes that it's good, and I say why couldn't you say that without me asking. My sister-in-law said that I should just not go to all the trouble I do, but I confessed to her that I can't stop myself. I've become addicted to cooking meals that require planning and work. It's the same for the baking. All of a sudden, I have to make dessert. I know lots of people are cooking and baking more, and I'm hoping I'll eventually snap out of it.

    Oh, Jenn, the singing. Yes, I sing around the house, too, and the crazy part of my singing around the house is that I make up little ditties about what I'm doing. For example, when squeezing the remaining moisture out of the spinach for the quiches, since I went ahead and made two, I would sing, "Gonna squeeze this moisture out of you, going squeeze it, squeeze it, squeeze it through," and other such nonsense. It's not cabin fever getting to me, as I've always made up these little songs. I don't sing those in front of husband though, because he might have grounds to commit me if I did.

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    1. Gonna squeeze it, squeeze it... Cracking up!! Which is reminding me how much more tuned in I've become to popular music. Love Meghan Trainor's "You're lying, because your lips are moving" - Dixie Chicks "Gaslighter" - maybe I'm starting to see a theme here?

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    2. LOL!!! I think my Hub would prefer it if I made stuff up - he gets tired of my “greatest hits”!

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  5. I am similar to Mark. I am an introvert who has lived alone since my university days. And growing up as an only child without pets I could bond with, I certainly could keep myself entertained/busy, often in the world of books.

    When people asked did I like living alone, I often used the phrase "alone but not lonely".

    But this time in self-isolation, I do miss the face-to-face human contact. My grocery, take-out meals and online deliveries are all left in the apartment building lobby so I don't even see the deliveryman. Every other contact has been online (JRW is the first blog I check each morning) and that has been good but I have not used Skype or Zoom to see another person's face.

    And no weird habits such as talking to plants or singing (yet)!

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    1. Give it time, Grace! The singing will come :) I’m so glad you’re with us!

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    2. I will deny any singing, Jenn...and there are no witnesses, lol!

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  6. I haven't discovered any new quirks about the man I live with, but I do wish he would do some of the extra chores he started doing a few weeks ago. When he works, he normally works at other people's houses, but now he's just here, reading or doing crosswords or watching movies, while I AM working. I'm getting a lot of shine on my halo reining in my annoyance...

    Jenn, are you saying before the quarantine your Hooligan's didn't make steak or work out in the middle of the night? Is it because their sleep habits have changed? I mean, they lived with you before, too.

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    1. Yes, now that they don’t have to be up early, every day is a weekend with their online school work done in the afternoon. It’s annoying.

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  7. Count me as another with a 17-year-old male child who comes out of his room after we've all gone to bed to raid the cupboards.

    However, I'm not sure I've learned anything new. It's just that the things I used to be able to shrug off are now like nails on a chalkboard.

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  8. First, I grabbed those deals and am telling my friends!
    Speaking of deals, here's the deal, the guy I married in the winter of '81 is the same guy who lives right here and he hasn't changed a bit. I cook, I shop, I clean, I do laundry, I bake. (Except he does vacuum if I ask him to.) It's all okay, you know, 'cause this is what I bought back then and I don't need to change him or me.

    I do need to share, however, and that is something I'm getting good at, begrudgingly. It's my computer, he bought it for my birthday, it's my Kindle, I bought it for this pandemic, it's my email, even! He uses them all and that is something that is way short of steaks and potatoes at 1:00 am or unpacking coffee at midnight.

    He gardens and he is doing some projects, although, those usually mean I drop whatever I'm doing so he can tell me what my role is in that project. Yeah, really.

    We are not short of anything except I'm a bit worried about flour, but have not run out.
    I talk to myself, narrating my day. Always have done! He sometimes mentions it, but heck.

    He knows about this blog and that everyone I speak to on it is very important to me, more than it was before this isolation.

    He knows I'm spending time writing reviews and spending lots of time up here in the office and that it is not a real job, but I enjoy it.

    We like the same music, classical and jazz and lots of rock and roll, the old time stuff. We enjoy some of the same tv shows and watch those together. We like a lot of the same books. Debs is one of his favorite writers. He just reread the Foundation trilogy after 40 years.

    So, we are kind to one another and we take walks with our old pooch, Kenai. We laugh lots. We Skype with the kids and grandkids. We missed 2 birthdays last week, sent gifts and love but it's not the same as hugs. I think we are doing okay.

    Last thing, Hank and Lucy, too funny about the tp. And it would be really funny if it wasn't in such short supply. We have enough. I was in the kosher market when they got a shipment in last week and I bought a package then. SO, good for another 2 weeks.

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    1. Oh, thank you so much for buying THE MURDER LIST and spreading the word! It makes such a huge difference… Thank you !

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    2. Judy, you are wise and wonderful and it sounds like you have it figured out! Thank you for all that you do for authors! Yay!

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    3. Judy, I think you deserve a halo for sharing the computer and the Kindle, lol! But I am glad he likes my books!

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  9. I haven't had any new insights about my husband, really. He's always been considerate and willing to do his half of the chores. And appreciative of my cooking. (He hates to cook, so is just grateful that he doesn't have to fend for himself.) He is markedly, decidedly NOT a handyman, and we have had a few little things go wrong at the house in these weeks that were a stark reminder of that weakness. But that was no surprise.

    Our 26-year-old son is living with us right now. There have been a few surprises there. The pleasant one was that while he was off living alone, he became a lot more considerate about picking up after himself. The more amusing one was that after living by himself for the past five years, he talks out loud to himself unabashedly. It is how he works through things. So I'll be at my computer working away and hear, down the hall, behind his closed door, the murmur of his voice, sounding like he's in a very engaging conversation. But when I've asked him if he was having a nice phone visit with a friend he says no, just saying his thoughts out loud.

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    1. Hooligan 2 does that, too! I always think he's talking to me. Argh! LOL.

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  10. I've fallen back in love with the telephone - Before we were locked down I hesitated to call people. Anxious about dropping into their lives unannounced. Now I'm happy to call and be called, since I know it's likely that nothing 'else' is going on.

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    1. I know! I never call anyone. Now I'm calling everyone. So strange how it's changed.

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  11. We had a small crisis: I geared up for serious weeding, armed with a dandelion poker and my rose pruners. My tools, from my tool bucket, for my exclusive use. Hubs wandered out, but couldn't find another poker or pruners. Sigh. We had to share, and then, wearing a mask, he hit the hardware store. Otherwise, we're in a daily routine.

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    1. It's amazing how it really does come down to the little things, isn't it?

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  12. All these years of living alone means that my life is not very different. Sometimes I have to remind myself that it's better to be alone than to wish that you were.

    I don't think I am singing out loud but I am definitely hearing music in my head. I'll wake up in the morning "hearing" a song I haven't heard for ages and wonder where it's come from. I'll hear it most of the day and then often I have to ask Alexa to play the song, which leads me to another song, and on and on.

    But I do talk to myself, out loud. I'm like twins and we argue with each other all the time. And last night I noticed a third twin who said "I guess she told you!" I sort of pretend I am talking to the dog, but we both know that's not true. This talking out loud is really worrying when I am working on a jigsaw puzzle. I seem to make a comment to every piece. That can't be normal, can it?

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    1. Totally normal. Just don't ask them to dance!

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    2. LOL - Because I saw Judy and Judi, I thought it was Judi answering herself. Ha ha ha ha ha!

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  13. Another introvert here and always happy with alone time--but, I am sorely missing the ability to just go! Anywhere. Need something from the grocery/hardware/drugstore? Just get in the car and go. Run over to visit a sister? Meet a friend for a walk, for lunch? I miss all of that. My companions--youngest just started vision therapy for the lingering effects of high school football concussion, now that's on hold. He retreated into depression, but is working his way back to optimism that all will be well. Nights and days turned around--and although I try to be patient, I confess I would have to bury his body in the backyard if he hit the punching bag at midnight--it's in the basement right below my bedroom. The guitar at midnight, well, okay, he's playing softly. Older nephew got a jumpstart on his college classes and is homeschooling a preschooler. He's taken over my computer in the living room, so he can keep an eye on the little one. This means I never get to use my living room. So now there's both a tv (extended version of LOTR this past week) and a computer set up in my bedroom. It's like being back in college with all my needs crammed into one room. Except I do have the cats to keep me company. Who knew they would enjoy LOTR as much as I do??

    I call my sisters a lot, check up on my brothers, and contact friends regularly. And every time I think the end might be in sight, some new piece of news comes out to shake my world--the blood clotting issue--it explained so much about why people of all ages would die so suddenly--and it's frightening. When I venture out to grocery shop--6 a.m. at the 60+ hour, I am shocked at the people who roam the isles with no mask, no consideration for themselves or other people. That's what scares me the most.

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    1. I feel the same. I keep thinking, surely, this is it. Nope. It used to be the days are long but the years are short but now I think the days are long, the months are long, 2020 is going to be looooooong. Sigh.

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  14. We are also sleeping a bit later, and going to sleep later. Our schedules have become pushed forward in a strange way. When this began, I would wake up really early in the morning. But not anymore. The good news and the bad news, I guess.

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    1. I have made this shift too, Hank: To bed later and up later in the morning. I rather like it.

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    2. I am the opposite. I normally got up at 5:00 am in retirement but now my wake up time is getting earlier @4:00, or sometimes even 3:00! So I am toast by 6:00 pm or 9:00 pm.

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    3. I'm trying to get up earlier, especially as the heat is creeping in here. If you want to go outside, it has to be early morning or late evening.

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  15. Like Mark and Grace, I'm an introvert and live alone but I certainly prefer to stay home when it is MY choice. I'm now craving real human contact .
    Jenn, I thought of you this morning. After one of your posts last year , I took my first shot of shingles vaccine, my second was supposed to be today but was postponed to the end of September if possible at this time.

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    1. I have the shingles vaccine on my list for the fall, also, Danielle. I wanted it a month ago, after FINALLY getting round to prioritizing it and then the pandemic hit. And I, too, credit Jenn's experience with getting it onto my personal list of things to get done.

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    2. Getting the Shingles vaccine is on my to-do list as well. And I also saw Jenn's experience as a wake-up call to get it done. Don't need another set of nasty side effects to thwart my happy retirement activities!

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    3. I was supposed to get my second shingles vaccine in January, but I was gearing up for knee surgery the first week in February, so put it off. Now who knows when I will be able to get it!

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    4. I got my second shingles vaccine in early or mid February, so I got in just under the wire for normal activity still going on.

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    5. Sorry for the delay, but so glad you got the first one. Shingles is the woooooorst. I have to wait to get mine but you betcha I'm going to!

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  16. Since Julie retired a year ago last fall, being together 24/7 is nothing new. The kitchen is my domain, all the cooking and most of the heavy cleaning in there, although she does put the dishes in the fridge and we both feed Penny and Eliot, me in the morning and her in the evening.

    Since the first of November, when our neighbor fell and broke his femur, we've been on high alert. Since then we weathered a number of next door crises, which culminated in his death on March 2 and the lockdown beginning here ten days later. So far no funeral. He is on the mantel. His wife, our Judy, has spiraled into dementia, another challenge, as she is isolated, no family in the area, and much difficulty, at least at first, in understanding that she couldn't go anywhere, couldn't entertain guests.

    And did I mention I broke my fibula somewhere in all this? Not to worry. I've survived, all healed and once again mobile.

    Then, a couple of weeks ago, our precious Toby's cardiomyopathy brought him to the end of his life.
    Am I a beast for saying that was harder than the death of our neighbor, Andy? Well, it was, for us anyway. Yesterday was the first day I haven't cried.

    Our entire life now is arranged around the governor's press conference. Neither of us have been out in public for six weeks, groceries get delivered, prescriptions picked up at the window or mails, distanced hellos during dog walks or across the street waves. We have toilet paper and a back up of twenty new cheap white wash cloths when the TP is all gone. Its not all that different than diapers, is it? The real kind I mean, not Pampers.

    We are rewatching OZARK, one of the best series since BREAKING BAD, discovered new ones lie LITTLE FIRES EVERYWHERE, UNORTHODOX, HAMISH MACBETH AND AGATHA RAISIN, pretty much all the offerings on Acorn and Britbox, and we are caught up on all our favorites on network like CALL THE MIDWIFE and 911. It's almost time for gardening, another month and we can plant after our six month winter -- it snowed last week. The tulips are waking up, the grass is green, and there are big buds on the lilac and dogwood and tulip trees.

    This too shall pass.

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    1. That is my mantra: This, too, shall pass.

      Thanks for the list of best series to watch, although I must say that I've watched the trailer for Ozarks twice and am thoroughly put off by the violence. Should I persist?

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    2. Persist. We are watching it for the second time. Trust
      Me. I’m am a nurse. Lol

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    3. OK, Nurse Ann. I shall persist. I do trust you, even though we've never met in person. HOw is that possible?

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    4. I love the Hamish Macbeth series. Robert Carlyle is one of those actors I'd watch in nearly anything. Glad you and Julie are hanging in there, Ann.

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    5. Ann, I completely understand about the grief you're feeling for Toby being deeper than that for a human. I will confess that when my cocker spaniel Barry died years ago, before we had kids, so getting close to 40 years now, I grieved to the point of not being able to eat and crying daily for some time, and I've been able to weather family and friend deaths better than that. I don't know. Maybe because our little fur babies are there with us 24/7 and such a part of our daily lives makes the hole bigger.

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    6. Oh, and I haven't watched the new season of Ozark yet. Do you think it measures up to the first two seasons? And, I have loved the Agatha Raisin television series, but I never have watched the Hamish Macbeth ones. Although I love Robert Carlyle as an actor, I just didn't think he fit what I had in mind as Hamish. So, Ann and Gigi, I'm guessing I need to give him a try in it?

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    7. Thanks Kathy. Yesterday was my first day not to cry although I miss him more every moment. I think god for little Penny, she who must be heard and fed and potties and obeyed

      The third season of Ozark measures up big time. And oh what an ending. And give Hamish a try. He’s awfully slight but he has what it takes!

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    8. Hub and I are loving OZARK - sooooo good!

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  17. First of all, thank you all for being here. It helps. It helps to know I can have at least one lovely conversation a day that does not revolve around either the scary stock market/politics, or what I'm "supposed" to be doing. I am retired, by golly, and I reserve the right to read all day if I want to.

    When we were first married in 1982, Steve traveled all over the US for roughly six months of the year, either to lecture with his films for the Audubon Society, or to film or photograph wildlife in far-flung places. I learned to be extremely self-sufficient, and to manage being alone. For his part, he learned to detest eating restaurant food, especially the fast kind. (Except McDonald's coffee, and Wendy's Frosties.) So I also learned to be a really good cook.

    For the first 37 years of our life together, when he was home he got up at 6 AM every morning (and I mean EVERY morning, including holidays) and drove or walked the half-mile to his office/studio to work. He'd come home an hour or so later for a bowl of cereal, and then back again for lunch. Home for dinner between 6-6:30. A man of habits, you see. When we were building this house we tore down the office/studio, so for over a year he had to adjust to working in the same house with me. I designed this house so we each had our own "bolt holes". We'd been so used to our own time and space, I knew we needed that to stay sane.

    So it's working out really well, and could not be better timed, really. He still starts working upstairs early, but a little later than he used to. When I wake up there is usually a pot of coffee made, and he's come down for his bowl of cereal. Then we separate for most of the morning to our respective spots, or outside, and have lunch together. Rinse and repeat for the afternoon until it's time for a "glass of wine".

    My supply worries are around food right now: butter, lettuce, coffee, cheese, eggs, wine. The local organic farm just resumed delivery, and they brought a pound of their churned butter, a dozen of their amazing eggs (that no longer seem expensive, now that the so-so kind is the same price), and some meat. And I have lettuce and carrots planted, along with kale and chard, so one of these days we'll have fresh greens right outside the door.

    I'm really grateful that the kids are all grown and still bringing in paychecks. That is a huge relief, because I know so many have financial insecurity right now. And thank goodness for Zoom. Saturday was my second book Zoom club meeting, and my middle daughter just took me for a Zoom walk around her new neighborhood in blooming Portland. And I'm grateful that we live where we can go outside, even take walks. I feel terrible for those like Grace who live in apartments and cannot leave.

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    1. Yes, Karen, this self-isolation for @6 weeks has been rather trying. Even when I broke my ankle in 2017, I was able to walk outside in the snow & cold with a fracture boot and crutches after 2 weeks! But I hope to get the clearance from the doctors to leave my apartment for the first time since March 17 soon! A nice walk in the nearby park would be heavenly (walkthroughs allowed, no stopping).

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    2. Karen - Zoom family meet ups have kept us all sane, especially with my fam all on the east coast.
      Grace - I'm so sorry you're stuck inside. I have my garden to give me some peace from the menfolk - thank goodness. I hope you get outside soon.

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    3. Jenn, I hope so, too. I am wearing out a path walking back and forth in my apartment for exercise. And I know it is exactly 40 steps to do one circuit, so you can imagine what it is like trying to do 6,000-8,000 steps/day in my apartment. Now I sympatize more with zoo animals that I saw that were pacing back and forth in their enclosures!

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  18. Karen, I second that thought. I am so grateful that I can get outside in my yard or to go for long walks. Just down the road a bit is a metropark where I can hike a mile or so loop through woods and ravines and follow the creeks--it's like a little bit of heaven tucked down a country road.

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  19. Hank, what kind of tp are you using? I ask because I have sorta been keeping track myself, every since I started using Cottonelle. I find in most cases 3 squares are sufficient. When I used Scott much more was required. I haven't tried those thick, fluffy ones. Not sure my septic system could handle it.

    The things that get discussed here!

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  20. What I have learned about my co-quarantines is that they shed. And bark a lot. Fortunately, I have a large back yard, so they can go out whenever they need to. I live with four border collies and three cats. The border collies have their whole day organized and their pack dynamics all sorted out, so they have it under control and only check in with me if it's urgent.

    The cats enjoy their routine of eat, nap, repeat. There is some friction between the two youngest cats, though. One is 10 years old, and one is 10 months old. The older girl keeps stalking the younger girl. While the younger girl reacts with street cat panic and hostility, I have come to the conclusion that the older girl is just jacking with her.

    As for me, I'm enjoying this time. I work when I work, and I read when I'm not working, and I try to clean something every day. I think I'm getting the hang of the grocery ordering business, and I'm certainly learning to order far in advance of when I will need something because I may have to try two or three times to get what I want. My TBR pile is getting shorter and my pile of books to be sold or recirculated is getting larger, but that's a good thing. I try to journal every day, and I've rediscovered my old joy of writing with fountain pens.

    Oh, and I've realized that I'm kind of bad about ordering stuff online. Yeah. It hasn't gotten into shopaholic territory yet, but I need to watch it. Everything is on SALE! But I really don't need everything. Just, maybe, another couple of books. And a more comfortable desk chair. And my step-daughter always wanted one of Mychal's beautiful journals. And . . .

    Oh, and Hank? I have calculated that each roll of toilet paper lasts 3.5 days if I'm conservative with my use. So I'm good through May.

    And, Jenn? The car is an escape pod when you need to leave the mother ship. It's just like your house--same occupants, same germs--but you can move around in it, find solitude in it, crank up the radio and sing along in it, and nobody has to know. Gas is cheap now. Just sayin'.

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    1. And we had our first Zoom happy yesterday with another friend, which was great. Although Gigi and I have been for a few social distancing walks, and I think, since we have both been quarantining for six weeks now, that we good even manage an IN PERSON social distancing happy hour or cup of tea! Outside, of course.

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    2. Excellent tip, Gigi. Between all of us, we have four cars - so I can rotate around, too! Oh, and the shopping online? I just went on a yarn bender. Sorry not sorry.

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    3. The Zoom Happy Hour was fun, and we've scheduled another for next Sunday.

      The yarn bender was clearly research, Jenn. I can tell that from here. Just as my new desk chair was a professional expense, made necessary by working from home. No frivolity here. Only serious work. Seriously.

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  21. During this time of self-isolation what I have learned most emphatically is that I miss having my own professional sphere. Given that I am now/currently working from home, my work space is now incorporated into my home space. While I pack up my laptop and dismantle my 'office' spot at the back of the living room on Fridays at the end of the work week, I nonetheless feel the lack of a totally separate work space. Also, I miss my daily commute times when I was on my own in my head; I have taken to starting my mornings with a walk at 7am to try to replicate that a bit. (In Manitoba, we are permitted to go out for such a walk as long as we maintain a 6-foot social-distancing space from one another.)

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    1. Hub and I have been taking nightly walks - we always have so it's not new - but I really appreciate it these days.

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  22. Achtung! Everyone who is set to take the two step shots for shingles-LISTEN UP.

    The second one often gives bad reactions. The first can also but the second is especially tough. I didn't know that ahead of time and wish I had. I thought I was coming down with something awful--and this was when Covid19 was just gearing up in late February. Later my doctor told me that difficulty with Shingrex is common. (Spelling?) I advise you to schedule your shots when you have a few days clear after each shot--just in case. I was lethargic for five days, had painful and swollen lymph nodes on my head and broke out in a violent rash on my head. Then it all disappeared. Poof. Very odd. But everyone's bad reactions are different--and my husband had no troubles at all with his two shots. They are well worth the trouble though. Just plan ahead in case.

    I appreciate reading everyone's experiences with social isolating. It always gives me comfort when I realize I'm not the only one having such-and-such an issue. On the one hand I'm an extrovert, but on the other, I'm also an only child. That means when I want precious alone time and can't have it, I get edgy. On the whole spouse and I are doing better than I predicted and he has developed a wonderful passion for using our new-ish Dyson. Cannot complain about THAT!

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    1. Kay, that's why I kept putting off the second shot. Although now I wish I'd gone ahead....

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    2. Kay, before I had my second shot, I was aware that the second one had been tough for some. I did make sure I had a few days where nothing else was scheduled when I got the second one, but I didn't have any problems, other than the redness and sore arm seemed to last a bit longer than I thought it would. As you say, people react differently to them and best to plan ahead.

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    3. I'm glad for you, Debs and Kathy. Ordinarily with a vaccination I barely have a sore arm. Luckily I had nothing planned but oh boy, did I worry. If my warning can help even one unsuspecting soul, then my work is done.

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    4. Kay, thanks for the heads-up about possible side effects of getting the 2 Shingrix shots. As you said, everyone reacts differently to the vaccine but I figure it's best to be safe and get some protection against the more serious symptoms of shingles.

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    5. I had heard that about the second shot. Planning is key!

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    6. I would need to talk to my doctor about shingles vaccines due to my sister's reaction to her polio vaccine back in the 60s. I didn't get vaccines until about 10 years ago and then it's a flu shot required for work, so I didn't have to wear a mask during flu season. If course now I have no choice, masks are daily wear.

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  23. I am alone so I don't have to learn anything new about others.

    As for myself, I don't think I've learned anything new about me either. I am strangely pretty consistent with or without a pandemic making me stay home most of the time.

    I mean, I already knew that I prefer to be an object at rest. So the laziness that has kept me from picking up the branch debris in the front yard isn't a surprise.

    And while I'm not paranoid, I have always been at least a little more cautious about things. Or perhaps it is just the superstitious nature I have from being a coach. However, I've yet to be reduced to counting toilet paper rolls.

    I'm getting things done that absolutely need to be done but that's about it. I do like the idea of a steak dinner but not at 1am. My sleep patterns are messed up enough already without adding a big meal at that point. My doctor is going to be ticked off at me when I get to my next appointment which will be the yearly physical that's due.

    I will say that I'm pretty sure if I was living with people, I'd have certainly killed them by now because patience is a virtue that I have little of and the quirks of other people would've forced me to bury them in the backyard by now.

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    1. LOL at "object at rest". I'm not sure if you enjoy Free Comic Book Day, but one of the things I am most bummed about is the cancelation of this year's FCBD. It's one of the outings from the Hooligans' childhood that we all still look forward to and participate in. Sigh.

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    2. Jenn, I do take part in FCBD. For years I would work at a friend's shop on that day to help out and these days I map out what I'm going to do and hit a few shops and make a day of it. I'll message you the links to some of the articles on FB, you can check them out if you'd like.

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  24. Jay, you gave me a great chuckle at "I already knew that I prefer to be an object at rest." So witty.

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    1. Kathy,

      Thanks. I wish the ability to turn a phrase would extend to having the discipline to sit down and actually write an actual story but that has evaded my grasp so far.

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  25. Living alone, I talk to myself, the TV. plants, and everything else. I may sing or hum, too.

    Both Shingrix shots brought me chills the first nights and nausea the next morning. Still worth not getting the shingles. Take care, everyone.

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  26. Surprised myself and I learned something about myself - that I have this uncanny ability to remain calm during this pandemic. I remind myself of the slogan during the second World War - Stay Calm and Carry on or was it "Keep Plodding on"?

    Diana

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    1. Plodding - yes, that's definitely what this feels like!

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  27. I had to change from teaching in person to teaching online. With the help of others, I learned how to make a video of the material for my students and post it to my class. I also became experienced with different methods to "have class" on line. I have not always wanted to "embrace technology." This situation was different; I focused on my students and their needs. Doing that helped take away some of the fear.

    As far as family situations, I learned that I need to continue to improve on my listening skills. It is hard for me to listen and not try to "problem solve" my 23 year old's life challenges.

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    1. Oh, yes, I am trying not to problem solve - it's a struggle.

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  28. I'm late, I'm late, sorry.
    Living alone hasn't changed except grocery shopping. I qualify for senior hours but since I still go to an office, I need to shop on Saturdays which is the one day I don't use my alarm.

    I'm always singing, nothing has changed, bits and pieces of this and that. I just rejoined church choir as shelter orders went into effect. We have Zoom meetings, just to keep in touch but haven't done any rehearsing. I would most defiantly be more intimidated rehearsing with Zoom, I think it would feel like solo work and I'm no soloist. I miss my weekend breakfast with a good book and unending cup of coffee at one of the local places. I miss my lunches out of the office. I am trying to read my pile of books but I keep getting great offers so the pile is getting taller and taller. And as for talking to myself, I live alone, of course I talk to myself. I have to talk to someone don't I? The good thing is I never lose an argument.

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